Was this really my choice… or everyone else’s?

A conversation about regret, expectations, relationships, and the quiet realization that some choices may not have been entirely yours.

In this episode, I talk about a quieter kind of regret...

The kind that builds slowly — through expectations, compromises, relationships, family pressure, and choices that made sense at the time… but maybe weren’t entirely yours.

And how, somewhere along the way, many of us stopped hearing our own voice underneath everyone else’s.

If you’ve ever replayed your life in your head… this one will hit.

So what happens when we try to choose for ourselves… without really understanding what works?

In this episode, I unpack the confusion around modern relationships in the Middle East—from chemistry vs compatibility, to being chosen vs choosing, to why communication feels so difficult, and how cultural dynamics impact everything.

And I ask a question I’m still figuring out myself:

Is love enough… or is something else missing?

Let them ignore you.
Let them disappoint you.
Let them show you who they are.

The idea is simple: stop reacting to other people’s behavior and detach.

But what happens when “letting them” slowly turns into letting everyone walk all over you?

In this episode of Don’t Call Me a Khawaga, Heba Shunbo reflects on the difference between emotional maturity and people-pleasing — and how avoiding conflict can quietly erode your self-respect over time.

Through a surprising disagreement with her nanny, Heba explores:

• how heartbreak can reshape the way we handle relationships
• why boundaries often get blurred in Middle Eastern social circles
• the cultural pressure to tolerate everything in order to keep the peace
• and why sometimes the most mature response isn’t “let them” — it’s setting a boundary.

This episode is about identity, relationships, cultural expectations, and the moment you realize you’ve been too accommodating for too long. @therapyjeff

In this episode, I share the story of the morning I thought it was a holiday… and walked straight into full school drop-off chaos.

It was embarrassing. It was funny. It was a complete disaster.

But it also revealed something deeper.

Because for so many of us—especially women—we’ve slowly become the “responsible one.” The planner. The fixer. The one who carries everything.

And somewhere along the way… we lost touch with who we actually are when we’re not under pressure.

This episode isn’t about forgetting school.
It’s about remembering yourself.

If you’ve ever felt:

• Overwhelmed by responsibility
• Like you're carrying more than you should
• Or like you’ve slowly become someone you don’t fully recognize

This one's for you.

The loud one.
The quiet one.
The one who connects.
And the one who’s already planning her exit.

In this episode, Heba unpacks the real question behind introversion vs extroversion — and why for many Arab Gen X women, it’s not about personality… it’s about conditioning.

From being “too much” after one drink, to being called “rude” for staying quiet, this episode explores the exhausting reality of adapting yourself in every room.

Because maybe you’re not confused. Maybe you’re just tired of performing. This episode is for anyone who has ever felt:
Too Western here.
Too Arab there.
Too much — or never quite enough.

In this episode of Don’t Call Me Khawaga, Heba goes out for a night out in Downtown Cairo — heels, Spanx, cabaret and all — and realizes something unsettling:

Going out isn’t what it used to be.

Is it Cairo that changed?

Or is it us?

From the chaos of Cairo nightlife to the quiet joy of being home by 10:30, this episode dives into the strange midlife shift many Gen X women are experiencing.

Why does going out feel exhausting now?
When did bathroom trips become a logistical operation?
And is wanting to stay home a sign of aging… or evolution?

With humor and honesty, Heba explores the cultural contradictions of being:

Too Western here.
Too Arab there.
And now… maybe just a little too Gen X for nightlife.

If you've ever found yourself asking
"What time does this end?"
instead of

"Where are we going next?"

This episode is for you.

Welcome to Don’t Call Me a Khawaga.

This is a podcast for Arab Gen X women navigating midlife, identity, cultural contradictions, marriage, ambition, aging, and the quiet disorientation of living in between worlds.

No self-help sermons.
No curated perfection.
Just real conversations, observations, and humor that keeps us sane.

If you’ve ever felt like the khawaga of your own life… you’re in the right place.

Follow the show so you don’t miss what’s coming.

Full episode available now.

Connect with me:
Instagram: @hebashunbo
Substack: dontcallmeakhawagapodcast.substack.com

In Egypt and across the Middle East, it’s a word used for someone who doesn’t quite belong. Someone seen as foreign. Different. Outside the mold.

Too Western here.
Too Arab there.
Too much, or never enough.

In this first full episode, I explain why I’m launching this podcast now... and who it’s for. If you grew up in the ’80s and ’90s navigating more than one culture… If you were taught to adapt, to be strong quietly, to have opinions; but not too many… If midlife feels less like a crisis and more like a reckoning It’s about time we got real.

This isn’t self-help.
It’s connection.
It’s self-awareness.

We’ll talk about identity, marriage, cultural expectations, ambition, aging, loneliness, humor, and everything in between.

New episodes every other Tuesday. Follow the show.
Leave a review if it resonates... it helps more women find us.

Instagram: @hebashunbo
Substack: dontcallmeakhawagapodcast.substack.com