In this episode of We the Sunlight, Jill Stoddard talks with Frances Haugen, the former Facebook data scientist and whistleblower whose disclosures became the basis for The Facebook Files, a groundbreaking investigation by The Wall Street Journal.

Frances shares what she witnessed behind the scenes at Facebook, including how the platform’s policies, algorithms, and organizational culture contributed to misinformation and dangerous outcomes around the world. She describes the moment she realized that internal efforts to address these problems were being dismantled—and why she ultimately decided that the information had to leave Facebook.

But this isn’t only a story about Facebook. It’s a story about whistleblowing, moral courage, organizational culture, speaking truth to power, and what happens psychologically when staying silent becomes harder than speaking up.

Frances explains why “no one sets out to be a whistleblower,” why workplaces can make people feel powerless to challenge serious problems, and how being forced to participate in a system that violates your values can make you feel increasingly disconnected from yourself.

She also talks candidly about the uncertainty and fear that came with going public, the decision to reveal her identity, testifying before Congress, and the surprisingly minimal personal consequences she ultimately experienced.

And in one of the most powerful moments of the conversation, Frances describes whistleblowing as “coming home to yourself”—a process of reclaiming authenticity after living with the pain of being complicit in something you believe is wrong.

In this episode, Frances and Jill discuss:

• What Frances discovered after joining Facebook to work on civic misinformation
• How social media misinformation contributed to real-world violence and harm
• The Facebook culture that made employees feel powerless to create change
• Why people often don't speak up even when they recognize that something is wrong
• The psychological and organizational forces that encourage silence and conformity
• Frances's decision to become a Facebook whistleblower
• How she gathered and ultimately shared tens of thousands of internal documents
• The Facebook Files investigation by The Wall Street Journal
• Her decision to reveal her identity and appear on 60 Minutes
• The personal costs—and unexpected lack of consequences—of speaking publicly
• Why Frances says she has no regrets about becoming a whistleblower
• Whistleblowing as a potential path toward healing and reclaiming authenticity
• What Frances would say to someone considering speaking up at work
• Resources and legal protections available to whistleblowers
• Frances's work through Beyond the Screen to promote greater accountability and safer social media
• Keep shining the light

If you're enjoying We the Sunlight, subscribe, rate, and review the show wherever you listen to podcasts. And if you have a story of speaking up, surviving harm, or telling a truth that needed to be heard, email Jill at wethesunlight@gmail.com.
Truth illuminates. Stories heal.

Cindy Gallop has built a career around finding out.

A brand and business innovator, consultant, speaker, and founder of MakeLoveNotPorn, Cindy Gallop is known for challenging convention, speaking openly about taboo subjects, and advocating for diversity, equity, inclusion, sexual health, and healthy relationships. She describes herself as the “Michael Bay of business” because, in her words, she likes to “blow shit up.”

In this episode of We the Sunlight, Cindy talks about the psychology and personal cost of speaking up—and why she believes the cost of staying silent can be even greater.

Cindy shares how growing up half English and half Malaysian Chinese shaped her relationship with standing out, why she learned to care less about what other people think, and how identifying your values can give you the confidence to speak your truth.

We also talk about sexual harassment, the #MeToo movement, women in male-dominated industries, workplace culture, speaking truth to power, and the importance of creating environments where people feel safe to say what they really think.

Cindy also explains how her own experiences with younger sexual partners led her to create MakeLoveNotPorn, a platform designed to provide a real-world counterpoint to pornography and encourage open conversations about sex, consent, communication, intimacy, and healthy sexual behavior.

This is a candid conversation about courage, authenticity, values, sexuality, feminism, business, and the power of using your voice—even when you know there may be consequences.

In this episode, Cindy Gallop discusses:

• Why fear of what other people think can be so paralyzing
• How identifying your personal values can help you make difficult decisions
• The relationship between confidence and living according to your values
• Why Cindy believes the cost of not speaking up can be greater than the cost of speaking out
• Sexual harassment and why she began speaking publicly about it before the #MeToo movement
• What workplace culture can do to encourage—or silence—people who speak up
• Women, leadership, and working in male-dominated industries
• Why Cindy rejects labels like “troublemaker,” “provocateur,” and “activist”
• How she came to create MakeLoveNotPorn
• The impact of pornography and the lack of open conversations about sex
• Sex education, consent, communication, intimacy, and healthy sexual relationships
• Why Cindy believes we need to bring conversations about sex “out of the shadows”
• The importance of being your own filter
• How speaking your truth can help you find people who share your values
• What to do when speaking up has negative consequences
• The unseen impact you can have when someone else hears you speak out and is inspired to act

If Cindy's story made you think about something you've been afraid to say, consider this:

What truth are you carrying that might need a little more sunlight?

If you'd like to share your own story with We the Sunlight, email wet­hesunlight@gmail.com.

Truth illuminates. Stories heal.

In this powerful episode of We the Sunlight, Jill Stoddard speaks with Dr. John A. King, an author, poet, longtime activist, and founder of the Give Them A Voice Foundation. John shares his story of surviving prolonged childhood sexual abuse and exploitation—and the complicated, often painful journey of speaking publicly about what happened to him.

Separated from his Indigenous birth family as a child in Australia, John grew up in circumstances that left him questioning his identity, his safety, and his understanding of relationships and sexuality. He was sexually abused beginning in early childhood and later exploited in pornography and trafficking. For decades, he carried the consequences largely in silence.

John also speaks candidly about an experience that is still rarely discussed: male sexual abuse and the unique shame, confusion, and social expectations that can make it difficult for men to recognize, disclose, and recover from sexual trauma. He describes being denied access to rape-support resources because he was a man and confronting cultural assumptions that men cannot be victims of sexual violence or that women cannot be perpetrators.

Eventually, John began talking about his experiences publicly, appearing in the documentaries Stopping Traffic and Light in the Darkness and writing about his recovery. But speaking out came with significant costs—including lost friendships, the loss of his church community, professional consequences, and the emotional toll of repeatedly revisiting traumatic memories.

His story also offers a nuanced perspective on trauma recovery, post-traumatic growth, and the decision to tell one's story. John cautions survivors against assuming that publicly sharing their trauma is automatically healing. Instead, he emphasizes starting small, building a trusted support system, choosing the right platform, and considering whether telling the story is moving toward a desired future or keeping someone anchored in the past.

John and Jill also discuss:

• The complex trauma associated with prolonged childhood sexual abuse
• Why male survivors may experience unique barriers to disclosure and support
• The relationship between trauma, shame, masculinity, and self-blame
• How sexual trauma can affect intimacy and relationships in adulthood
• PTSD and the challenges of trauma recall
• The difference between structured trauma treatment and repeatedly retelling traumatic experiences
• The importance of self-advocacy in medical and professional settings
• Autism, masking, and learning to communicate one's needs
• The role of supportive relationships in recovery
• Turning shame into something meaningful
• Speaking out despite social, professional, and personal consequences
• How survivors can decide when, where, and with whom to share their stories
• The possibility of transforming painful experiences into advocacy and meaningful action

John's message isn't that every survivor should tell their story publicly. Quite the opposite. His advice is to start with a safe person, a journal, or a therapist—and to understand that once your story is public, you can't take it back.

Ultimately, this episode is about more than surviving trauma. It's about deciding what you want your story to mean—and whether the past will define you or refine you.

Michelle Bowdler was 24 years old when two men broke into her Boston-area apartment, blindfolded her, restrained her, and raped her. She survived the attack, reported it to police, underwent a rape kit examination, and did everything she could to help investigators identify her attackers.

But the police never investigated her case.

Years later, Michelle discovered that her rape kit had never even been submitted for investigation. Her experience with a broken criminal justice system—and the devastating impact of sexual violence—ultimately led her to become an advocate for rape survivors and for addressing the backlog of untested rape kits.

In this episode of We the Sunlight, Michelle shares her powerful story of surviving sexual assault, navigating PTSD and trauma recovery, confronting institutional failure, and finding her voice again through advocacy and writing.

Her award-winning memoir, Is Rape a Crime? A Memoir, an Investigation, and a Manifesto, is part survivor story, part investigation into the criminal justice system, and part call to action for meaningful change.

Michelle and Jill talk about:

• Surviving sexual assault and the complicated aftermath of trauma
• What happened when Michelle reported her rape to the police
• The failure to investigate her rape kit and physical evidence from the crime scene
• The devastating impact of the rape kit backlog on survivors and public safety
• PTSD, trauma triggers, and the way traumatic memories can resurface years later
• How Michelle found healing through connection, activism, and speaking out
• Why survivor voices are essential to changing how we understand sexual violence
• The courage and consequences of telling difficult truths
• How writing a memoir helped Michelle reclaim her voice
• What to consider if you're deciding whether to speak up about a painful secret or injustice
• How to support someone who has spoken up and is living with the aftermath

Michelle's story is ultimately about more than what happened to her. It's about what happens when survivors refuse to remain silent—and how telling the truth can become an act of healing, advocacy, and change.

A note to listeners: This episode contains discussion and descriptions of sexual assault, rape, trauma, and PTSD. Please take care while listening.

If you're wrestling with whether to speak up...

Michelle's advice is simple but powerful: You'll know when you're ready. You can trust yourself.

And if you've already spoken your truth and are dealing with the consequences, remember that you're not alone.

There are people who understand the cost.

And sometimes, telling the truth—even when it doesn't change the whole world—can still put a little more light into it.

Truth illuminates. Stories heal.

If you'd like to share your story on We the Sunlight, email wethesunlight@gmail.com.

In this episode of We the Sunlight, Jill Stoddard talks with Heather Rovet., a successful real estate agent and designer whose relationship with Jace Perretti unraveled into a shocking story of romance fraud, deception, identity fraud, financial abuse, and betrayal.

Heather thought she had finally met “the one.” But as their relationship progressed, small inconsistencies began to surface: stories about his education and career that didn't quite add up, unexplained financial problems, a dating profile that appeared while they were living together, and increasingly elaborate explanations for why things weren't what they seemed.

Eventually, Heather discovered that Jace Perretti wasn't even his real name. His true identity was Jason Porter, a convicted fraudster who had previously served time in federal prison for defrauding women he met online.

What followed was a painstaking investigation into the man Heather thought she knew—including fake identities, dating profiles, stolen property, financial deception, fabricated stories about his family and career, and connections to other victims.

But this episode isn't only about romance scams and online dating fraud. It's also about what happens psychologically when someone you love systematically deceives you—and the complicated decision to speak publicly when shame, fear, career consequences, and safety are all on the line.

After Heather went public with her story, other victims began reaching out. Her experience ultimately became the subject of the documentary Rom Con and helped connect her with other women who had experienced similar forms of betrayal.

Heather shares what she learned about red flags in abusive relationships, trusting your instincts, betrayal trauma, victim shame, finding your voice, and reclaiming your power after deception. She also explains why she has no regrets about telling her story—and why she believes that bringing darkness into the light can help protect others.

In this episode, we talk about:

• How romance scammers build trust and emotional intimacy
• The warning signs Heather initially overlooked
• How manipulation can make seemingly obvious red flags difficult to recognize
• The connection between romance fraud and financial abuse
• What happened when Heather discovered her partner's secret dating profiles
• The shocking discovery of Jace Perretti's true identity as Jason Porter
• How Heather uncovered evidence of years of deception
• Why victims of scams and abuse often experience shame and self-blame
• What happened when Heather went to the police
• The importance of safety when deciding whether to speak up
• How connecting with other victims helped Heather heal
• Why telling her story helped Heather reclaim her voice and power
• The documentary Rom Con and what happened after Heather went public
• What Heather would say to someone who is afraid to speak their truth
• Why “standing in your light” can be an act of resistance

Heather's story is a powerful reminder that being deceived does not mean you're stupid, gullible, or to blame. Manipulation works precisely because it is designed to exploit trust, connection, and our desire to believe the people we love.

And sometimes, bringing the truth into the light isn't just about telling your own story. It can be about giving someone else the information they need to recognize theirs.

Content note: This episode discusses romance fraud, financial abuse, deception, sexual and emotional manipulation, stalking/intimidation, and the aftermath of an abusive relationship.

Learn more about Heather and her story at heatherrovet.com, and watch Rom Con on Prime Video.

If you or someone you know may be experiencing a romance scam, remember: you are not alone, and asking for help is not a sign of weakness.

We the Sunlight is hosted by Jill Stoddard, a clinical psychologist, author, and truth teller exploring what happens when ordinary people decide to speak up about extraordinary circumstances.

Truth illuminates. Stories heal.

Want to share your story? Email wethesunlight@gmail.com.

On June 12, 2016, Brandon Wolf went to Pulse nightclub in Orlando, Florida, with his best friend Drew and Drew’s partner, Juan. What began as an ordinary night out at a place where Brandon felt safe to be fully himself became one of the deadliest mass shootings in U.S. history.

Brandon survived. Drew and Juan did not.

In the years since the Pulse nightclub shooting, Brandon has transformed his grief into activism. Today, he is a nationally recognized civil rights and gun safety advocate, the National Press Secretary for the Human Rights Campaign, and the author of A Place for Us, a memoir about finding belonging, chosen family, and a place in the world.

In this deeply moving conversation, Brandon shares what it was like to survive the Pulse shooting, lose two of the people he loved most, and find a way forward without allowing violence to take away his joy.

We talk about:

• Growing up biracial and gay in a community where Brandon often felt like an outsider
• Losing his mother to cancer as a child and how she became his first ally
• The painful experience of being outed as gay in high school
• Moving across the country to Orlando and discovering chosen family and a sense of belonging
• His friendship with Drew, the clinical psychologist whose legacy continues to shape Brandon’s life
• What happened inside Pulse nightclub on June 12, 2016
• Surviving a mass shooting and escaping the Pulse nightclub
• The devastating loss of Drew and Juan
• How trauma, grief, and survivor's guilt can change a person
• Why Brandon refused to let the Pulse shooting take away his ability to experience joy
• Turning personal tragedy into gun violence prevention and LGBTQ+ activism
• His work with Equality Florida and the Human Rights Campaign
• Testifying before the U.S. Congress
• The personal costs of speaking publicly, including harassment, lies, and death threats
• Why sharing your story can be both painful and healing
• Post-traumatic growth and turning pain into purpose
• The power of storytelling to change minds rather than trying to convince people to change
• Repairing his relationship with his father
• The importance of finding your people and building chosen family
• What Brandon wishes he had understood earlier about owning his power
• His advice for anyone considering whether to speak up and tell their story
• Why every one of us has the power to be a lifeline for someone who feels alone

Brandon's story is ultimately about much more than surviving a mass shooting. It is about refusing to let hatred, fear, or violence define the rest of your life. It is about the courage to be seen, the importance of community, and the possibility of transforming grief into purpose.

As Brandon says, the moral arc of the universe doesn't bend toward justice by accident. It bends because we make it.
If you or someone you know is struggling

This episode contains detailed discussion of gun violence, mass shooting trauma, death, and grief. Please take care while listening.

If this episode brings up difficult feelings, consider reaching out to someone you trust or a qualified mental health professional.

Connect with We the Sunlight

We the Sunlight is a podcast about the brave act of speaking up in a culture that too often rewards silence. Each episode explores what happens when people tell the truth, challenge silence, and use their voices to create change.

If you have a story you'd like to share, email wethesunlight@gmail.com.

Truth illuminates. Stories heal.