These final few days of the year are a great time to reflect on the year that’s past and think about what we’d like to focus on or accomplish in the New Year. And in this episode, I’m sharing a three-part process that might just become your new end-of-year ritual.  Instead of your New year’s Resolutions being a well-intentioned flash in the pan, we’re going to kindle a flame that will burn brightly all year. 

Key Takeaways

- Reflecting on our past successes, however modest, helps build the self-efficacy needed for future change
- Connecting our goals to our values helps us tap into the intrinsic motivations that fuels sustained effort. 
- Link each goal to an identity statement that reflects who you want to become, not just what you want to achieve
- Focus on no more than 2-3 goals at a time to avoid overwhelming yourself and diluting your efforts
- Create "if-then" commitments for how you will handle potential obstacles when they arise

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

In this episode, I'm revisiting my conversation with author Oliver Burkeman about some of the ways in which we might want to re-examine our relationship to goals, happiness, and the things that are most important to us.

This is sometimes a bit painful. because so much of it has to do with confronting some of the hard limits that we like to pretend don’t exist. But, as you’ll hear, there is ultimately a profound relief and freedom to be found in facing finitude. 

Key Takeaways

1. Try to find satisfaction in the journey toward your goals, rather than postponing fulfillment until they are achieved​​.
2. Cultivating your ability to be present to everyday, even mundane, moments can lead to a deeper appreciation of life as it unfolds.
3. Understand that every choice has its consequences, and it’s impossible to avoid negative outcomes entirely.
4. Some of the most meaningful experiences in life are not the result of meticulous planning or pursuit but unexpected and unplanned.
5. Being present is a skill that can be practiced in everyday situations like waiting in line or working in the office​​–and not just on the meditation cushion or yoga mat.

Mentioned in this Episode

Upcoming Live Events for Meditations for Mortals

The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking

4,000 Weeks: Time Management for Mortals

50K Mile Tune-up Listening Guide and Workbook

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

In this episode, we’re exploring how our lives and habits have and haven’t evolved in the ways we expected or hoped, and how we can use that information to our (current and future) advantage. 

Plus: It’s time to open a Change Academy time capsule!

Highlights

- How to make the future feel more vivid—and more motivating

- A journaling prompt that can shift your behavior right now

- What it means when your letter to the future is full of “I hope…”

- Assessing whether your present actions align with your desired legacy

Mentioned

The Science of Why We Doomscroll by Emily Falk (New York Times gift link)

What We Value: The Neuroscience of Choice and Change, by Emily Falk

Letter to my Future Self Worksheet

Futureme.org (send yourself an email in the future)

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Highlights

• How the "what" isn’t nearly as important as the "why"
• A simple messaging shift that can dramatically boost participation
• How to build authority and credibility in skeptical or high-stress environments
• How to reframe selling as an act of service, not manipulation
• The one business skill every wellness pro should master (hint: it’s not spreadsheets)

Mentioned in this Episode

You Can't Pour from an Empty Cup: Self-Compassion for a Thriving Workforce (Cassie's upcoming session at HERO Forum II)

Cassie Christopher, Corporate Wellness Speaker 

The Business of Being Well: a Special Series

Join our mailing list

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Key Takeaways:

- A personal mission statement isn’t a slogan—it’s an operating system. When used well, it helps guide daily actions, not just big decisions.
- Misalignment between values and actions is a valuable signal that it might be time to recommit to your goals…or to revise them entirely.
- “Would this be on-brand for me?” is a useful question to test alignment between choices and core identity.
- When you're stuck, your values can help you move from indecision to clarity.
- Mission statements don’t have to be perfect; they just have to feel true. The goal is not to impress others, but to steer you toward decisions you can stand behind, especially when things get tough.

Mentioned

Ep 33: Aligned Actions

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In this episode, we’re continuing our series on translating business strategies into personal growth tools by looking at bottlenecks: those hidden chokepoints where progress stalls and good intentions quietly fall apart.

You’ll learn how to spot these sneaky sources of friction, and explore simple ways to loosen them—so your habits feel easier, not harder, to follow through on.

Key Takeaways

• Bottlenecks aren’t failures—they’re leverage points. Identifying them gives you a clearer sense of where to focus your attention for the biggest impact.
• Look for where things consistently stall—not where you 'fail.'  Troubleshooting your routines can be more productive than judging them.
• Delegate when you can—share the load.  You don’t have to be the sole operator of your entire life.
• Automate where possible—to reduce friction and decision fatigue.  If it can be made simpler or more predictable, that’s often the difference between doing it and skipping it.
• Simplify or eliminate what's no longer serving you.  A habit doesn't have to be perfect to be worth doing. The more repeatable it is, the more reliable it becomes.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

In this episode, we’re borrowing that same mindset and translating it into the way we think about our own self-care routines and health habits. Because whether it’s travel, stress, a challenging diagnosis, or just a really busy season, life will test your systems.

We’ll explore six ways businesses recession-proof themselves—and translate them into strategies you can use to build more resilience into your own routines. Not to control every variable, but to stay steady when things get wobbly.

Key Takeaways

1. Identify your non-negotiables--the routines, supports, and boundaries that keep you grounded and functional.
2. Once your essentials are clear, you can consciously pause or scale back the “nice-to-haves” without guilt. This prevents burnout and preserves energy for what really matters.
3. Don't rely on just one strategy. Have multiple ways to meet your needs so you’re not derailed by a single point of failure.
4. Build your reserves--whether it’s food in the freezer, margin in your calendar, or emotional stamina. 
5. In a pinch, shift from growth to resilience mode. Maintenance is a win when your capacity is limited.
6. Strengthen your relationships with the people, tools, and systems that support your follow-through. Don’t wait until things get rocky to realize how much you depend on those connections.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Except that every success or failure is actually made up of countless smaller successes or failures that happened along the way. And paying more attention to those can save us a lot of frustration and disappointment. 

In this episode, I’m borrowing a powerful concept from the world of business that can help you notch more wins, build confidence, and feel more in control of your progress—whatever you’re working toward.

Key Takeaways

1. Lagging indicators reflect the results of your actions—but only after the fact.
2. Leading indicators are the consistent, controllable actions that move you toward your goal. They help you stay engaged with the process, even when the payoff is weeks or months away.
3. When you define progress by your actions, you create more opportunities for wins—even before the results show up.
4. Clarifying what your outcome is meant to make possible helps sustain motivation—and shapes smarter action plans.
5. If progress is elusive, look upstream. Ask: "What behaviors am I consistently tracking—and are they the right ones?"

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Key Takeaways

1. Taking a break can help protect the quality of our work, create space for creative insights, and ensure that we’re using our time and energy in the most meaningful way.
2. The urge to step away can sometimes be a form of avoidance. When something feels hard or tedious, pushing through may be the key to progress. The challenge is knowing when persistence serves us and when it doesn’t.
3. Just because something was valuable or necessary in the past doesn’t mean it still is. We can get stuck in commitments out of habit, sunk costs, or fear of change. It’s important to ask: Would I choose this again today?
4. Unplanned breaks can still serve us. When life forces us to pause, we can reframe it as an opportunity for reflection, skill-building, or re-evaluating our direction. 
5. Clarity comes from asking the right questions. 

1.  What would taking a break or stepping back make possible? Would you use that freed-up time and energy to do something else that is important and meaningful to you?
2. Are there clear benefits to continuing? Are you willing to give those up, or would you regret it?
3. Are you seeing the results you had hoped to see? If not, why not?
4. Might you be better off pursuing the same goal but in a different way?
5. Is this goal still meaningful to you?
6. Am I continuing in this effort because it still makes sense, or because I’m having trouble cutting bait on the time or effort I’ve already invested?
7. Has my objective changed? Is this goal still aligned with my current objective?
8. If I were starting from scratch today, would I still commit to this?

Mentioned

Ep 488 of the What Works podcast with Tara McMullin

The Change Academy will be on hiatus for the next several weeks. We plan to be back later in the Spring with some exciting new content. If you’re not already on our mailing list, sign up here, and we’ll send you a quick announcement when our next episodes are ready! 

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

In this episode, we're exploring the concept of Ought implies can—the notion that we can only be obligated to do what we’re actually capable of. But how do we know where the limits of ability really are?

Are we being too hard on ourselves (or others)? Or are we making excuses?

Learning how to tell the difference can help you set fair, realistic, and empowering expectations—for yourself and everyone around you.

Key Takeaways

-  Capacity includes more than just your physical ability to do something—cognitive, emotional, and situational factors also shape what’s truly possible.
-  There's an important difference between "I can't" and "I can't yet."
-  Acknowledging barriers or limitations is not an excuse, it's an invitation. 
-  When setting expectations—of yourself or others—check your assumptions. Are you asking for something that’s actually within reach? Or are you expecting the impossible?

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

We explore:
  - How small shifts in perspective can reignite purpose and satisfaction
  - The power of workplace connections and why they matter more than you think
  - Simple, science-backed practices to reset, refocus, and thrive at work
  - Why transcendence is a job skill—and how to cultivate it

Whether you love your job, feel stuck, or are considering a change, this episode will challenge you to think differently about work—and yourself.

Key Takeaways

-  Work can be so much more than just tasks and productivity when we bring our best selves and connect to a larger purpose.
-  Instead of leaving a job that feels misaligned, shifting how you approach your work can bring new fulfillment.
-  Meaningful relationships at work enhance well-being, performance, and job satisfaction 
-  Create intentional time for space for mindful movement, deep breathing, or intentional connection with colleagues.

 Mentioned

Reimagining Workplace Well-Being: Fostering a Culture of Purpose, Connection, and Transcendence, by Jessica Grossmeier

Connect with Jessica on LinkedIn

Free resources

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It’s not magic—it’s science. 

In this episode, we’re talking about a 3-part recipe for behavior change that was first developed 30 years ago and is still making waves today. If you’ve struggled with change or are trying to help others make positive changes, you need to leverage all three of these key factors–in the right proportions. 

Key Takeaways

1.  Information, motivation, and behavioral skills all play important and interlocking roles in fostering positive behavior change. 
2.  Strategies that address all three of these factors are likely to be the most effective. 
3.  By considering the complexity of the behavior, we can tailor our approaches for maximum impact.

Related Episodes

Ep 129: Why it’s so hard to convert good intentions into action

Ep 11: The Attention, Intention, Action Cycle

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

But sometimes, life doesn't just serve up a bump in the road. It delivers an earthquake that shakes us to the core and opens up a chasm into which our entire life--and all of our fancy plans--are thrown.  In an instant, the goals, projects and ambitions that have been driving our thoughts, activities, and even our identities become irrelevant.

Today, psychologist Bethy Campbell joins me to talk about how to handle it when life goes completely off the rails.

Key Takeaways

1. Many of us tend to define ourselves by the goals that we set and accomplish. Consider the possibility that how we deal with life’s catastrophes may be even more revealing of our character and identity. 
2. Even when you’re stuck with something you didn’t choose, you still have the power to choose how you respond to and learn from those experiences.
3. Before we go looking for those silver linings or opportunities, it’s important to allow ourselves to acknowledge our grief and disappointment over what we may have lost. 
4. Even if we are forced to radically recalibrate our goals or our definition of success, setting doable goals gives us something to work toward and celebrate.

Mentioned

Life Directions Consulting with Dr. Bethy Campbell

Wellness Works Here

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Key Takeaways

- Reflecting on our past successes, however modest, helps build the self-efficacy needed for future change
- Connecting our goals to our values helps us tap into the intrinsic motivations that fuels sustained effort. 
- Link each goal to an identity statement that reflects who you want to become, not just what you want to achieve
- Focus on no more than 2-3 goals at a time to avoid overwhelming yourself and diluting your efforts
- Create "if-then" commitments for how you will handle potential obstacles when they arise

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Whether you're standing at a personal or professional crossroads, or debating different solutions to a problem, this framework will help you understand both the rational and emotional elements of your decision-making process--helping you move forward with more clarity and confidence.

Key Takeaways

- Quantifying vague benefits or drawbacks ("more time" vs. "2 hours per week") can help clarify costs and benefits of different options. 
- We sometimes conflate past decisions with current ones, allowing unresolved feelings about previous choices to cloud our present decision-making.
- What feels like indecision may sometimes be unprocessed emotions about what we'll need to let go of - even when we're clear about the right choice.
- Resistance to a logically sound choice often signals important emotional considerations that need attention.

Mentioned
- Decision Scoring Spreadsheet

- Sign up for email notifications

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You'll learn how your brain's reward system actually works (it's not what most people think!) and practical strategies for making lasting changes without giving up pleasure altogether. 

You'll learn specific techniques for navigating cravings, resetting your reward system, and creating new habits that satisfy your brain's needs in more constructive ways. If you're tired of feeling stuck in cycles of pleasure-seeking behaviors, this episode offers a fresh perspective and actionable solutions for lasting change.

Key Takeaways

1. Some habits are simply routines, but some habitual behaviors engage the brain’s reward centers, which makes them harder to break.
2. Dopamine doesn't make us feel good. It motivates us to pursue certain anticipated rewards. 
3. The reward we get from unwholesome habits often gets less potent over time. Recognizing this can be a powerful step toward breaking the cycle.
4. Instead of exhausting your willpower trying to resist these habits, focus on pursuing something else that provides a similar neurochemical reward but without the negative consequences.
5. Changing the context in which a habit occurs can help weaken its hold. The more cues you disrupt, the easier it will be to weaken automatic responses and create new habits

Mentioned

Ep #156: Why we resist positive change

Ep #157: What to do with negative thoughts

Get email notifications when new episodes publish

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I even made you a cool decision tree worksheet to help you apply these concepts to your own thoughts and move forward with more clarity and confidence.

Key Takeaways

1. Remember that not all true thoughts are helpful—reframing them can better support your growth.
2. Keep an eye out for absolute statements like "always" or "never;" these are red flags for cognitive distortions.
3. Thoughts that are neither true nor helpful can be safely disregarded.
4. Building your "True and Helpful Thought Library" can help keep you focused on your growth and progress. 

Mentioned in this Episode

Decision Tree Worksheet

Episode #156: How to Overcome Your Resistance to Change

Workbook/Listening Guide: 8 Things You Need to Create Positive Change

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Key Takeaways:

- Remember that resistance is often a self-protection mechanism, not laziness or stubbornness
- Be alert to the four ways that resistance might show up: emotionally, cognitively, socially, and physically
- Instead of fighting resistance, get curious about what it's trying to protect
- Take the smallest possible step toward desired change to build confidence gradually

Lab Experiment

Step 1: Awareness

The next time you notice yourself pushing back against a change - even a positive one - pause and notice what's happening in four areas:

1. Your emotions: What feelings are coming up? 
2. Your body: Where do you feel the resistance physically? 
3. Your thoughts: What story are you telling yourself? 
4. Your relationships: How might this change affect your connections with others? 

Step 2: Curiosity

When you notice resistance, instead of saying "Why can't I just do this?" try asking "What might I be trying to protect?" 

Step 3: Incremental Action. 

Ask yourself "What's the smallest possible step I could take toward this change?" 

Related Listening

Episode #137: How to do the things you don't want to do

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

This episode challenges that mindset, showing you how to turn these final months into a period of meaningful progress. Join me to reassess your goals without self-judgment, adapt your habits for the holiday season, and create a focused approach that will allow you to end the year feeling victorious.

Key Takeaways

- Select 1-2 carefully chosen goals for a year-end focus, instead of trying to salvage everything at once.

- Keep your essential habits strong during holiday disruptions by identifying your true non-negotiables.

- Use regular check-ins to stay connected to your objectives and adjust as needed.

- Small, steady actions create more lasting change than big dramatic gestures.

Mentioned

- Episode #154: The Surprising Secret to Enjoying Weekends and Vacations

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Molly Watts returns to the Change Academy to help me unravel the counterintuitive link between structure and relaxation. Learn how to craft routines that boost mental and physical well-being, make your time off more enjoyable, and ease the transition back into your normal schedule.

Key Takeaways
- It's important to challenge our assumptions about what "freedom" really means in our lives. True freedom often comes from embracing structure, not abandoning it.
- When it comes to improved mental and physical well-being, the consistency of our routines matters more than optimizing them.
- Building awareness of how routine disruptions affect us can help us make better choices.
- Structure and routine are not the opposite of freedom, but the scaffolding that makes freedom possible. With practice, we can learn to find freedom within structure, leading to greater life satisfaction and achievement of our goals.

Mentioned
- Alcohol Minimalist Podcast with Molly Watts

- Weighless Program for sustainable weight management

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Key Takeaways: 

1. Develop your 'change muscles': The ability to change is a skill that improves with practice and transfers across different areas of life.
2. Adopt a flexible mindset: Life is dynamic, so our approach to change should be adaptable rather than rigid.
3. Reframe change as evolution: Instead of 'fixing' what's broken, focus on growing into who you want to become.
4. Shift from 'doing' to 'being': Align your actions with your desired identity for more sustainable change.
5. View ongoing change as self-expression: Your growth journey is a unique way of expressing your values and aspirations.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Whether you're a perfectionist paralyzed by the fear of making mistakes, or a risk-taker looking to fail smarter, let’s rewrite the script on what it means to fail -- and succeed -- in both personal and professional realms.

Key Takeaways:

• Failure is a form of currency that you can use to purchase success.
• A growth mindset allows us to view challenges as opportunities for learning and improvement.
• Practice cognitive flexibility by examining failures from multiple perspectives.
• Approach setbacks with curiosity, analyzing them like a scientist to extract valuable insights.
• Remember that avoiding failure often leads to stagnation; taking risks is essential for growth.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Practice doesn't make perfect; it makes permanent - choose wisely what you reinforce.

Key Takeaways:
- What we repeat, we reinforce.  Be sure you are reinforcing the thoughts and actions that you want to strengthen
- Beware the "streak" trap: While consistency is important, don't let a break in your streak derail your long-term progress
- Quality beats quantity:  Focused, deliberate practice yields better results than mindless repetition.
- Mental practice matters: Your thoughts and self-talk are as crucial to practice as physical actions.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Whether you're offering feedback as a manager, colleague, spouse, or friend, this episode provides pro-level strategies that will transform your communication and foster meaningful change in others.

Key Takeaways

1. We earn the right to be able to offer feedback by focusing on the relationship first and establishing connection.
2. Always precede constructive feedback with genuine praise to build trust and boost self-efficacy.
3. Avoid using "but" when transitioning from praise to constructive feedback, as it tends to negate everything that came before.
4. Frame constructive feedback positively by encouraging specific alternative behaviors rather than simply telling someone to stop doing something.
5. When giving feedback, "strike when the iron is cold" to ensure emotions are not running high and both parties are receptive.

Related Listening

Ep #140: Growth Factor: How to ask for (and receive) feedback

Links

Life Directions Consulting with Dr. Bethy Campbell

Meet me in Nashville for the ISCEBS Symposium

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Whether you're aiming to improve your health, boost your productivity, or cultivate a new skill, having a solid support strategy can be the difference between frustration and success. 

But getting the people around you to support you in ways that you find supportive can be challenging. Here are some ways to set yourself up for success.

Key Takeaways

1. Be specific when asking for support from friends and family. Don't expect them to read your mind – tell them exactly how they can help. 
2. Remember that unsupportive behavior from others is often more about their own insecurities than about you. 
3. Curate your environment to reflect the person you're becoming. Remove obstacles and add elements that propel you towards your goals.
4. Seek out people who share your goals and motivations and are actively pursuing the kinds of things you want to incorporate in your life.

Work with Me

30 Day Nutrition Upgrade

Weighless Program

Keynotes and Workshops

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

In this episode, Monica talks with Dr. Segar about her newest book, The Joy Choice, as well as her 3-step process for staying on track even when life goes off the rails.

Highlights

• Why it is hard to follow through on our best intentions
• How research on ADHD has influenced behavior change
• The concept of Goal Shielding
• How working memory affects our behaviors and how we can leverage it
• Michelle's "POP" 3-step process and why play is such an important aspect of it

Mentioned

The Joy Choice, by Michelle Segar

MichelleSegar.com

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Key Takeaways:

• Make sure that your emotional and outcome goals are supported by specific behavioral goals.
• There’s an important difference between emotional goals (how we want to feel in our lives) and the desire to simply “feel better right now,” which can often lead us to act in ways that thwart our progress toward our actual goals.
• It can be hard to stay motivated by behavioral goals alone, so try to be clear on what emotional or outcome goals your behavioral goals are in service of. 
• We also want to check our goals for alignment with our other goals and our values and adjust as necessary. 

Lab Experiment:

Make a list of your current goals, objectives and aspirations and sort them into behavioral, emotional, and outcome goals.

• Does one category dominate your list? 
• If most of your goals are behavioral, what sort of outcome or emotional goals will these behaviors lead to?
• Are your emotional goals supported by behavioral goals?
• Are your outcome goals supported by specific behavioral goals? 
• Why do these outcomes matter to you; how do they align with your values and long-term vision?
• What emotional goals might your outcome goals serve? 
• Do you have goals that are in conflict with one another? Can these two goals co-exist?
• If not, how do your values suggest you ought to proceed?
• Do your goals reflect the things you care about most? Do they bring you closer to a life that is aligned with your deepest values? 

Mentioned

Weighless Program for sustainable weight management

Overcoming stress and emotional eating

Happiness Trap by Russ Harris

Ep #146: Sense foraging: How to do an end run around the DMN

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

You might think that the solution would be to somehow ratchet down DMN activity. Unfortunately, this is almost impossible to do. But it turns out that there’s a surprisingly simple way to do an end run around that pesky DMN, and open up possibilities that have eluded us before.

Key Takeaways

1. Recognize your DMN at work: Next time you find yourself stuck in a negative thought loop or unwanted behavior, pause and acknowledge that this might be your Default Mode Network (DMN) running on autopilot. 
2. Engage your senses to shift your mindset: When stress or old habits threaten to take over, try the "5-4-3" exercise: Observe 5 things you can see, 4 things you can feel, and 3 things you can hear. This simple practice can help break the DMN's hold. 
3. Embrace novelty in your routine: Look for small ways to introduce variety into your daily life, like taking a different route to work or trying a new type of exercise. Remember, even minor changes can boost your mood and broaden your perspective. 
4. Practice intentional sense foraging: Set aside time each day to deliberately tune into your sensory experiences. This doesn't require anything special - just pay attention to the sights, sounds, and sensations around you in everyday moments. 
5. Understand how stress affects your perception. When you're feeling overwhelmed, remember that stress can dampen your sensory perception. Try to counteract this by consciously tuning into your environment through your senses. 

Mentioned

Better in Every Sense: How the New Science of Sensation Can Help You Reclaim Your Life, by Norm Farb and Zindel Segal

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Key Takeaways

1. Planning provides structure, focus, and accountability. Without a plan, it's too easy for your goals and intentions to get lost in the shuffle of daily life. 
2. Having contingency plans allows you to adapt when obstacles arise, maintaining momentum and flexibility.
3. Remember to be kind to your future self when making plans. Create plans that include not only productive tasks but also rest, relaxation, and treats. 
4. Even if your plans are not perfect, the act of sticking to them anyway (until you can adjust them) reinforces your identity as someone who keeps their commitments–even to themselves. 

Mentioned
- Episode #138: Why goals are not always enough

- Have a nagging question or a problem you’re running up against, or just something you’ve noticed and want to share? Send an email or leave a voicemail and I’ll discuss it (anonymously) in a future episode.

- Learn more about the Weighless Program

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Certain mental reactions often masquerade as genuine curiosity. In this episode, you'll learn to recognize these imposters and pivot instead to the kind of inquiry that actually moves you forward instead of leaving you stuck in the same old repeating patterns. 

Key Takeaways

1. The goal of curiosity is less about explaining what happened and more about exploring what might happen next.
2. Don't be in a rush to get to "the answer." By slowing down the process we can access information that might not be immediately apparent. 
3. When we need something to be a certain way, it’s hard to see what it actually is. 
4. The partner to curiosity is flexibility, looking for multiple ways to pursue an outcome. (Chances are, you'll need them all eventually).
5. Not everything will work but, if we can be curious, everything can contribute to your success. 

Mentioned

Learn more about the Weighless Program

Have a nagging question or a problem you’re running up against, or just something you’ve noticed and want to share? Send an email or leave a voicemail and I'll discuss it (anonymously) in a future episode

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

What we don't always realize (or fully acknowledge) is that the choices we make today, the actions we do or do not take, are actually creating that future. For better or worse.  Let’s make sure that Future You doesn’t look back at today’s choices with regret.

Key Takeaways

1. Stop waiting for the "perfect time" to start working towards your goals – resolve to begin today. 
2. Remember that obstacles and challenges are part of life's fabric, not temporary disruptions. Learn to progress despite them. 
3. Be aware of how often you prioritize others' needs over your own goals and the impact this may have on your life's trajectory.
4. Commit to taking action, even if you're unsure of the perfect first step. Action often leads to clarity. 
5. Be willing to tolerate the discomfort of developing new skills or habits, rather than avoiding it and deferring your progress. 
6. It's important not to just visualize your end goal, but also the daily effort required to achieve it. 

Mentioned

Change Academy #139: Finding your why
Change Academy #106 Why insight isn’t enough
Change Academy #6: The hidden cost of unmet goals

Join us in the Weighless program

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Karen is one of the most inspiring people I’ve ever worked with and I want you to meet her. 

Key Takeaways

1. You may be tempted to focus on the behaviors that you want to change. But developing healthier strategies to manage life's challenges is key to sustainable transformation.
2. Prioritizing self-care may feel uncomfortable at first. But investing in your own wellbeing enhances your capacity to be there for others. It's not selfish; it's necessary. 
3. Stepping back can create space for others to rise to the occasion. You may be surprised at the growth and resilience this empowers in those around you. 
4. Change is an ongoing journey of growth, not a race to a fixed destination. Allow your vision of a "good life" to continue to evolve as you do. 
5. Be courageous in examining the patterns and beliefs that have kept you stuck. Take a "leap of faith" that the temporary discomfort of change will be worth it. 

Mentioned:
Stress and Emotional Eating program
Weighless program

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In this episode, I share the attitudes and behaviors that my most successful clients all embody - insights that can help propel your own progress, whether you're working with a coach privately, or in a group, or going it alone.  You'll learn practical strategies for taking ownership, staying motivated, and making real progress towards your goals. 

Key Takeaways

1. Only when we are willing to take responsibility for our actions (or inactions) can we make the changes needed to achieve our goals.
2. Regular reflection is critical to internalizing what you are learning and maintaining progress. 
3. Rather than passively waiting for solutions, think ahead, ask for what you need, and seek feedback. 
4. Commit to viewing failures as opportunities to learn and refine your strategies, rather than as reasons to give up.
5. A coach's role is to provide perspective, accountability, collaborative problem-solving, and support. The motivation and the willingness to do the work must come from you.

Mentioned

Weighless Program enrollment information

Whether you're looking to improve your communication, enhance your work performance, or strengthen your personal relationships, this conversation is a must-listen for anyone committed to continuous improvement and personal growth.

Key Takeaways

1. If what you are really seeking is validation or reassurance, ask for that instead of asking for feedback. 
2. Asking first for specific examples of what is going well can make it easier to benefit from any constructive criticism that follows. 
3. Remember that giving feedback (especially to someone you care about) can be just as scary or challenging as being on the receiving end. 
4. When receiving feedback, confirming that you heard what the other person said is more important than disputing details or offering explanations.
5. When feedback elicits a big emotional response, simply thank the person for their feedback and ask for time to process before responding. 

Get in touch

Send us an email (hello@changeacademypodcast.com)

Leave us a voicemail (changeacademypodcast.com/voicemail)

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It doesn’t sound like it would be that hard.  But often it takes a little digging to get at the true heart of our WHY, our compelling reason. 

Whether your goals have to do with your health, finances, career, relationships, or anything else, uncovering your compelling reason is crucial. Because it not only increases your chances of success; it also bolsters your overall mental and emotional health. 

Key Takeaways

• Knowing what you want to change (or how you’re going to go about it) often isn’t enough to overcome the counter-pressure of the status quo.
• A lack of alignment between our goals and our values causes internal conflict that reduces our resilience to everyday stresses.
• When we pursue changes or goals that are about other people’s expectations or approval, succeeding may not be as satisfying or rewarding as we think
• Wanting to avoid something bad is just as valid a reason as wanting to obtain something good. But it is a different sort of why.

Action Steps

1. Make a list of your reasons for wanting to accomplish a certain goal or create a specific change. 
2. For each reason, ask yourself: But why do I want that? What would that bring into my life? Then what? 
3. Keep asking that question until your answers feel connected to what you value most.

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Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Takeaways:

1. A goal often involves achieving a certain result or crossing a certain finish line. But goals often lose their power to motivate us as soon as we achieve them.
2. An objective goes beyond “I want to achieve this” more into the territory of “this is who and how I want to be.”
3. Think about what objective or identity each of your goals contributes to. This ensures that even short-term achievements are connected to long-term objectives. 
4. Listening to podcasts does not create change. You have to actually put these insights and tools to work in your own life.

Mentioned:
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Behavioral activation offers us a framework for understanding and responding to that familiar situation of not wanting to do the thing that we know will actually move us forward.

Joining me on the show today is Dr. Bethy Campbell, a clinical psychologist, teacher, and coach who regularly stops by the Change Academy to help us make sense of our own brains.

Four Ways We Get Stuck (and How to Get Unstuck)

1. Overcoping (aka doubling down):: Excessive or overly intense efforts to manage stress or negative emotions.
   What to do: Set realistic goals, prioritize, and establish boundaries
2. Avoidance (aka procrastination): Staying away from situations, activities, or thoughts that are distressing.
   What to do: Break the task or behavior into small steps
3. Withdrawal (aka isolating): Staying away from people and activities that you previously enjoyed; refusing to ask for help or support.
   What to do: Actively seek out social interactions and engaging activities
4. Unintentionality (aka numbing): Lack of awareness or conscious control over behaviors: engaging in mindless activity that may not be that rewarding.
   What to do:  Set limits on mindless activities, create structured routines

Mentioned

- Change Academy #115: How to transform difficult emotions into powerful insights

- Change Academy #11: The Attention Intention Action cycle

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Key Takeaways

• Curiosity allows for both open-mindedness and critical thinking.
• Trusted sources are a valuable short-cut but can't completely replace our own judgement. 
• Building a bigger toolkit is great but you still need to know which tool to pick up
• Life is a series of experiments with an awful lot of uncontrolled variables. 
• The wonderful/awful thing about asking for feedback is that you might get it
• Who do you want on your behavior change team?

Mentioned
Behavioral Grooves podcast

They thought we were ridiculous: The unlikely story of behavioral economics

Brain/Shift Journal

Nutrition GPA app

Change Academy #134: Why behavioral economics shouldn't be the only tool in the toolbox

Change Academy #123: How to build the circle that supports your best work

Change Academy #50: Motivation and Accountability

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Today, we're delving into the psychology behind why we are driven to compare ourselves to others, the impact it can have on our mental well-being, and some strategies to help you avoid the compare-and-despair cycle.

Takeaways

1. Recognize that comparing ourselves to others can either motivate us or lead to feelings of inadequacy, depending on our mindset and circumstances.
2. Be aware of specific situations or people that prompt you to engage in unhealthy comparisons and find ways to either avoid these triggers or change your reaction to them.
3. Shift your perspective from others to your own journey. Measure your success against your past achievements rather than against others' accomplishments.
4. Implement a regular practice of acknowledging what you're thankful for, which can transform your viewpoint from comparison to appreciation.
5. Remember that everyone’s path, including yours, is distinct and equally valuable. Embracing this viewpoint can diminish the urge to compare and help you appreciate the uniqueness of your own and others' life experiences.

Mentioned

Stronger Bones Workshop on April 13th

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Joining me on the podcast is Michelle Segar, a frequent guest here on the Change Academy. Michelle is an NIH-funded researcher at the University of Michigan. She’s also a best-selling author and health coach whose work focuses on fostering behavior change that can survive the complexity and unpredictability of the real world.

Takeaways

1. Take some time on a regular basis to reflect on how your personal values, beliefs, and motivations align with your desired behavioral changes (and vice versa!)
2. Acknowledge emotional and psychological issues that may present barriers to change. Consider seeking support from a mental health professional, especially if you face challenges like depression, anxiety, or past trauma.
3. Take a look at your social and physical environment and think about how these factors impact your behavior. Consider where you might find supportive communities or how altering your environment might encourage positive habits.
4. Consider getting involved with community initiatives or advocacy groups that are working to address broader societal issues that impact our ability to choose healthier behaviors.  For example, groups advocating to make our cities and neighborhoods more walkable or bike-friendly, or organizing mobile farmer’s markets, or upgrading local recreational facilities.  

Mentioned

They Thought We Were Ridiculous (5-part series on the history of Behavioral Economics)

Better habits aren’t the answer?   (Change Academy Ep #111, with Michelle Segar)

No Sweat: How the Simple Science of Motivation Can Bring You a Lifetime of Fitness, by Michelle Segar

The Joy Choice: How to Finally Achieve Lasting Changes in Eating and Exercise, by Michelle 

Certification program for health coaches

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In today’s episode, I’m talking to author Oliver Burkeman about some of the ways in which we might want to re-examine our relationship to goals, happiness, and the things that are most important to us.

This is sometimes a bit painful. because so much of it has to do with confronting some of the hard limits that we like to pretend don’t exist. But, as you’ll hear, there is ultimately a profound relief and freedom to be found in facing finitude. 

Takeaways

1. Try to find satisfaction in the journey toward your goals, rather than postponing fulfillment until they are achieved​​.
2. Cultivating your ability to be present to everyday, even mundane, moments can lead to a deeper appreciation of life as it unfolds.
3. Understand that every choice has its consequences, and it’s impossible to avoid negative outcomes entirely.
4. Some of the most meaningful experiences in life are not the result of meticulous planning or pursuit but unexpected and unplanned.
5. Being present is a skill that can be practiced in everyday situations like waiting in line or working in the office​​–and not just on the meditation cushion or yoga mat.

Books and courses by Oliver Burkeman

Time Management Video Course (BBC/Maestro)
Use the discount code CHANGES30 to save 30%!

The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can't Stand Positive Thinking

4,000 Weeks: Time Management for Mortals

Also Mentioned

50K Mile Tune-up Listening Guide and Workbook

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But I have also seen people stumble and struggle. Regularly. Something happens and they fall back into old habits or patterns that they’d successfully moved away from.

It’s disappointing but it’s not a tragedy.  Because this is just part of the change process. What I do find tragic–and unnecessary–is when these lapses cause people to people give up entirely.

Today, we’re going to talk about how to survive these inevitable episodes and get yourself back in the game more quickly.

Key Takeaways

1. Setbacks are a natural part of the change process and do not negate previous progress.
2. Refrain from attaching a negative story to a lapse, as it can lead to further setbacks.
3. Approach setbacks with curiosity and self-compassion; seek to understand the underlying causes. 
4. Rebound from setbacks by learning from them and redirecting energy back towards the goal.
5. A supportive community can provide reflection, encouragement, and valuable insights

Mentioned in this Episode

Permission giving thoughts  (Change Academy episode)

Weighless program

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In this episode, Dr. Bethy Campbell and I are sharing a 4-step process that can help you exit that complaint loop and actually move toward positive change. Bethy is a clinical psychologist, a marriage and family therapist.

The technique that we’re talking about today is taken from her book on Helping Skills, a book that would be a great resource if you are in a situation where you’re frequently called upon to provide guidance and emotional support.

But this absolutely an approach that can (and should) apply to your own knotty situations.

Key Takeaways

1. Complaining has its place. When done constructively, it can help us acknowledge and process pent-up feelings, and encourage self-awareness and self-compassion. 
2. Repetitive, non-constructive complaining–in addition to wearing out our friends and loved ones patience–increases our stress and hinders problem-solving. 
3. Reorienting the language we use to talk about the problem can help us see more possibilities for resolution or change. 
4. If you don’t have a trusted partner to help you reflect, journaling or recording voice memos can help you spot and reframe unhelpful language. 

Mentioned in this episode

Converting good intentions into action (Change Academy episode #129)

Helping Skills Training for Non Professional Counselors (Enter the promo code ADC24 for 30% off)

Dr. Bethy Campbell’s mailing list

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Lauren is a healthcare professional herself, with a front row seat to some of the consequences of unhealthy habits and lifestyles. She had plenty of motivation to change. And yet, she still needed some support to turn that knowledge into consistent behavior change.

As you’ll hear, Lauren was a little surprised at how much of the work of behavior and lifestyle change is actually about some key mental shifts–including one that really struck me as critical. 

Key Takeaways:

• We often just focus on the outward behaviors we want to change, but the inner work is key.
• Your progress depends on what you want for yourself, not how you stack up to others.
• Taking care of ourselves well doesn’t necessarily take more time than neglecting our needs.
• Taking time to consider our desires and preferences can help us design behavior changes that are more sustainable
• Modeling self-care and healthy behaviors for our kids is a gift with long-term benefits.

Mentioned in this Episode:

Weighless Program enrollment info

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Believe it or not, there’s a technical term for this: It’s called the intention behavior gap. And in this episode, I want to share with you some research-based strategies for bridging the gap between good intentions and healthy habits.

Key Takeaways
- We waste a lot of time problem-solving issues that aren’t really what’s getting in the way.
- Clarity on goals and strategies is more important than how much time or money we have to spend on something.
- Willpower does not exist in a vacuum. It is supported by a range of other behavioral attributes.
- Even more important than planning is flexibility when things don’t go according to plan.

Mentioned
30 Day Nutrition Upgrade program - https://nutritionovereasy.com/upgrade

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Design thinking offers tools and processes that can help us both imagine and then execute big shifts in our lives. 

Lisa Waltuch and her business partner, Jen Sullivan, are co-founders of Encore Retreats, where they host transformational getaways and events. Lisa also has her own practice as a Life Coach through Thrive Coaching, where she uses design thinking to help her clients imagine and then inhabit really big changes. I thought she'd be the perfect person to talk about this with.

Takeaways
-Your true purpose might be better fulfilled by doing something other than what you originally trained for. Instead of asking “What did I train to do?” ask “What impact do I want to have?”

- You are never too old (or too successful) to choose a new path. You can make bold changes at any life stage.

- Don’t let yourself be shackled by what has come before. Ask yourself, “How do I want my life to unfold or evolve from here?

- Some of your values may have shifted throughout your life. Mind-mapping can help you explore your current values, which can help you design a life of great happiness and satisfaction.

Mentioned

8 Things You Need to Create Lasting Change (listening guide)

Encore Retreats

Mind Mapping Exercise

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He wrote:  “I do really well for a couple of days and then I go totally off the rails again. It’s such a vicious cycle. I just need to be be more disciplined.”

And if there is something that you are struggling to change, you’ve probably thought the same thing. But I don’t think summoning up more discipline is necessarily the answer. 

In this episode, I’m talking with someone who found a better way to create positive change and momentum–which led to dramatic improvements in her health.

As you listen, think about how the specifics of her translate into whatever you’re working on and the kind of effort you are applying to that work.

Key Takeaways

• Instead of focusing on the behaviors you’re trying to change, take a look at the thoughts and beliefs that are driving these behaviors.
• When it comes to lasting behavior change, self-awareness will get you a lot further than will power. 
• If you are frustrated with your results, ask yourself if you are happy with the effort that you are putting in to create them.
• Being able to ask for (and accept) help or support is an under-rated super power
• Offering support to others is a great way to access wisdom and insight that can be applied to your own situation.

Mentioned
Find out more about Weighless Program

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Much of my last year was consumed by the reboot of the Weighless program–a coaching program that I launched with Brock Armstrong 7 years ago, and which has now been now relaunched in a new format that I think is its best version yet. 

The Change Academy is not about weight management, per se. My goal in this podcast is to give you tools that you can apply to create positive change in any aspect of your life. But in this episode, I want to talk more specifically about the Weighless Program and take you behind the scenes of our recent reboot. 

If that is not of interest, you might want to check out our introductory series The 8 Things You Need to Create Change, or the more intensive series called the 50,000 Mile Tune up.  There are free listening guides available for both of them and either one of them would be a great way to charge up your batteries for your own reboot, or whatever else 2024 has in store for you.

Mentioned

Weighless Program enrollment details

See exactly what’s in the Weighless curriculum

Listen in on a Weighless Office Hours

Listening Guide for 8 Things You Need to Create Change

Listening Guide for the 50K Mile Tuneup

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Whether or not you're thinking about joining the Weighless Program, I hope you've found this special Mindset Reset series helpful. Our  program members often tell us that these mindsets positively affect other aspects of their lives: their relationships, their work/life balance, how they spend their valuable time, the environment they create for themselves, and their overall life satisfaction.

And if you are considering joining us, we delve much MUCH deeper into mindset (and so many other things) in the program.  We have a new group starting on January 1st.

Learn more about the Weighless Program

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If you’re interested in learning more about the Weighless Program, from which this series is derived, go to https://weighless.life.  We have a new group starting on January 1st and if you could use some support with weight management in the New Year I’d love to have you join us!

Learn more about the Weighless Program

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As with most of the things we talk about here in the Change Academy (and in the Weighless Program), the real payoff is in the implementation. So, don't just listen. Make sure some rubber is meeting the road. 

If you’re interested in learning more about the Weighless Program, from which this series is derived, go to https://weighless.life.  We have a new group starting on January 1st and if you could use some support with weight management in the New Year I’d love to have you join us! 

Learn more about the Weighless Program

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Because this series was originally developed to accompany the Weighless Program, the examples here focus on typical dieting behaviors and mindsets. But even if that’s not what you’re working on, I bet you can translate these insights into whatever you are working on.  

If you’re interested in learning more about the Weighless Program, from which this series is derived, go to https://weighless.life.  We have a new group starting on January 1st and if you could use some support with weight management in the New Year I’d love to have you join us!

Learn more about the Weighless Program

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The New Year is a time when many people resolve to eat healthier. Unfortunately, those resolutions have typically crashed and burned by the second week of January.  By taking a little time to tune up our mindset, I think we can greatly improve our chances of converting our New Year resolutions into more lasting behavior change.

This series was originally developed to give people who were interested in the Weighless Program a taste of the kind of work we do in that program. (Mindset of course is only one aspect of that program, but it’s an important one.)

We'll be sharing a new Mindset Reset every day between now and New Year’s Eve. If this series resonates with you and you're ready to take the next step,  our next group program begins on January 1st.

Learn more about the Weighless Program 

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Joining me on the podcast is registered dietitian and workplace wellness consultant Cassie Christopher. Tracking is a a topic that comes up a lot for each of us in the coaching work that we do and in this episode, we explore what tracking offers, where it often goes wrong, and how we can leverage the benefits without it becoming an unhealthy or unhelpful practice. 

I’m also excited to share that the Weighless Program is once again accepting new members! The next group begins on January 1st. All the details are at weighless.life/enroll.

Mentioned
Learn more about the Weighless Program
Learn more about Cassie Christopher’s work

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In fact, if there is anything that actually does guarantee success, it’s being willing to fail–repeatedly if necessary.

But let’s not make this harder than it needs to be. In this episode, I (and a bunch of former clients) talk about how to make this easier.

Key Takeaways
- It’s easy to see our past failures as evidence that we can’t succeed. But failure is the foundation for virtually every success.
- We never know ahead of time which attempt will be the one that actually works. 
- Instead of asking yourself “What if I fail?, ” ask yourself “What if this works?” 
- Your willingness to learn and grow is ultimately more powerful than your determination to reach a certain specific goal or outcome. 

Mentioned

Attend Weighless Program Info Session (Dec 14th, 2023)

Molly Watts (Alcohol Minimalist podcast)

Zahra’s story

Andrew’s story

Erika’s story

Marieka’s story

Many of us have bigger and more varied support networks than we even realize–or fully take advantage of.

And for those whose networks are a little threadbare, I have some ideas on how to shore those up.

Key Takeaways
- A more effective gratitude practice is to reflect not just on the things that we’re grateful for but the people and circumstances that make them possible.
- There may be people in your support network that you've never actually met. But they've contributed to your growth through their work or example.
- Feeling gratitude is good for you; Expressing gratitude multiplies the good.
- Thinking of ways you can support others is a great way to build your own circle of support.

Acknowledged

Burnout by Emily and Amelia Nagoski
Cultivate Brands
Quick and Dirty Tips network
Cassie Christopher, MS, RDN
Bethy Campbell, PhD
Molly Watts, Alcohol Minimalist podcast
Encore Retreats
Food We Need to Talk with Juna Gjata
Fit is Freedom with Kelly Howard
Tiny Leaps, Big Changes with Gregg Clunis
Ticora Davis, Creator’s Law Firm
Stacey Harris, Uncommonly More
Tara McMullin, What Works
Oliver Burkeman

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It offers some insights into how behavior change happens, why it sometimes doesn’t (or seems like it doesn’t) and how we can better support behavior change efforts–both our own and those of people around us. 

But there are some nuances to this that I think deserve a little more exploration and who better to do that with than clinical psychologist and friend of the podcast, Dr. Bethy Campbell?

We have also created an assessment for you to get a read on where you are in relationship to any change you are working on or contemplating, along with a playlist of Change Academy episodes targeting that particular stage of change. 

Key Takeaways
- By aligning our helping strategies with the helpee's readiness, we enhance the effectiveness of our support,
- The stages of change are not linear.  It's normal to move back and forth as you progress through your behavior change journey.
- Before a change is ever expressed in someone's actions, there's actually a lot of change that has taken place. 
- Change is a complex process and may involve being at several different stages of change simultaneously.

Mentioned

LifeRAFT Model , by Dr. Elizabeth Campbell

Attention Attention Action Cycle (Change Academy episode #11)
Assessment: How ready are you?

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Eudaimonic self-care includes those things we do not necessarily because they are pleasurable in the moment, but because they support our goals and objectives.  Things like getting our teeth cleaned, or doing meal prep ahead of a busy week, or spending time and money on a therapist or hiring a health coach. 

You could easily get the impression that eudaimonic self-care is better or more virtuous than hedonic self-care. But this is not the case. And I don’t want you to forsake hedonic self-care as lesser than.

Key Takeaways

1. Try to maintain a balance between those things you do because they make you feel good in the moment and those things you do because they contribute to your long term well-being. Both are important to a fulfilling life.
2. Cramming in a lot of peak experiences doesn’t guarantee that you’ll look back on your life and feel it was well-lived. 
3. One way to waste time is to spend it doing things that don’t really matter. But another way to waste time is to spend it living for an imaginary future. 
4. Whether hedonic or eudaimonic, if it comes at the expense of your mental, physical, or financial wellbeing, it doesn’t qualify as true self-care.

Mentioned

Episode 80: Rescuing Self-care from Consumer Culture

4000 Weeks, by Oliver Burkeman

30 Day Nutrition Upgrade

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Kelly invited me back to the Fit is Freedom podcast to share some tips with her listeners on how to enjoy the upcoming the holiday season without throwing all of our healthy habits and progress under the bus.  I thought you would be interested in hearing this conversation as well. So, with Kelly’s permission, I’m sharing that episode here with you.

I share a couple of specific strategies that I find useful at this time of year…one is a mindset shift. The other is straight up tactical. We also talk a bit about the 30 Day nutrition upgrade that’s coming up on November 8th—because that program is part of my answer to the question of how to stay on track even with all the disruption and opportunities to indulge that come with the holidays.

If you haven’t yet registered for the 30 Day Nutrition Upgrade, you can do that at changeacademhypodcast.com/upgrade (or just click on the link in the show notes). 

Mentioned: 

Fit is Freedom podcast

30 Day Nutrition Upgrade (starts November 8th)

Lindsey Soroka is a registered dietitian and works as a health promotion specialist for a major national corporation, where she’s in charge of (among other things) engaging the employees in wellness education, services, and programming.  

Lindsey and I first worked together when her company brought me in to offer the 30-Day Nutrition Upgrade program to their employees, Afterward, we sat down to talk about what she’s learned about motivating people and why major corporations want to invest in wellbeing programming. 

But there are valuable lessons for all of us in this conversation. In particular, I hope you catch the ways in which our efforts to enhance our own wellbeing can ripple out into our families, workplaces, and communities. 

Key Takeaways

• Companies are in business to be profitable, but the smart ones recognize that in order to thrive as a company, they need a healthy, stable and well-resourced workforce. 
• If you are feeling burned out or overwhelmed at work, you may not feel like you have the bandwidth to explore your employers’ wellness resources but this is actually the time they may be most valuable (and your employer really does want you to use them).
• When trying to establish new behaviors, a short-term commitment can make it feel more doable.  But a good short-term challenge will be designed with the long tail in mind. 
• Doing something as part of a group really helps to foster a sense of wellbeing and connection. And it helps you stick with it.
• Reaching out to someone who’s had a positive impact on you not only means the world to them but can also benefit your own mental and physical health.  Be on the lookout for opportunities to do that.

Mentioned

30 Day Nutrition Upgrade (starts November 8th)

Contact Monica to discuss corporate wellness programming

I recently checked out the wellbeing app offered by my own health insurance company. I actually think that some of the well-meaning but poorly-conceived prompts could be doing more harm than good.

To be fair, figuring out how to nudge people to adopt healthier habits is a hard nut to crack. In this episode, I share five ideas on how we can design behavioral interventions that are more effective as well as more inclusive, accessible, and sustainable. I also have an opportunity for you to see these principles in action.

Key Takeaways

1. People not only need to believe that what you’re asking them to do will benefit them, they also need to feel confident that they can actually do it.
2. People cannot pay attention to everything. Therefore, you need to help them pay attention to the right things.
3. Don’t just discourage the negative; promote positive behaviors.
4. All-or-nothing approaches (or mindsets) rarely lead to long-term change. 
5. We tend to over-estimate the impact of our most extreme behaviors. In fact, it is your most typical behavior that determines your results. Focus on those.

Mentioned

Nutrition GPA app

Register for the 30-Day Nutrition Upgrade

More info for Coaching Partners

This is something a lot of us have learned to do. And like any highly rewarding behavior, this habit has the potential to do harm…and can be surprisingly hard to break.

In this episode, we’re going to talk about cultivating new sources of reward and pleasure — ones that make our lives richer, and don’t have unintended consequences. I’ll also share three ways that being more intentional about treats can increase the pleasure you get from them–as well as strengthening your willpower. 

Key Takeaways:

• Treats and rewards add pleasure and enjoyment to life. However, we need to be intentional and thoughtful about them.
• Planning your treats offers several advantages, including increased enjoyment through anticipation and improved restraint against unplanned indulgences.
• Cultivating awareness and anticipation of treats in your life can counter feelings of deprivation and resentment, making your pursuit of healthier habits more enjoyable
• Develop and maintain a list of activities that genuinely reward you. Include both small and big pleasures. Consider also the costs of each treat. Does indulging in this treat bring you closer to or further from your goal?

Mentioned:

Ep 82: Opening up your options with Dr. Michelle Segar

Get in touch with Monica

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Our self-image is often very distorted. Others may barely notice “imperfections” that are all we can see when we look in the mirror. And, by the same token, we can also take steps to heal poor self-image without actually changing anything about the way we look. Often it starts by examining our beliefs about how we SHOULD look. 

Joining me today to talk about all of this is Cassie Christopher, whom you know from several past episodes. Cassie is a registered dietitian, workplace wellness expert, speaker, and coach. Repairing body image is a big part of Cassie’s work. She and I are also teaming up to offer a special program this October focusing on on Body Image Repair and Resilience.  

Key Takeaways:

• We form our self-image by comparing ourselves against cultural ideals, which often reflect groups with more power and/or money.
• Even those whose outward appearance conforms to the cultural ideal often suffer from poor self-image. 
• Even if we don’t have the power to change the system, seeing how it operates gives us more power to decide how we engage with it
• Self-worth that is based largely on how we compare to others is never as solid as self-worth that is based on our own intrinsic values. 
• We are often completely unaware of the degree to which negative self-perception is impacting our quality of life. 
• Accepting and celebrating the ways in which we diverge from the “ideal” can be an empowering first step. 

Mentioned:
Body Image Repair & Resilience program
Being good enough (Change Academy Ep. #28)
Body Image Self Assessment
More about Cassie Christopher’s work

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Molly is the host of the top-rated Alcohol Minimalist podcast and author of the book Breaking the Bottle Legacy.  Molly’s work focuses on helping people create a more peaceful and sustainable relationship with alcohol. And the approach that Molly takes is very consonant with our philosophy here on the Change Academy. 

Molly has graciously agreed to let us share an excerpt from her podcast in which she shares the three things she had to stop doing in order to finally change her drinking habits. You can substitute just about any unwanted or  problematic behavior or habit for “drinking” and Molly’s advice would be just as valuable. She's also generously offered a free digital copy of her book to any Change Academy listeners who would like one. (See below).  

As you listen, think about how Molly’s insights about changing her drinking behavior might apply to a behavioral pattern or habit loop that you’ve struggled to change.

Key Takeaways

• We often make change harder than it needs to be by setting unrealistic expectations and then beating ourselves up for failing.
• Failure is not proof that you cannot succeed…unless you choose to make it that.
• Small consistent effort ultimately gets us to our goals sooner than big dramatic gestures that fizzle out. 
• Self-judgment is toxic to the process of growth and change. Instead we need to approach ourselves and our behavior with curiosity and compassion. 
• If the behavior we are trying to change is one that we are using as a coping mechanism, we’re going to need to address whatever it is that are using it to cope with.

Mentioned

Download a free copy of Breaking the Bottle Legacy, by Molly Watts

Alcohol Minimalist podcast

Change Academy Ep 11: the Attention Intention Action Cycle

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Dr. Bethy Campbell is a clinical psychologist, a marriage and family therapist, with special expertise and certification in career development counseling.  During her academic career, she also pioneered a curriculum on Helping Skills, a process that people who are not trained therapists can safely use to support others (or help themselves) when dealing with psychologically or emotionally challenging situations.

Key Takeaways

• Our emotions can be a powerful source of information, but we need to learn how to recognize and interpret the signals they are sending. 
• Although our feelings are neither good or bad, the way we express those emotions may be healthy or unhealthy. 
• Our primary emotional responses may be buried under several layers of secondary emotions that need to be explored first.
• Simply labeling and rating the intensity of our emotions is often enough to dissipate their intensity.
• The goal is not to eliminate emotions but to foster a healthier relationship with them, leading to improved self-understanding and emotional well-being.

Lab Experiment

(adapted from Helping Skills Training for Nonprofessional Counselors)

Consider how primary and secondary emotions and emotional signals apply to your own life. 
Can you think of a time when secondary emotions clouded your awareness and expression of your primary emotions? Write down your recollections of that time, highlighting primary and secondary emotions.

1. What do you believe your emotions were signaling and motivating you to do?
2. How might talking (or writing?) about these feelings help you access primary emotions and adaptive signals?

Mentioned

Ep. #107: Designing your future: How to make a successful career or life pivot

Helping Skills Training for Nonprofessional Counselors by Elizabeth L. Campbell, PhD

Feelings Wheel

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I loved the concept of her podcast, which is that fitness is not just another chore that we’re supposed to do. It is a gateway to more freedom. Kelly takes that message beyond her podcast and into the real world, where she runs a company that offers hiking, biking, backpacking, and kayaking adventures, as well as fitness coaching programs to help people prepare for those adventures.  

In other words, fitness is not the real goal. Fun and freedom are the goals, and fitness makes those possible. 

It’s a perfect example of something we talk about all the time here, which is how important it is to have a compelling why, and to align our goals to our larger objectives.

In this conversation, you’ll hear how Kelly applies those principles to the work that she does. But these insights apply just as well to any other goals that you may be working on. 

Takeaways:

• For most of the things we want to achieve, being consistent is more important than achieving mastery.
• The value of creating a detailed plan always has to be balanced with the flexibility that allows us to pivot when plans go awry
• We need to be just as intentional about rest and recovery as we are about effort
• Specific events can be great things to work toward. But don’t forget to think about–and plan for–what comes next. 

Mentioned:
Fit is Freedom podcast Episode #95
Brock’s morning warm up
Fit: Active and Ageless for Life, by Kelly Howard
(Free copy for Change Academy members!)

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If you’re of a certain age, you might keep track of things like your cholesterol or your blood pressure. Or, you might keep an eye on your 401K balance, with an eye toward ensuring future well-being. 

But there’s another lesser-known metric that can also be predictive of both your current and your future health and longevity. Just like those other markers, it’s a number you should know. 

Key Takeaways

Mentioned

Life Satisfaction Assessment

Ep 48: Wisdom to Know the Difference

Happiness Curve, by Jonathan Rauch

50K Mile Tuneup

Buy us a coffee

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• What are the limits of our personal agency? 
• What are the forces that lead us to believe that creating healthy, safe, and secure lives and environments is primarily up to us? 
• How do we reconcile our personal work with the need to create better systems and healthier and more equitable societies?

Things to Listen For

09:55 The limits of what we can accomplish as individuals

12:00 A loss of trust and confidence in collective action

14:25 The unintended consequences of "lifestyle medicine" messaging

16:11 The role that politics plays in our personal development

20:10 Who does our self-improvement culture actually serve?

27:06 Solving problems for fun (and profit)

Mentioned

Tiny Leaps, Big Changes podcast

Tiny Leaps, Big Changes book

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Things to Listen For

02:17 Common misconceptions about habits

06:33 Why complex behaviors defy habit formation

14:40 The unrecognized influence of memory and emotional associations in determining our behavior
20:11 The role of self=control and willpower

22:17 Why building health behaviors around identity and values (rather than habit) is a better strategy.
27:37 The value of questioning assumptions

Mentioned:

The Joy Choice: How to Finally Achieve Lasting Changes in Eating and Exercise, by Michelle Segar, PhD

It’s Time to Unhabit, by Michelle Segar (American Journal of Health Promotion)

The 50,000 Mile Tune-Up

Weighless Program

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Which is why I want to share with you some of what I’ve observed in my most successful clients. These are qualities and attitudes that you can adopt and emulate to enhance your own progress and success, whether you’re working with me or another coach, or on your own, using this podcast and maybe some of the self-study tools that we’ve created for our listeners. Think of this episode as a roadmap for how to succeed.

What to listen for:

02:40 Having skin in the game

08:34 Taking responsibility for progress

11:00 The difference between passive and active learning

15:27 The four things coaching will NOT do for you

16:55 The six things working with a coach CAN offer

19:35 Three questions to assess whether you'd benefit from coaching

Mentioned:

The 8 Things You Need to Create Lasting Change (self-study workbook)

The 50K Mile Tuneup (self-study workbook)

Talk with Monica about private coaching

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You’ll often hear this referred to (especially in workplace settings) as “creating a culture of wellness.” But our efforts to instill a culture of wellness very often miss the mark. In this episode, we’ll talk about why and how to fix it.

Joining me is Rebecca Johnson, co-founder and Chief Integrator of ViDL Solutions, a woman-owned consulting, training and coaching firm that fosters connection and courage in the workplace.

Things to Listen For

02:56 The difference between culture and climate

05:56 The four concentric circles of culture 

08:56 The work we must do before we can change our own or others' behavior

13:05 The importance of both modeling AND rewards in creating culture change

19:00 How to initiate the conversations that lead to culture change

23:57 Building relationships and alliances that lead to positive change

25:14 The type of conversations that secure buy-in from others

Mentioned

Practicing Intentional Conversations 

Rebecca Johnson on Linked In

Talk with Monica about Workplace Wellness Programs

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If we’re not careful, we can let what we’ve attained slip through our fingers, simply because we don’t feel as motivated or rewarded by maintaining the status quo as we did by making progress toward it.  

In this episode, I have a few suggestions for how we can prepare better for what happens after we’ve achieved our goal. 

Things to listen for:

• How the fear of backsliding can diminish the excitement of achieving a goal.
• Why we need to learn how to sustain new behaviors without relying on external tracking or counting methods.
• How electronic “rewards” hijack our brain
• How to celebrate progress toward the goal without progress becoming the goal
• Why reaching a goal is less important than what achieving that goal enables us to do.
• What are the habits and behaviors required to maintain that new state?
• Developing the identity that matches our new status quo

Want to support the show?  Buy us a coffee! 
https://www.buymeacoffee.com/MonicaReinagel

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Dr. Elizabeth Campbell, better known to her clients and students as “Dr. Bethy,” is a clinical psychologist, a marriage and family therapist, with special expertise and certification in career development counseling.  I know you'll appreciate the resonance between the approach we take in this podcast toward working on behavior change and her approach to career counseling.  

Things to listen for

• How long you’re likely to be happy in your current job, according to research
• Finding the courage to leave a dream job, when you realize it’s not your dream. 
• Where to start with your career explorations
• Why your idea of who you are (and what you want) may be out of date
• Re-invention vs Re-alignment
• How False Expectations of Risk (FEAR) can keep us stuck
• How micro-steps can help you gain clarity (and courage)
• The peril of expecting your job to make you happy
• Thinking beyond work that earns money

Mentioned in this Episode

Episode #51: Habits and Identity 

Episode #33: Aligned Actions

50K Tuneup Series: Navigation System

Change Academy Playlist for Career Development  

101 Career Myths Debunked: The Ultimate Career Planning Workbook 

Follow Dr. Bethy on LinkedIn

Enjoying the show? Buy us a coffee!

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A lot of the coaching I do involves helping people better understand what is (really) driving their behaviors. These things are frequently invisible or unacknowledged–and this can result in our acting in ways that aren’t aligned with what we say we want. 

Without insight into why we do the things we do, change can be very difficult. But the point I want to make today is that insight alone isn’t enough.

What to listen for

• Using the Attention Intention Action cycle to keep you from getting stuck
• Why we confuse consuming content with taking action
• The two categories of resistance that you’re likely to feel 
• How to move through fear and confusion about next steps
• Commitments as a way to propel action and accountability
• The consequences of inaction
• Three questions I want you to (literally) answer
• My own answers to those questions (eek!)

Mentioned

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone by Lori Gottlieb

Change Academy Episode #11  Attention, Intention, Action Cycle

Nutrition Diva podcast

Email me your 3 answers

Interested in working with me? Let’s chat

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Two things that I want you listen for:

1. Stephanie wasn’t just looking to create a certain result. She was specifically interested in making a change that would be durable. She didn’t just want to hit a goal, she wanted to create a new way of approaching challenges. (Spoiler alert: she succeeded!) 
2. The other thing I want you to hear is the decision Stephanie made to not let discomfort be an an excuse for giving up. As you’re listening, ask yourself what discomfort you might be willing to lean into in order to achieve something meaningful to you. 

More things to listen for

• Making your choices more intentional
• Find more freedom by embracing a spirit of experimentation
• The surprising pay off from being less efficient
• Transferring accountability from external sources to internal motivation 
• A process that allows you to sustain habits when the circumstances of your life change
• When you’re committed to your objective, obstacles are not reasons to quit, just challenges to incorporate.

Mentioned in this episode

Weighless Program

Nutrition Diva podcast

Nutrition GPA app

30 Day Nutrition Upgrade

Ep 11: Attention Intention Action cycle

Email me your definition of success (and your primary obstacle)

Send me a voicemail

Cassie Christopher returns to the Change Academy to talk about workplace burnout and the impact this is having on both employees and employers (and even the self-employed)--and how each has a different role to play in creating a healthier and happier workplace.

What to Listen For

• The three ways you are likely to experience burnout
• How employee burnout affects productivity and profitability
• Why more wellness programming is the last thing burned-out employees want or need
• The six requirements of a burnout-proof workplace
• Why no-one wants to fill out your employee survey
• How understanding the science of burnout makes you a better advocate for your own needs in the workplace
• The most effective ways to recover from long-term burnout
• What entrepreneurs and the self-employed can do to reduce their own burnout
• How working on self-esteem can sometimes undermine our progress
• The role of self-compassion in more productive problem-solving
• The two beliefs that foster effective behavior change

Resources mentioned

Burnout by Emily and Amelia Nagoski\

Christina Maslach’s Burnout Inventory

The Liberated Mind by Steven C. Hayes

Workplace wellness workshops with Cassie

Connect with Cassie on LinkedIn

Corporate wellness programs with Monica

Connect with Monica on LinkedIn

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Often, it's because there's a mismatch between the solutions that we are applying and the problem that actually needs to be solved in order for us to create the desired outcome.

In this episode, we cover how to know whether you've got the right solution for the problem, and how to stop spinning your wheels and start gaining traction on whatever it is you're working on.

What to Listen For

• A resource for newer Change Academy listeners
• Identifying problem/solution mismatches so that you can stop spinning your wheels
• Why cutting expenses isn't always the best way to balance your budget
• The red flag that signals you're trying to solve the wrong problem
• The critical step we need to take before brainstorming solutions
• The true solution to stress eating (it's not about eating)
• Shifting the focus from problematic behaviors to the conditions driving the behaviors
• Identifying the problem that actually needs to be solved in order for you to succeed

Resources Mentioned

• Ep. 102: Change comes to the Change Academy
• Listening Guide: 8 Things You Need to Create Change
• Ep. 27: What, How, and Why Problems
• Ep. 11: The Attention, Intention, Action Cycle
• Learn more about the Stop Stress Eating program

We are redefining our respective roles at the Change Academy. Having co-created and co-hosted the show for the past 3 years, Brock is now stepping away from the mic but not going far…just a few steps away, into the production booth. 

In Brock's final episode as co-host, we share more about the process of deciding to make a big change and why deciding to end a project doesn't mean it wasn't successful. We also share more about what isn't changing and what you can expect in future episodes of the Change Academy.

--
Visit ChangeAcademyPodcast.com/tuneup to join us for a system-by-system inspection and tuneup (or complete overhaul, if necessary) of your health, habits, outlook, and ambitions.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Monica and our guest Cassie Christopher are discussing something that we often hear people say when they are disappointed with their results or their progress:  “I guess I just didn’t want it enough.”

Given the time of year that this episode is coming out, we’re betting that right about now, a lot of people may be thinking similar things that in regard to their abandoned New Year’s Resolutions.

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In this episode, we explore some possible answers to this question. 

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

But when we ask, “Will I succeed?” we often look in the wrong places for the answer.

In this episode, we talk about ways to evaluate your chances of success. More importantly, we want to offer some ideas for maximizing your chances of success.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Find out more about Weighless (and enroll) at Weighless.life/enroll

The reason we asked Marieka on this episode is that we think it’s really valuable for you, someone who is in the process of making big changes (in any area of your life) to have concrete evidence that change really is possible (even when it’s a change you’ve been trying to make for a long time!) Monica and I can give you advice like crazy and assure you that “this stuff works” but it means a lot more coming from someone who has experienced it from the other side.

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If you’re like a lot of the people we work with, you’ve spent a fair amount of mental energy (and other resources) trying to make a change.  And yet, you find yourself seemingly stuck…unable to move out of your current reality into that vision of your future.

The reason is both more surprising and simpler than you might think. 

In this episode, we will dig into what actually shapes our current reality (hint: it’s not your goals) and what we need to focus on in order to start making progress toward our future self.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

These worries and fears are totally normal. But left unexamined or unchecked, they can keep us stuck. 

In this episode, we’re going to get all of that out in the open, so we can engage with it more intentionally…and more productively.

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Acquiring a skill, however, requires knowledge plus practice. 

 If you expect to succeed at a skill without allowing yourself time to practice, you're likely to be frustrated.  (And we don't want that!)

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In this episode, we’re talking about different types of commitment devices and whether they might be useful in staying on track with whatever you are trying to accomplish in your life–whether that’s breaking a bad habit, establishing a new behavior, or meeting a challenge that you’ve set for yourself.

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In this episode, we talk about why it’s so important to be clear on exactly what value you are optimizing for–-and what you are willing to sacrifice in order to do that. It is a tricky balance to find but well worth the effort. 

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It’s called attribution bias. And if left unexamined, it can lead us to make choices or decisions that are not based on our actual goals and values.

As with so many other things, correcting for attribution bias starts with becoming aware of its existence.

Takeaways

1. Our response to an idea or judgment of an experience may have as much to do with the context in which we encounter it than the thing itself. 
2. Attribution bias may lead us to decisions or choices that don’t actually represent our true desires or values.
3. Considering how the same experience would feel in a different context is a way of checking or correcting for attribution bias. 
4. It’s impossible to completely rid ourselves of attribution bias–but being aware that it exists can mitigate its power and allow us to make more accurate judgements and better decisions. 

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

According to a recent survey by the American Psychological Association, 84% of adults reported feeling stressed out. Two-thirds say that they feel overwhelmed by the issues they face. 

This is no way to live, much less thrive. 

Most of us have a long list of things about our lives (or ourselves) that we would like to change. The problem is that when we try to change too many things at once, we end up changing nothing. That is why knowing what to focus on, and when, is essential.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

We may stumble when we’re trying something new and don’t yet know where the tricky parts are. (Fair enough!)  And then there are those things that we seem to stumble over and over again.  You’d think we’d learn how to avoid them! But one of the reasons that we don’t is that we focus on the wrong part of the story.

Every path to success includes its share of stumbling blocks. 

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Monica Johnson, Psy.D., is a clinical psychologist and owner of Kind Mind Psychology, a private practice in NYC.  She is also a busy speaker, author, and mentor–as well as the host of the Savvy Psychology podcast.  Visit her at kindmindpsych.com

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What if the answer were not to add something new but to subtract something that is not working, or not pulling its weight? 

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Dr. Michelle Segar is an NIH-funded researcher at the University of Michigan. She’s also a best-selling author and health coach. She’s spent close to thirty years studying how to create sustainable changes and healthy behaviors that can survive the complexity and unpredictability of the real world.

Topics covered in this interview include:

• Why it is hard to follow through on our best intentions
• How research on ADHD has influenced behaviour change 
• The concept of Goal Shielding
• How all or nothing thinking has sabotaged our behaviour change
• How working memory affects our behaviours and how we can leverage it
• Michelle's "POP" 3-step process and why play is an important aspect of it
• Why we need to be taught that "something is better than nothing"
• Visit MichelleSegar.com

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.

In this episode, we explore the difference between self-care and self-indulgence, so that you can make sure that the time, energy, and money you spend on self-care is actually moving you toward your goals. 

Interested in having Monica present at your next live or virtual event?  Learn more.