Beyond the Gray Transistor (https://transistor.fm) https://feeds.transistor.fm/beyond-the-gray You’ve built something solid. A business. A reputation. A life that looks the part. But somewhere along the way, something started feeling off. Not broken. Not a crisis. Just… not right. Maybe the drinking has become more of a habit than you'd like to admit. Maybe the marriage is stable but not exactly alive. Maybe you're still driven, but the fire feels different. You're functioning at a high level — and wondering why that still isn't enough. Beyond the Gray explores the gray areas of life that successful people rarely talk about — including gray area drinking, midlife identity shifts, relationships, faith, health, and purpose. Host Kari Schwear, founder of GrayTonic, helps business owners, leaders, and high-achievers understand what’s driving their habits, reconnect with what actually matters, and lead their lives with the same intention they bring to their work. This isn’t a sobriety podcast. And there are no labels here. Just clarity, honesty, and conversations most people are too busy performing to have. While many of Kari’s clients are men over 50 navigating these transitions, the ideas explored here resonate with anyone ready to move beyond the gray. New episodes every Tuesday. © 2026 Kari Schwear a028d63b-6ae1-5492-b007-190833686701 yes Welcome to Beyond the Gray - The Trailer Episode en Tue, 15 Sep 2026 02:00:10 -0700 Tue, 15 Sep 2026 02:03:38 -0700 https://img.transistorcdn.com/VVzbNETK1hB7RQ4oKvYAlolrHTnKeLO1Gv-5ACIrxZY/rs:fill:0:0:1/w:1400/h:1400/q:60/mb:500000/aHR0cHM6Ly9pbWct/dXBsb2FkLXByb2R1/Y3Rpb24udHJhbnNp/c3Rvci5mbS9kYjNl/NjgxZTdjNDY2YjIw/NjdlNjBlYTUyMjgw/OTZjMy5wbmc.jpg Beyond the Gray episodic Kari Schwear You’ve built something solid. A business. A reputation. A life that looks the part. But somewhere along the way, something started feeling off. Not broken. Not a crisis. Just… not right. Maybe the drinking has become more of a habit than you'd like to admit. Maybe the marriage is stable but not exactly alive. Maybe you're still driven, but the fire feels different. You're functioning at a high level — and wondering why that still isn't enough. Beyond the Gray explores the gray areas of life that successful people rarely talk about — including gray area drinking, midlife identity shifts, relationships, faith, health, and purpose. Host Kari Schwear, founder of GrayTonic, helps business owners, leaders, and high-achievers understand what’s driving their habits, reconnect with what actually matters, and lead their lives with the same intention they bring to their work. This isn’t a sobriety podcast. And there are no labels here. Just clarity, honesty, and conversations most people are too busy performing to have. While many of Kari’s clients are men over 50 navigating these transitions, the ideas explored here resonate with anyone ready to move beyond the gray. New episodes every Tuesday. You’ve built something solid. gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 Kari Schwear No No Why You Keep Failing at Change: It’s Not About Willpower | Ep. 31 (formerly Ep.3) 31 31 Why You Keep Failing at Change: It’s Not About Willpower | Ep. 31 (formerly Ep.3) full 45c9dc70-c16e-48da-8fe7-6a01b9b52d49 https://share.transistor.fm/s/2152358a What if the reason you keep struggling to change isn’t a lack of discipline, motivation, or willpower?

What if it’s your identity?

This is one of my favorite episodes from the early days of Beyond the Gray, and it’s worth bringing back because this conversation goes way beyond alcohol.

We all carry stories about who we are:

“I’m not a morning person.”

“I’m just not disciplined.”

“I have a sweet tooth.”

“I need a drink to unwind.”

“I’m not a gym person.”

“This is just how I am.”

The problem is that when we repeat those stories long enough, they start to feel like facts. And once a belief becomes part of your identity, your behavior tends to follow it.

In this episode, we’re talking about why identity drives behavior, why changing a habit without changing your self-concept often doesn’t stick, and how you can intentionally begin becoming the person you actually want to be.

Yes, this applies to drinking. But it also applies to your health, marriage, relationships, leadership, faith, discipline, energy, and the way you want to live the next 10, 20, or 30 years of your life.

Because the real question isn’t just:

“What do I want to change?”

It’s:

“Who am I becoming?”

I also walk you through my DECIDE methodology and explain why identity comes before daily habits and execution. And I’ll give you a simple exercise you can do this week to start closing the gap between who you are today and who you want to become.

You are not stuck with the version of you that got you here.

You are allowed to evolve.

In this episode, we talk about:

  • Why willpower isn’t the real answer to lasting change
  • How your identity is formed through repeated thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors
  • The danger of saying, “This is just what I do”
  • Why behavior change without identity change often doesn’t last
  • What happened when wine became part of my own identity
  • Why changing can feel scary even when you know you want something different
  • The connection between identity, habits, and behavior
  • How to start defining the future version of yourself
  • How the DECIDE method helps you create meaningful change
  • A simple exercise to identify who you're becoming and what that person does today

Your challenge this week

Complete this sentence:

“Five or ten years from now, I am a man/woman who ______.”

Be specific.

Then ask yourself:

“What does that person do today?”

That gap between who you say you want to become and what you're doing today is where your work begins.

If this episode makes you question something deeper about your life, your habits, your drinking, or the person you're becoming, let's talk.

Take the Gray Area Audit

Find out where you may be settling, compromising, or living in the gray.

Take the Gray Area Audit

Ready to go deeper?

Book a private 45-minute call with Kari

Connect with Kari

GrayTonic

Beyond the Gray Podcast

Beyond the Gray on YouTube

Follow Kari on LinkedIn

Follow Beyond the Gray on Instagram

]]> What if the reason you keep struggling to change isn’t a lack of discipline, motivation, or willpower?

What if it’s your identity?

This is one of my favorite episodes from the early days of Beyond the Gray, and it’s worth bringing back because this conversation goes way beyond alcohol.

We all carry stories about who we are:

“I’m not a morning person.”

“I’m just not disciplined.”

“I have a sweet tooth.”

“I need a drink to unwind.”

“I’m not a gym person.”

“This is just how I am.”

The problem is that when we repeat those stories long enough, they start to feel like facts. And once a belief becomes part of your identity, your behavior tends to follow it.

In this episode, we’re talking about why identity drives behavior, why changing a habit without changing your self-concept often doesn’t stick, and how you can intentionally begin becoming the person you actually want to be.

Yes, this applies to drinking. But it also applies to your health, marriage, relationships, leadership, faith, discipline, energy, and the way you want to live the next 10, 20, or 30 years of your life.

Because the real question isn’t just:

“What do I want to change?”

It’s:

“Who am I becoming?”

I also walk you through my DECIDE methodology and explain why identity comes before daily habits and execution. And I’ll give you a simple exercise you can do this week to start closing the gap between who you are today and who you want to become.

You are not stuck with the version of you that got you here.

You are allowed to evolve.

In this episode, we talk about:

  • Why willpower isn’t the real answer to lasting change
  • How your identity is formed through repeated thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors
  • The danger of saying, “This is just what I do”
  • Why behavior change without identity change often doesn’t last
  • What happened when wine became part of my own identity
  • Why changing can feel scary even when you know you want something different
  • The connection between identity, habits, and behavior
  • How to start defining the future version of yourself
  • How the DECIDE method helps you create meaningful change
  • A simple exercise to identify who you're becoming and what that person does today

Your challenge this week

Complete this sentence:

“Five or ten years from now, I am a man/woman who ______.”

Be specific.

Then ask yourself:

“What does that person do today?”

That gap between who you say you want to become and what you're doing today is where your work begins.

If this episode makes you question something deeper about your life, your habits, your drinking, or the person you're becoming, let's talk.

Take the Gray Area Audit

Find out where you may be settling, compromising, or living in the gray.

Take the Gray Area Audit

Ready to go deeper?

Book a private 45-minute call with Kari

Connect with Kari

GrayTonic

Beyond the Gray Podcast

Beyond the Gray on YouTube

Follow Kari on LinkedIn

Follow Beyond the Gray on Instagram

]]> Tue, 15 Sep 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1100 What if the reason you keep struggling to change isn’t a lack of discipline, motivation, or willpower?

What if it’s your identity?

This is one of my favorite episodes from the early days of Beyond the Gray, and it’s worth bringing back because this conversation goes way beyond alcohol.

We all carry stories about who we are:

“I’m not a morning person.”

“I’m just not disciplined.”

“I have a sweet tooth.”

“I need a drink to unwind.”

“I’m not a gym person.”

“This is just how I am.”

The problem is that when we repeat those stories long enough, they start to feel like facts. And once a belief becomes part of your identity, your behavior tends to follow it.

In this episode, we’re talking about why identity drives behavior, why changing a habit without changing your self-concept often doesn’t stick, and how you can intentionally begin becoming the person you actually want to be.

Yes, this applies to drinking. But it also applies to your health, marriage, relationships, leadership, faith, discipline, energy, and the way you want to live the next 10, 20, or 30 years of your life.

Because the real question isn’t just:

“What do I want to change?”

It’s:

“Who am I becoming?”

I also walk you through my DECIDE methodology and explain why identity comes before daily habits and execution. And I’ll give you a simple exercise you can do this week to start closing the gap between who you are today and who you want to become.

You are not stuck with the version of you that got you here.

You are allowed to evolve.

In this episode, we talk about:

  • Why willpower isn’t the real answer to lasting change
  • How your identity is formed through repeated thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors
  • The danger of saying, “This is just what I do”
  • Why behavior change without identity change often doesn’t last
  • What happened when wine became part of my own identity
  • Why changing can feel scary even when you know you want something different
  • The connection between identity, habits, and behavior
  • How to start defining the future version of yourself
  • How the DECIDE method helps you create meaningful change
  • A simple exercise to identify who you're becoming and what that person does today

Your challenge this week

Complete this sentence:

“Five or ten years from now, I am a man/woman who ______.”

Be specific.

Then ask yourself:

“What does that person do today?”

That gap between who you say you want to become and what you're doing today is where your work begins.

If this episode makes you question something deeper about your life, your habits, your drinking, or the person you're becoming, let's talk.

Take the Gray Area Audit

Find out where you may be settling, compromising, or living in the gray.

Take the Gray Area Audit

Ready to go deeper?

Book a private 45-minute call with Kari

Connect with Kari

GrayTonic

Beyond the Gray Podcast

Beyond the Gray on YouTube

Follow Kari on LinkedIn

Follow Beyond the Gray on Instagram

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No Why Taking a Break From Alcohol Never Works (And What Actually Does) | Ep. 30 30 30 Why Taking a Break From Alcohol Never Works (And What Actually Does) | Ep. 30 full 926d6703-d0e4-4227-81e7-7f1af6246846 https://share.transistor.fm/s/4deb2307 You took 30 days off. Then 60. Then 90. You proved you could do it. And then you went right back. Six months later, you're in the same place, asking yourself the same question: "Am I really ready to quit, or do I just need another break?"

In Episode 30 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles the cycle that keeps gray area drinkers stuck for years: the break game. Take a break, prove you're fine, go back, repeat. She breaks down the real data on relapse rates (40-60% in year one, dropping to just 7% after year five), the psychology behind why your nervous system pulls you back, and why identity, not willpower, is the thing that actually makes sobriety stick. This episode draws the line between taking a break and making a commitment, and explains why that distinction is everything.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The exact cycle: weeks 1-2 feel great, weeks 6-8 you feel invincible, weeks 10-12 life hits and you go back

• Real relapse data: 40-60% in year one, 21.4% in year two, 9.6% years 3-5, 7.2% after five years

• Why commitment cuts the relapse rate in half

• How your nervous system was trained by 30 years of drinking and why it reaches for what used to work

• Why isolation, depression, and loneliness predict relapse more than any biological marker

• The identity trap: you quit the behavior but kept the identity, so your identity pulled you back

• "I'm the wine girl. I'm the business guy who closes deals over drinks." How drinking becomes who you are

• What a "break" tells your nervous system vs. what "I'm done" tells it

• The Prove It Challenge: what are you actually trying to prove?

• The court of law exercise: would your reasons to keep drinking hold up under questioning?

• Choice 1 (break) keeps the door open. Choice 2 (commit) closes it. You can't have both.

• Why relapse rates for alcohol are similar to hypertension and asthma, this isn't a character flaw

If you've been cycling between breaks and relapses for months or years, this episode explains why. And it gives you the one shift that changes everything: from behavior change to identity change.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.

Download HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

If you're ready to stop cycling and start committing, Kari is currently accepting new coaching clients by application only. Book a call to start the conversation. No pressure. No judgment. Just honesty.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

I keep quitting drinking and going back, taking a break from alcohol, break vs commit, why can't I stay sober, relapse rates alcohol, gray area drinking, drinking cycle, identity and sobriety, quit drinking relapse, alcohol break doesn't work, nervous system and drinking, willpower vs identity, DECIDE Method, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, sober curious, alcohol-free, commitment vs break, why do I keep going back to drinking, prove it challenge

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who keeps taking 30-day breaks and going right back, send them this episode. The difference between a break and a commitment might be the one thing they haven't tried yet.

#BreakVsCommit #IKeepGoingBack #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #QuitDrinkingForReal #RelapsePrevention #IdentityShift #StopTakingBreaks #CommitmentChangesEverything #SoberCurious #AlcoholFree #NervousSystemReset #DECIDEMethod #DrinkingCycle #WhyCantIStaySober #MidlifeSobriety #HighPerformers

]]> You took 30 days off. Then 60. Then 90. You proved you could do it. And then you went right back. Six months later, you're in the same place, asking yourself the same question: "Am I really ready to quit, or do I just need another break?"

In Episode 30 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles the cycle that keeps gray area drinkers stuck for years: the break game. Take a break, prove you're fine, go back, repeat. She breaks down the real data on relapse rates (40-60% in year one, dropping to just 7% after year five), the psychology behind why your nervous system pulls you back, and why identity, not willpower, is the thing that actually makes sobriety stick. This episode draws the line between taking a break and making a commitment, and explains why that distinction is everything.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The exact cycle: weeks 1-2 feel great, weeks 6-8 you feel invincible, weeks 10-12 life hits and you go back

• Real relapse data: 40-60% in year one, 21.4% in year two, 9.6% years 3-5, 7.2% after five years

• Why commitment cuts the relapse rate in half

• How your nervous system was trained by 30 years of drinking and why it reaches for what used to work

• Why isolation, depression, and loneliness predict relapse more than any biological marker

• The identity trap: you quit the behavior but kept the identity, so your identity pulled you back

• "I'm the wine girl. I'm the business guy who closes deals over drinks." How drinking becomes who you are

• What a "break" tells your nervous system vs. what "I'm done" tells it

• The Prove It Challenge: what are you actually trying to prove?

• The court of law exercise: would your reasons to keep drinking hold up under questioning?

• Choice 1 (break) keeps the door open. Choice 2 (commit) closes it. You can't have both.

• Why relapse rates for alcohol are similar to hypertension and asthma, this isn't a character flaw

If you've been cycling between breaks and relapses for months or years, this episode explains why. And it gives you the one shift that changes everything: from behavior change to identity change.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.

Download HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

If you're ready to stop cycling and start committing, Kari is currently accepting new coaching clients by application only. Book a call to start the conversation. No pressure. No judgment. Just honesty.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

I keep quitting drinking and going back, taking a break from alcohol, break vs commit, why can't I stay sober, relapse rates alcohol, gray area drinking, drinking cycle, identity and sobriety, quit drinking relapse, alcohol break doesn't work, nervous system and drinking, willpower vs identity, DECIDE Method, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, sober curious, alcohol-free, commitment vs break, why do I keep going back to drinking, prove it challenge

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who keeps taking 30-day breaks and going right back, send them this episode. The difference between a break and a commitment might be the one thing they haven't tried yet.

#BreakVsCommit #IKeepGoingBack #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #QuitDrinkingForReal #RelapsePrevention #IdentityShift #StopTakingBreaks #CommitmentChangesEverything #SoberCurious #AlcoholFree #NervousSystemReset #DECIDEMethod #DrinkingCycle #WhyCantIStaySober #MidlifeSobriety #HighPerformers

]]> Tue, 08 Sep 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1469 You took 30 days off. Then 60. Then 90. You proved you could do it. And then you went right back. Six months later, you're in the same place, asking yourself the same question: "Am I really ready to quit, or do I just need another break?"

In Episode 30 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles the cycle that keeps gray area drinkers stuck for years: the break game. Take a break, prove you're fine, go back, repeat. She breaks down the real data on relapse rates (40-60% in year one, dropping to just 7% after year five), the psychology behind why your nervous system pulls you back, and why identity, not willpower, is the thing that actually makes sobriety stick. This episode draws the line between taking a break and making a commitment, and explains why that distinction is everything.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The exact cycle: weeks 1-2 feel great, weeks 6-8 you feel invincible, weeks 10-12 life hits and you go back

• Real relapse data: 40-60% in year one, 21.4% in year two, 9.6% years 3-5, 7.2% after five years

• Why commitment cuts the relapse rate in half

• How your nervous system was trained by 30 years of drinking and why it reaches for what used to work

• Why isolation, depression, and loneliness predict relapse more than any biological marker

• The identity trap: you quit the behavior but kept the identity, so your identity pulled you back

• "I'm the wine girl. I'm the business guy who closes deals over drinks." How drinking becomes who you are

• What a "break" tells your nervous system vs. what "I'm done" tells it

• The Prove It Challenge: what are you actually trying to prove?

• The court of law exercise: would your reasons to keep drinking hold up under questioning?

• Choice 1 (break) keeps the door open. Choice 2 (commit) closes it. You can't have both.

• Why relapse rates for alcohol are similar to hypertension and asthma, this isn't a character flaw

If you've been cycling between breaks and relapses for months or years, this episode explains why. And it gives you the one shift that changes everything: from behavior change to identity change.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.

Download HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

If you're ready to stop cycling and start committing, Kari is currently accepting new coaching clients by application only. Book a call to start the conversation. No pressure. No judgment. Just honesty.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

I keep quitting drinking and going back, taking a break from alcohol, break vs commit, why can't I stay sober, relapse rates alcohol, gray area drinking, drinking cycle, identity and sobriety, quit drinking relapse, alcohol break doesn't work, nervous system and drinking, willpower vs identity, DECIDE Method, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, sober curious, alcohol-free, commitment vs break, why do I keep going back to drinking, prove it challenge

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who keeps taking 30-day breaks and going right back, send them this episode. The difference between a break and a commitment might be the one thing they haven't tried yet.

#BreakVsCommit #IKeepGoingBack #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #QuitDrinkingForReal #RelapsePrevention #IdentityShift #StopTakingBreaks #CommitmentChangesEverything #SoberCurious #AlcoholFree #NervousSystemReset #DECIDEMethod #DrinkingCycle #WhyCantIStaySober #MidlifeSobriety #HighPerformers

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, I keep quitting drinking and going back, taking a break from alcohol, break vs commit, why can't I stay sober, relapse rates alcohol, gray area drinking, drinking cycle, identity and sobriety, quit drinking relapse, alcohol break doesn't work, nervous system and drinking, willpower vs identity, DECIDE Method, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, sober curious, alcohol-free, commitment vs break, why do I keep going back to drinking, prove it challenge No Low Libido After 50? Your Hormones May Be the Missing Piece | Ep. 29 29 29 Low Libido After 50? Your Hormones May Be the Missing Piece | Ep. 29 full 19fdc69d-a285-442d-b83e-5b3a6c5d0d00 https://share.transistor.fm/s/68083ec6 Your energy is crashing by 2pm. Your sex drive isn't what it was. You're gaining weight even though you're doing everything right. And you're telling yourself it's just part of getting older. But what if it's not?

In Episode 29 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear gets personal about hormones, aging, and what alcohol is really doing to your body after 50. She shares her own recent lab results that revealed her hormone levels were far lower than they should be, even while on BHRT, and how that one missing puzzle piece explained the energy crashes, the libido changes, and even her shoulder injury. This episode covers what most people never connect: how moderate drinking can lower testosterone by nearly 7%, how hormones affect far more than sex, and why "just aging" is the most dangerous thing you can tell yourself.

Kari also shares Rob's experience with TRT, the connection between frozen shoulder and hormones, and why your relationship problems might actually be biological, not emotional.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why "it's just age" is the biggest lie we tell ourselves after 50

• The study showing moderate alcohol lowers testosterone by nearly 7% in middle-aged men

• Kari's own lab results and what they revealed about her energy, libido, and metabolism

• What BHRT is and Kari's 15-year experience with bioidentical hormone replacement therapy

• How hormones affect far more than sex: energy, muscle mass, bone density, sleep, mood, and cognition

• The surprising connection between frozen shoulder and hormone levels

• Why your relationship problems might be biological, not just emotional

• How alcohol interacts with your entire hormonal system, not just your liver

• Why "no amount of alcohol is considered healthy, especially for your hormones"

• What to notice, what to track, and what questions to ask your doctor

• Why Rob is on TRT and how it's changed things for both of them

• Project 60 update: training for 70, optimizing what you can control

If you've been blaming how you feel on getting older, this episode might change your mind. Your body is trying to tell you something. Time to get curious.

—————

DISCLAIMER

This episode is for educational purposes only. Kari Schwear is a coach, not a doctor. If any of this information raises questions about your health or medications, please consult your physician.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.

TAKE THE AUDIT HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

Kari is currently accepting new coaching clients by application only. If you want to partner one-on-one and walk through all of this together, book a call to start the conversation.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Function Health (comprehensive labs by Dr. Mark Hyman): functionhealth.com

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 10: Still Waking Up at 3AM? (with Morgan Adams, Sleep Coach)

Episode 26: Project 60: I'm Not Training for 60. I'm Training for 70.

—————

TOPICS COVERED

hormones after 50, testosterone and aging, low libido midlife, alcohol and testosterone, hormone replacement therapy, BHRT bioidentical hormones, TRT testosterone replacement, menopause hormones, sex drive after 50, energy crash midlife, frozen shoulder and hormones, alcohol and hormones, gray area drinking, Function Health labs, Project 60, training for 70, midlife optimization, sex life after 50, low energy over 50, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, men over 50, women over 50

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who's been blaming everything on "just getting older," share this episode with them. It might be the nudge they need to finally get curious about what's really going on.

#HormonesAfter50 #ItsNotJustAge #TestosteroneAndAging #LowLibidoMidlife #AlcoholAndHormones #BHRT #TRT #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #Project60 #TrainingFor70 #MidlifeOptimization #SexLifeAfter50 #FunctionHealth #MenOver50 #WomenOver50 #HormoneHealth #FrozenShoulder

]]> Your energy is crashing by 2pm. Your sex drive isn't what it was. You're gaining weight even though you're doing everything right. And you're telling yourself it's just part of getting older. But what if it's not?

In Episode 29 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear gets personal about hormones, aging, and what alcohol is really doing to your body after 50. She shares her own recent lab results that revealed her hormone levels were far lower than they should be, even while on BHRT, and how that one missing puzzle piece explained the energy crashes, the libido changes, and even her shoulder injury. This episode covers what most people never connect: how moderate drinking can lower testosterone by nearly 7%, how hormones affect far more than sex, and why "just aging" is the most dangerous thing you can tell yourself.

Kari also shares Rob's experience with TRT, the connection between frozen shoulder and hormones, and why your relationship problems might actually be biological, not emotional.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why "it's just age" is the biggest lie we tell ourselves after 50

• The study showing moderate alcohol lowers testosterone by nearly 7% in middle-aged men

• Kari's own lab results and what they revealed about her energy, libido, and metabolism

• What BHRT is and Kari's 15-year experience with bioidentical hormone replacement therapy

• How hormones affect far more than sex: energy, muscle mass, bone density, sleep, mood, and cognition

• The surprising connection between frozen shoulder and hormone levels

• Why your relationship problems might be biological, not just emotional

• How alcohol interacts with your entire hormonal system, not just your liver

• Why "no amount of alcohol is considered healthy, especially for your hormones"

• What to notice, what to track, and what questions to ask your doctor

• Why Rob is on TRT and how it's changed things for both of them

• Project 60 update: training for 70, optimizing what you can control

If you've been blaming how you feel on getting older, this episode might change your mind. Your body is trying to tell you something. Time to get curious.

—————

DISCLAIMER

This episode is for educational purposes only. Kari Schwear is a coach, not a doctor. If any of this information raises questions about your health or medications, please consult your physician.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.

TAKE THE AUDIT HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

Kari is currently accepting new coaching clients by application only. If you want to partner one-on-one and walk through all of this together, book a call to start the conversation.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Function Health (comprehensive labs by Dr. Mark Hyman): functionhealth.com

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 10: Still Waking Up at 3AM? (with Morgan Adams, Sleep Coach)

Episode 26: Project 60: I'm Not Training for 60. I'm Training for 70.

—————

TOPICS COVERED

hormones after 50, testosterone and aging, low libido midlife, alcohol and testosterone, hormone replacement therapy, BHRT bioidentical hormones, TRT testosterone replacement, menopause hormones, sex drive after 50, energy crash midlife, frozen shoulder and hormones, alcohol and hormones, gray area drinking, Function Health labs, Project 60, training for 70, midlife optimization, sex life after 50, low energy over 50, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, men over 50, women over 50

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who's been blaming everything on "just getting older," share this episode with them. It might be the nudge they need to finally get curious about what's really going on.

#HormonesAfter50 #ItsNotJustAge #TestosteroneAndAging #LowLibidoMidlife #AlcoholAndHormones #BHRT #TRT #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #Project60 #TrainingFor70 #MidlifeOptimization #SexLifeAfter50 #FunctionHealth #MenOver50 #WomenOver50 #HormoneHealth #FrozenShoulder

]]> Tue, 01 Sep 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1315 Your energy is crashing by 2pm. Your sex drive isn't what it was. You're gaining weight even though you're doing everything right. And you're telling yourself it's just part of getting older. But what if it's not?

In Episode 29 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear gets personal about hormones, aging, and what alcohol is really doing to your body after 50. She shares her own recent lab results that revealed her hormone levels were far lower than they should be, even while on BHRT, and how that one missing puzzle piece explained the energy crashes, the libido changes, and even her shoulder injury. This episode covers what most people never connect: how moderate drinking can lower testosterone by nearly 7%, how hormones affect far more than sex, and why "just aging" is the most dangerous thing you can tell yourself.

Kari also shares Rob's experience with TRT, the connection between frozen shoulder and hormones, and why your relationship problems might actually be biological, not emotional.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why "it's just age" is the biggest lie we tell ourselves after 50

• The study showing moderate alcohol lowers testosterone by nearly 7% in middle-aged men

• Kari's own lab results and what they revealed about her energy, libido, and metabolism

• What BHRT is and Kari's 15-year experience with bioidentical hormone replacement therapy

• How hormones affect far more than sex: energy, muscle mass, bone density, sleep, mood, and cognition

• The surprising connection between frozen shoulder and hormone levels

• Why your relationship problems might be biological, not just emotional

• How alcohol interacts with your entire hormonal system, not just your liver

• Why "no amount of alcohol is considered healthy, especially for your hormones"

• What to notice, what to track, and what questions to ask your doctor

• Why Rob is on TRT and how it's changed things for both of them

• Project 60 update: training for 70, optimizing what you can control

If you've been blaming how you feel on getting older, this episode might change your mind. Your body is trying to tell you something. Time to get curious.

—————

DISCLAIMER

This episode is for educational purposes only. Kari Schwear is a coach, not a doctor. If any of this information raises questions about your health or medications, please consult your physician.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.

TAKE THE AUDIT HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

Kari is currently accepting new coaching clients by application only. If you want to partner one-on-one and walk through all of this together, book a call to start the conversation.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Function Health (comprehensive labs by Dr. Mark Hyman): functionhealth.com

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 10: Still Waking Up at 3AM? (with Morgan Adams, Sleep Coach)

Episode 26: Project 60: I'm Not Training for 60. I'm Training for 70.

—————

TOPICS COVERED

hormones after 50, testosterone and aging, low libido midlife, alcohol and testosterone, hormone replacement therapy, BHRT bioidentical hormones, TRT testosterone replacement, menopause hormones, sex drive after 50, energy crash midlife, frozen shoulder and hormones, alcohol and hormones, gray area drinking, Function Health labs, Project 60, training for 70, midlife optimization, sex life after 50, low energy over 50, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, men over 50, women over 50

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who's been blaming everything on "just getting older," share this episode with them. It might be the nudge they need to finally get curious about what's really going on.

#HormonesAfter50 #ItsNotJustAge #TestosteroneAndAging #LowLibidoMidlife #AlcoholAndHormones #BHRT #TRT #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #Project60 #TrainingFor70 #MidlifeOptimization #SexLifeAfter50 #FunctionHealth #MenOver50 #WomenOver50 #HormoneHealth #FrozenShoulder

]]> hormones after 50, testosterone and aging, low libido midlife, alcohol and testosterone, hormone replacement therapy, BHRT bioidentical hormones, TRT testosterone replacement, menopause hormones, sex drive after 50, energy crash midlife, frozen shoulder and hormones, alcohol and hormones, gray area drinking, Function Health labs, Project 60, training for 70, midlife optimization, sex life after 50, low energy over 50, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, men over 50, women over 50 No How to Relax Without Alcohol | Why You Can’t Relax After You Quit Drinking | Ep. 28 28 28 How to Relax Without Alcohol | Why You Can’t Relax After You Quit Drinking | Ep. 28 full 5f4421e7-e3d7-4685-b96e-a5bce51cb4b3 https://share.transistor.fm/s/0f589740 You quit drinking. You thought you'd feel amazing. Instead, you can't sleep, you can't sit still, and your brain is screaming for something, anything, to turn off the noise. You're not broken. Your nervous system just doesn't know you quit yet.

In Episode 28 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles the thing nobody warns you about after you stop drinking: your body has no idea how to relax without alcohol. For years, maybe decades, your nervous system learned one pattern: alcohol equals calm. Now that the alcohol is gone, your body is firing normally for the first time, and normal feels wrong. This episode explains why, how long it takes, and exactly what to do about it.

Kari shares practical tools that actually work, including a client's cold plunge story, a 15-minute journaling practice, environment changes, breathing, walking, and a scrolling timer strategy. She also addresses the bridge question honestly: if you need a little help in the first few weeks, that's okay, just don't trade one habit for another.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why your nervous system can't relax after you quit drinking (and why that's completely normal)

• The 66-day / 3-month timeline for your body to relearn natural relaxation

• Why "normal" feels wrong after years of being dampened by alcohol

• The cold plunge story: how one client replaced alcohol's endorphin hit with something better

• Why journaling 15 minutes before bed works better than scrolling (and the science behind it)

• How to change your environment so your triggers stop firing

• The 20-minute scrolling timer strategy and the 30-minute screen-free rule before bed

• The framework for what actually works: intentional, felt, rewarding, and consistent

• Why you shouldn't trade alcohol for THC, CBD gummies, or any other nightly dependency

• Why you shouldn't quit on day 21 or think you're broken on week four

If you quit drinking and you're wondering why you still can't relax, this episode is the answer. Your nervous system isn't broken. It's just catching up to the decision you already made.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free, one-page PDF with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)

Download HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

how to relax without alcohol, quit drinking can't sleep, nervous system after quitting drinking, why can't I relax sober, 66 days to form a habit, cold plunge benefits, journaling before bed, natural relaxation, gray area drinking, alcohol and nervous system, THC replacement, CBD after quitting drinking, screen time before bed, environment change habits, sober curious, alcohol-free relaxation, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, quit drinking what now, sober sleep problems

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who just quit drinking and is struggling to relax or sleep, send them this episode. Knowing the timeline changes everything. They're not broken. They're relearning.

#HowToRelaxWithoutAlcohol #QuitDrinkingCantSleep #NervousSystemReset #66Days #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #GrayAreaDrinking #SoberCurious #ColdPlunge #JournalingBeforeBed #NaturalRelaxation #AlcoholFree #DontTradeHabits #NervousSystemHealing #SoberSleep #RelearningRelaxation

]]> You quit drinking. You thought you'd feel amazing. Instead, you can't sleep, you can't sit still, and your brain is screaming for something, anything, to turn off the noise. You're not broken. Your nervous system just doesn't know you quit yet.

In Episode 28 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles the thing nobody warns you about after you stop drinking: your body has no idea how to relax without alcohol. For years, maybe decades, your nervous system learned one pattern: alcohol equals calm. Now that the alcohol is gone, your body is firing normally for the first time, and normal feels wrong. This episode explains why, how long it takes, and exactly what to do about it.

Kari shares practical tools that actually work, including a client's cold plunge story, a 15-minute journaling practice, environment changes, breathing, walking, and a scrolling timer strategy. She also addresses the bridge question honestly: if you need a little help in the first few weeks, that's okay, just don't trade one habit for another.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why your nervous system can't relax after you quit drinking (and why that's completely normal)

• The 66-day / 3-month timeline for your body to relearn natural relaxation

• Why "normal" feels wrong after years of being dampened by alcohol

• The cold plunge story: how one client replaced alcohol's endorphin hit with something better

• Why journaling 15 minutes before bed works better than scrolling (and the science behind it)

• How to change your environment so your triggers stop firing

• The 20-minute scrolling timer strategy and the 30-minute screen-free rule before bed

• The framework for what actually works: intentional, felt, rewarding, and consistent

• Why you shouldn't trade alcohol for THC, CBD gummies, or any other nightly dependency

• Why you shouldn't quit on day 21 or think you're broken on week four

If you quit drinking and you're wondering why you still can't relax, this episode is the answer. Your nervous system isn't broken. It's just catching up to the decision you already made.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free, one-page PDF with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)

Download HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

how to relax without alcohol, quit drinking can't sleep, nervous system after quitting drinking, why can't I relax sober, 66 days to form a habit, cold plunge benefits, journaling before bed, natural relaxation, gray area drinking, alcohol and nervous system, THC replacement, CBD after quitting drinking, screen time before bed, environment change habits, sober curious, alcohol-free relaxation, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, quit drinking what now, sober sleep problems

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who just quit drinking and is struggling to relax or sleep, send them this episode. Knowing the timeline changes everything. They're not broken. They're relearning.

#HowToRelaxWithoutAlcohol #QuitDrinkingCantSleep #NervousSystemReset #66Days #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #GrayAreaDrinking #SoberCurious #ColdPlunge #JournalingBeforeBed #NaturalRelaxation #AlcoholFree #DontTradeHabits #NervousSystemHealing #SoberSleep #RelearningRelaxation

]]> Tue, 25 Aug 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1217 You quit drinking. You thought you'd feel amazing. Instead, you can't sleep, you can't sit still, and your brain is screaming for something, anything, to turn off the noise. You're not broken. Your nervous system just doesn't know you quit yet.

In Episode 28 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles the thing nobody warns you about after you stop drinking: your body has no idea how to relax without alcohol. For years, maybe decades, your nervous system learned one pattern: alcohol equals calm. Now that the alcohol is gone, your body is firing normally for the first time, and normal feels wrong. This episode explains why, how long it takes, and exactly what to do about it.

Kari shares practical tools that actually work, including a client's cold plunge story, a 15-minute journaling practice, environment changes, breathing, walking, and a scrolling timer strategy. She also addresses the bridge question honestly: if you need a little help in the first few weeks, that's okay, just don't trade one habit for another.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why your nervous system can't relax after you quit drinking (and why that's completely normal)

• The 66-day / 3-month timeline for your body to relearn natural relaxation

• Why "normal" feels wrong after years of being dampened by alcohol

• The cold plunge story: how one client replaced alcohol's endorphin hit with something better

• Why journaling 15 minutes before bed works better than scrolling (and the science behind it)

• How to change your environment so your triggers stop firing

• The 20-minute scrolling timer strategy and the 30-minute screen-free rule before bed

• The framework for what actually works: intentional, felt, rewarding, and consistent

• Why you shouldn't trade alcohol for THC, CBD gummies, or any other nightly dependency

• Why you shouldn't quit on day 21 or think you're broken on week four

If you quit drinking and you're wondering why you still can't relax, this episode is the answer. Your nervous system isn't broken. It's just catching up to the decision you already made.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free, one-page PDF with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)

Download HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

how to relax without alcohol, quit drinking can't sleep, nervous system after quitting drinking, why can't I relax sober, 66 days to form a habit, cold plunge benefits, journaling before bed, natural relaxation, gray area drinking, alcohol and nervous system, THC replacement, CBD after quitting drinking, screen time before bed, environment change habits, sober curious, alcohol-free relaxation, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, quit drinking what now, sober sleep problems

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who just quit drinking and is struggling to relax or sleep, send them this episode. Knowing the timeline changes everything. They're not broken. They're relearning.

#HowToRelaxWithoutAlcohol #QuitDrinkingCantSleep #NervousSystemReset #66Days #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #GrayAreaDrinking #SoberCurious #ColdPlunge #JournalingBeforeBed #NaturalRelaxation #AlcoholFree #DontTradeHabits #NervousSystemHealing #SoberSleep #RelearningRelaxation

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No What You Feed Grows, What You Starve Dies | Ep. 27 27 27 What You Feed Grows, What You Starve Dies | Ep. 27 full 182aeff9-c6ea-4694-baa8-acc8159a6ada https://share.transistor.fm/s/bf4459fb You can stop drinking and still starve your marriage. You can stop scrolling and still starve your health. You can quit the thing that's hurting you and never start building the life you actually want. And then you wonder why you still feel empty.

In Episode 27 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles the principle that explains more about your life than almost anything else: what you feed grows, what you starve dies. But here's the part most people miss. It's not just about removing the bad. It's about what you're feeding (or failing to feed) in its place. Kari shares how a shoulder injury at the gym became the perfect metaphor for how we protect the very things we should be strengthening, and why removing a behavior without replacing it leaves you just as stuck as before.

She also digs into the neuroscience and scripture behind why we rehearse old resentments, how thoughts become behaviors, and the two questions that will change how you see your entire life.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The shoulder injury story that became a perfect metaphor for life

• Why protecting something too long actually starves it

• How resentment stays alive: you're feeding a 10-year-old event every time you replay it

• Three scriptures that changed how Kari handles her thought life (Philippians 4:8, Romans 12:2, 2 Corinthians 10:5)

• Why "taking thoughts captive" is the most practical spiritual tool you'll ever use

• How gray area drinkers feed the habit by negotiating with themselves

• Why the healthiest relationship with alcohol might be zero

• The danger of quitting one thing without building something in its place

• How you can fix one Core Four area while another one is dying

• The two questions to ask yourself this week: What am I feeding that I don't want to grow? What am I starving that I desperately want to grow?

If you've ever quit something and still felt empty, this episode explains why. And it shows you what to do about it.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're feeding something that's hurting you and where you're starving something that matters.

Download the Audit HERE https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

SCRIPTURE REFERENCED

Philippians 4:8 (think on what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, praiseworthy)

Romans 12:2 (transformed by the renewing of your mind)

2 Corinthians 10:5 (take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ)

—————

TOPICS COVERED

what you feed grows what you starve dies, gray area drinking, quit drinking now what, replacing habits, resentment and forgiveness, taking thoughts captive, Philippians 4:8, Romans 12:2, renewing your mind, Core Four, body being balance business, why you still feel empty, feeding vs starving, midlife change, high performers, marriage and drinking, spiritual health, thought life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode made you realize you've been starving something that matters, share it with someone who's been so focused on removing the bad that they forgot to build the good. That shift changes everything.

#WhatYouFeedGrows #WhatYouStarveDies #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #CoreFour #TakeThoughtsCaptive #Philippians48 #RenewYourMind #QuitDrinkingNowWhat #ReplacingHabits #Resentment #Forgiveness #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #FeedOrStarve #SpiritualHealth #IntentionalLiving

]]> You can stop drinking and still starve your marriage. You can stop scrolling and still starve your health. You can quit the thing that's hurting you and never start building the life you actually want. And then you wonder why you still feel empty.

In Episode 27 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles the principle that explains more about your life than almost anything else: what you feed grows, what you starve dies. But here's the part most people miss. It's not just about removing the bad. It's about what you're feeding (or failing to feed) in its place. Kari shares how a shoulder injury at the gym became the perfect metaphor for how we protect the very things we should be strengthening, and why removing a behavior without replacing it leaves you just as stuck as before.

She also digs into the neuroscience and scripture behind why we rehearse old resentments, how thoughts become behaviors, and the two questions that will change how you see your entire life.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The shoulder injury story that became a perfect metaphor for life

• Why protecting something too long actually starves it

• How resentment stays alive: you're feeding a 10-year-old event every time you replay it

• Three scriptures that changed how Kari handles her thought life (Philippians 4:8, Romans 12:2, 2 Corinthians 10:5)

• Why "taking thoughts captive" is the most practical spiritual tool you'll ever use

• How gray area drinkers feed the habit by negotiating with themselves

• Why the healthiest relationship with alcohol might be zero

• The danger of quitting one thing without building something in its place

• How you can fix one Core Four area while another one is dying

• The two questions to ask yourself this week: What am I feeding that I don't want to grow? What am I starving that I desperately want to grow?

If you've ever quit something and still felt empty, this episode explains why. And it shows you what to do about it.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're feeding something that's hurting you and where you're starving something that matters.

Download the Audit HERE https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

SCRIPTURE REFERENCED

Philippians 4:8 (think on what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, praiseworthy)

Romans 12:2 (transformed by the renewing of your mind)

2 Corinthians 10:5 (take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ)

—————

TOPICS COVERED

what you feed grows what you starve dies, gray area drinking, quit drinking now what, replacing habits, resentment and forgiveness, taking thoughts captive, Philippians 4:8, Romans 12:2, renewing your mind, Core Four, body being balance business, why you still feel empty, feeding vs starving, midlife change, high performers, marriage and drinking, spiritual health, thought life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode made you realize you've been starving something that matters, share it with someone who's been so focused on removing the bad that they forgot to build the good. That shift changes everything.

#WhatYouFeedGrows #WhatYouStarveDies #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #CoreFour #TakeThoughtsCaptive #Philippians48 #RenewYourMind #QuitDrinkingNowWhat #ReplacingHabits #Resentment #Forgiveness #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #FeedOrStarve #SpiritualHealth #IntentionalLiving

]]> Tue, 18 Aug 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1070 You can stop drinking and still starve your marriage. You can stop scrolling and still starve your health. You can quit the thing that's hurting you and never start building the life you actually want. And then you wonder why you still feel empty.

In Episode 27 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles the principle that explains more about your life than almost anything else: what you feed grows, what you starve dies. But here's the part most people miss. It's not just about removing the bad. It's about what you're feeding (or failing to feed) in its place. Kari shares how a shoulder injury at the gym became the perfect metaphor for how we protect the very things we should be strengthening, and why removing a behavior without replacing it leaves you just as stuck as before.

She also digs into the neuroscience and scripture behind why we rehearse old resentments, how thoughts become behaviors, and the two questions that will change how you see your entire life.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The shoulder injury story that became a perfect metaphor for life

• Why protecting something too long actually starves it

• How resentment stays alive: you're feeding a 10-year-old event every time you replay it

• Three scriptures that changed how Kari handles her thought life (Philippians 4:8, Romans 12:2, 2 Corinthians 10:5)

• Why "taking thoughts captive" is the most practical spiritual tool you'll ever use

• How gray area drinkers feed the habit by negotiating with themselves

• Why the healthiest relationship with alcohol might be zero

• The danger of quitting one thing without building something in its place

• How you can fix one Core Four area while another one is dying

• The two questions to ask yourself this week: What am I feeding that I don't want to grow? What am I starving that I desperately want to grow?

If you've ever quit something and still felt empty, this episode explains why. And it shows you what to do about it.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're feeding something that's hurting you and where you're starving something that matters.

Download the Audit HERE https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

SCRIPTURE REFERENCED

Philippians 4:8 (think on what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, praiseworthy)

Romans 12:2 (transformed by the renewing of your mind)

2 Corinthians 10:5 (take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ)

—————

TOPICS COVERED

what you feed grows what you starve dies, gray area drinking, quit drinking now what, replacing habits, resentment and forgiveness, taking thoughts captive, Philippians 4:8, Romans 12:2, renewing your mind, Core Four, body being balance business, why you still feel empty, feeding vs starving, midlife change, high performers, marriage and drinking, spiritual health, thought life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode made you realize you've been starving something that matters, share it with someone who's been so focused on removing the bad that they forgot to build the good. That shift changes everything.

#WhatYouFeedGrows #WhatYouStarveDies #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #CoreFour #TakeThoughtsCaptive #Philippians48 #RenewYourMind #QuitDrinkingNowWhat #ReplacingHabits #Resentment #Forgiveness #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #FeedOrStarve #SpiritualHealth #IntentionalLiving

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No I'm Not Training for 60. I'm Training for 70. | Project 60 Officially Begins! | Ep. 26 26 26 I'm Not Training for 60. I'm Training for 70. | Project 60 Officially Begins! | Ep. 26 full 40a00fb8-ec9f-44f8-8113-3d19743f0b4c https://share.transistor.fm/s/ce5a4b95 I turn 60 in less than six months. And I made a decision: I'm not arriving there by accident. I'm not interested in a party or a trip. I'm interested in who I get to be when I get there. And more importantly, who I'm going to be in the decade that follows. Because I'm not training for 60. I'm training for 70.

In Episode 26 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear introduces Project 60: a six-month personal commitment to arrive at her 60th birthday with intention across all four Core Four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. She shares where she's starting, what she's doing, and what she's already noticing just weeks in. This isn't a resolution. It's stewardship. And it's an open invitation for you to build your own version, no matter what age you are.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why Kari is training for 70, not 60, and how that reframed everything

• The real mission behind Project 60: stewardship, not vanity

• Her physical plan: strength training, clean eating, tracking, and a 10-pound goal

• What comprehensive labs through Function Health revealed (and why she recommends it)

• Carrying the APOE4 gene on both sides and what she's doing about it

• Why sleep is the area she's taking more seriously than ever before

• Her spiritual plan: two Bible studies, journaling, and praying before everything

• "Peace changes your face more than any makeup ever will"

• How she's investing in her marriage and relationships with more intentionality

• Kingdom Impact Network, GrayTonic, and the calling that drives her business

• What she's already noticing: autopilot, self-negotiation, and going through the motions

• Why awareness is the biggest gift and why you can't unsee it once you do

• The Saturday updates: one lesson per week between now and January 16th

This isn't just Kari's journey. It's an invitation. What's your version of Project 60?

—————

FOLLOW PROJECT 60

Every Saturday between now and January 16th, Kari shares one update and one lesson on LinkedIn and Facebook. Follow along and start your own version.

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

—————

FREE RESOURCE
Ready to discover your gray areas? Take the FREE Audit.
Let's get real and discovery your facts. Download HERE:
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/


—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Function Health (comprehensive labs by Dr. Mark Hyman): functionhealth.com

Book: Experiencing God

Kingdom Impact Network: kingdomimpact.network

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 4: When One Partner Changes and the Other Doesn't (with Rob)

Episode 8: Why Couples Drift Apart and How to Reconnect (with Rob)

Episode 10: Still Waking Up at 3AM? (with Morgan Adams)

—————

TOPICS COVERED

Project 60, turning 60, training for 70, milestone birthday intention, Core Four, body being balance business, strength training over 50, APOE4 gene Alzheimer's prevention, Function Health labs, sleep optimization, spiritual health, prayer and journaling, Bible study, marriage after 50, stewardship, intentional living, awareness, autopilot life, midlife health, Kingdom Impact Network, GrayTonic, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, aging well, women over 50, men over 50, retirement

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you're standing at your own crossroads and you don't want to slide into the next decade by accident, start your own version of Project 60. Name it. Commit to it. And follow along with Kari every Saturday.

#Project60 #TrainingFor70 #TurningS60 #IntentionalLiving #CoreFour #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #Stewardship #APOE4 #AlzheimersPrevention #StrengthTrainingOver50 #SpiritualHealth #MidlifeHealth #AgingWell #FaithAndFitness #MarriageAfter50 #Awareness #DontArriveByAccident #WomenOver50

]]> I turn 60 in less than six months. And I made a decision: I'm not arriving there by accident. I'm not interested in a party or a trip. I'm interested in who I get to be when I get there. And more importantly, who I'm going to be in the decade that follows. Because I'm not training for 60. I'm training for 70.

In Episode 26 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear introduces Project 60: a six-month personal commitment to arrive at her 60th birthday with intention across all four Core Four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. She shares where she's starting, what she's doing, and what she's already noticing just weeks in. This isn't a resolution. It's stewardship. And it's an open invitation for you to build your own version, no matter what age you are.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why Kari is training for 70, not 60, and how that reframed everything

• The real mission behind Project 60: stewardship, not vanity

• Her physical plan: strength training, clean eating, tracking, and a 10-pound goal

• What comprehensive labs through Function Health revealed (and why she recommends it)

• Carrying the APOE4 gene on both sides and what she's doing about it

• Why sleep is the area she's taking more seriously than ever before

• Her spiritual plan: two Bible studies, journaling, and praying before everything

• "Peace changes your face more than any makeup ever will"

• How she's investing in her marriage and relationships with more intentionality

• Kingdom Impact Network, GrayTonic, and the calling that drives her business

• What she's already noticing: autopilot, self-negotiation, and going through the motions

• Why awareness is the biggest gift and why you can't unsee it once you do

• The Saturday updates: one lesson per week between now and January 16th

This isn't just Kari's journey. It's an invitation. What's your version of Project 60?

—————

FOLLOW PROJECT 60

Every Saturday between now and January 16th, Kari shares one update and one lesson on LinkedIn and Facebook. Follow along and start your own version.

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

—————

FREE RESOURCE
Ready to discover your gray areas? Take the FREE Audit.
Let's get real and discovery your facts. Download HERE:
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/


—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Function Health (comprehensive labs by Dr. Mark Hyman): functionhealth.com

Book: Experiencing God

Kingdom Impact Network: kingdomimpact.network

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 4: When One Partner Changes and the Other Doesn't (with Rob)

Episode 8: Why Couples Drift Apart and How to Reconnect (with Rob)

Episode 10: Still Waking Up at 3AM? (with Morgan Adams)

—————

TOPICS COVERED

Project 60, turning 60, training for 70, milestone birthday intention, Core Four, body being balance business, strength training over 50, APOE4 gene Alzheimer's prevention, Function Health labs, sleep optimization, spiritual health, prayer and journaling, Bible study, marriage after 50, stewardship, intentional living, awareness, autopilot life, midlife health, Kingdom Impact Network, GrayTonic, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, aging well, women over 50, men over 50, retirement

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you're standing at your own crossroads and you don't want to slide into the next decade by accident, start your own version of Project 60. Name it. Commit to it. And follow along with Kari every Saturday.

#Project60 #TrainingFor70 #TurningS60 #IntentionalLiving #CoreFour #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #Stewardship #APOE4 #AlzheimersPrevention #StrengthTrainingOver50 #SpiritualHealth #MidlifeHealth #AgingWell #FaithAndFitness #MarriageAfter50 #Awareness #DontArriveByAccident #WomenOver50

]]> Tue, 11 Aug 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1257 I turn 60 in less than six months. And I made a decision: I'm not arriving there by accident. I'm not interested in a party or a trip. I'm interested in who I get to be when I get there. And more importantly, who I'm going to be in the decade that follows. Because I'm not training for 60. I'm training for 70.

In Episode 26 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear introduces Project 60: a six-month personal commitment to arrive at her 60th birthday with intention across all four Core Four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. She shares where she's starting, what she's doing, and what she's already noticing just weeks in. This isn't a resolution. It's stewardship. And it's an open invitation for you to build your own version, no matter what age you are.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why Kari is training for 70, not 60, and how that reframed everything

• The real mission behind Project 60: stewardship, not vanity

• Her physical plan: strength training, clean eating, tracking, and a 10-pound goal

• What comprehensive labs through Function Health revealed (and why she recommends it)

• Carrying the APOE4 gene on both sides and what she's doing about it

• Why sleep is the area she's taking more seriously than ever before

• Her spiritual plan: two Bible studies, journaling, and praying before everything

• "Peace changes your face more than any makeup ever will"

• How she's investing in her marriage and relationships with more intentionality

• Kingdom Impact Network, GrayTonic, and the calling that drives her business

• What she's already noticing: autopilot, self-negotiation, and going through the motions

• Why awareness is the biggest gift and why you can't unsee it once you do

• The Saturday updates: one lesson per week between now and January 16th

This isn't just Kari's journey. It's an invitation. What's your version of Project 60?

—————

FOLLOW PROJECT 60

Every Saturday between now and January 16th, Kari shares one update and one lesson on LinkedIn and Facebook. Follow along and start your own version.

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

—————

FREE RESOURCE
Ready to discover your gray areas? Take the FREE Audit.
Let's get real and discovery your facts. Download HERE:
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/


—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Function Health (comprehensive labs by Dr. Mark Hyman): functionhealth.com

Book: Experiencing God

Kingdom Impact Network: kingdomimpact.network

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 4: When One Partner Changes and the Other Doesn't (with Rob)

Episode 8: Why Couples Drift Apart and How to Reconnect (with Rob)

Episode 10: Still Waking Up at 3AM? (with Morgan Adams)

—————

TOPICS COVERED

Project 60, turning 60, training for 70, milestone birthday intention, Core Four, body being balance business, strength training over 50, APOE4 gene Alzheimer's prevention, Function Health labs, sleep optimization, spiritual health, prayer and journaling, Bible study, marriage after 50, stewardship, intentional living, awareness, autopilot life, midlife health, Kingdom Impact Network, GrayTonic, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, aging well, women over 50, men over 50, retirement

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you're standing at your own crossroads and you don't want to slide into the next decade by accident, start your own version of Project 60. Name it. Commit to it. And follow along with Kari every Saturday.

#Project60 #TrainingFor70 #TurningS60 #IntentionalLiving #CoreFour #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #Stewardship #APOE4 #AlzheimersPrevention #StrengthTrainingOver50 #SpiritualHealth #MidlifeHealth #AgingWell #FaithAndFitness #MarriageAfter50 #Awareness #DontArriveByAccident #WomenOver50

]]> Project 60, turning 60, training for 70, milestone birthday intention, Core Four, body being balance business, strength training over 50, APOE4 gene Alzheimer's prevention, Function Health labs, sleep optimization, spiritual health, prayer and journaling, Bible study, marriage after 50, stewardship, intentional living, awareness, autopilot life, midlife health, Kingdom Impact Network, GrayTonic, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, aging well, women over 50, men over 50, turning 60, retirement age, next decade No 25 Hard Truths I Learned the Hard Way | No Frameworks. Just Honesty. | Ep. 25 25 25 25 Hard Truths I Learned the Hard Way | No Frameworks. Just Honesty. | Ep. 25 full 067f05ca-e8c2-4a0a-beec-24c8ef4ae246 https://share.transistor.fm/s/5a0b23c1 No frameworks today. No five-step method. No guest. Just 25 hard truths in 25 minutes from almost 10 years of living alcohol-free and thousands of coaching conversations. At least one of these is going to follow you around for the rest of the week.

In Episode 25 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear does something completely different. She drops 25 truths she's learned the hard way, one per minute, covering everything from drinking and identity to faith, marriage, loneliness, and why the most successful people are often the most empty. Some of these will make you uncomfortable. Some might make you laugh. All of them are honest.

The 25 Truths:

1. You're not hiding it as well as you think

2. You don't have a drinking problem, you have a peace problem

3. Healing starts with honesty, not confidence

4. Information has never changed your life, decisions have

5. Comparison is the cheapest excuse for staying stuck

6. The strongest people I know are willing to cry

7. Most men over 50 haven't had an honest conversation in years

8. Success doesn't solve misalignment

9. The day I stopped waiting for someone else to change my life is when my life changed

10. The best decision I ever made was the scariest one

11. Alcohol wasn't the hardest thing I gave up, identity was

12. If your morning routine takes two hours, you might be avoiding your life

13. You spend more on your car than your health

14. Prayer is the most underused resource in my life

15. People misrepresent God

16. Your calendar tells the truth about your priorities

17. The people who need help most are the best at hiding it

18. No client has ever regretted making a courageous change

19. Action creates clarity, waiting creates doubt

20. Your kids are still watching, even if they're grown

21. You can be grateful and still want more

22. You can't heal the life you're still hiding

23. Peace begins where pretending ends

24. God invited me to become who He created me to be

25. There is life beyond the gray

Bonus #26: You don't have to change everything today. You just have to stop pretending nothing needs to change.

Which one hit you the hardest? Drop it in the comments.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free, one-page PDF with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)

Download HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

If one of these truths stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

25 hard truths, gray area drinking, quit drinking, peace problem not drinking problem, identity shift, men over 50, honest conversations, success and emptiness, church hurt, prayer, vulnerability, comparison trap, morning routine, health is wealth, action before feeling, kids are watching, alcohol-free, midlife change, faith and sobriety, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, high performers, DECIDE Method

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If one of these 25 truths hit you, share this episode with someone who needs to hear it too. Sometimes one truth is all it takes.

#25HardTruths #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #GrayAreaDrinking #PeaceProblem #IdentityShift #MenOver50 #HonestConversations #ChurchHurt #PrayerWorks #VulnerabilityIsStrength #ComparisonTrap #HealthIsWealth #ActionCreatesClarity #KidsAreWatching #AlcoholFree #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #StopPretending

]]> No frameworks today. No five-step method. No guest. Just 25 hard truths in 25 minutes from almost 10 years of living alcohol-free and thousands of coaching conversations. At least one of these is going to follow you around for the rest of the week.

In Episode 25 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear does something completely different. She drops 25 truths she's learned the hard way, one per minute, covering everything from drinking and identity to faith, marriage, loneliness, and why the most successful people are often the most empty. Some of these will make you uncomfortable. Some might make you laugh. All of them are honest.

The 25 Truths:

1. You're not hiding it as well as you think

2. You don't have a drinking problem, you have a peace problem

3. Healing starts with honesty, not confidence

4. Information has never changed your life, decisions have

5. Comparison is the cheapest excuse for staying stuck

6. The strongest people I know are willing to cry

7. Most men over 50 haven't had an honest conversation in years

8. Success doesn't solve misalignment

9. The day I stopped waiting for someone else to change my life is when my life changed

10. The best decision I ever made was the scariest one

11. Alcohol wasn't the hardest thing I gave up, identity was

12. If your morning routine takes two hours, you might be avoiding your life

13. You spend more on your car than your health

14. Prayer is the most underused resource in my life

15. People misrepresent God

16. Your calendar tells the truth about your priorities

17. The people who need help most are the best at hiding it

18. No client has ever regretted making a courageous change

19. Action creates clarity, waiting creates doubt

20. Your kids are still watching, even if they're grown

21. You can be grateful and still want more

22. You can't heal the life you're still hiding

23. Peace begins where pretending ends

24. God invited me to become who He created me to be

25. There is life beyond the gray

Bonus #26: You don't have to change everything today. You just have to stop pretending nothing needs to change.

Which one hit you the hardest? Drop it in the comments.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free, one-page PDF with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)

Download HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

If one of these truths stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

25 hard truths, gray area drinking, quit drinking, peace problem not drinking problem, identity shift, men over 50, honest conversations, success and emptiness, church hurt, prayer, vulnerability, comparison trap, morning routine, health is wealth, action before feeling, kids are watching, alcohol-free, midlife change, faith and sobriety, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, high performers, DECIDE Method

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If one of these 25 truths hit you, share this episode with someone who needs to hear it too. Sometimes one truth is all it takes.

#25HardTruths #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #GrayAreaDrinking #PeaceProblem #IdentityShift #MenOver50 #HonestConversations #ChurchHurt #PrayerWorks #VulnerabilityIsStrength #ComparisonTrap #HealthIsWealth #ActionCreatesClarity #KidsAreWatching #AlcoholFree #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #StopPretending

]]> Tue, 04 Aug 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1608 No frameworks today. No five-step method. No guest. Just 25 hard truths in 25 minutes from almost 10 years of living alcohol-free and thousands of coaching conversations. At least one of these is going to follow you around for the rest of the week.

In Episode 25 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear does something completely different. She drops 25 truths she's learned the hard way, one per minute, covering everything from drinking and identity to faith, marriage, loneliness, and why the most successful people are often the most empty. Some of these will make you uncomfortable. Some might make you laugh. All of them are honest.

The 25 Truths:

1. You're not hiding it as well as you think

2. You don't have a drinking problem, you have a peace problem

3. Healing starts with honesty, not confidence

4. Information has never changed your life, decisions have

5. Comparison is the cheapest excuse for staying stuck

6. The strongest people I know are willing to cry

7. Most men over 50 haven't had an honest conversation in years

8. Success doesn't solve misalignment

9. The day I stopped waiting for someone else to change my life is when my life changed

10. The best decision I ever made was the scariest one

11. Alcohol wasn't the hardest thing I gave up, identity was

12. If your morning routine takes two hours, you might be avoiding your life

13. You spend more on your car than your health

14. Prayer is the most underused resource in my life

15. People misrepresent God

16. Your calendar tells the truth about your priorities

17. The people who need help most are the best at hiding it

18. No client has ever regretted making a courageous change

19. Action creates clarity, waiting creates doubt

20. Your kids are still watching, even if they're grown

21. You can be grateful and still want more

22. You can't heal the life you're still hiding

23. Peace begins where pretending ends

24. God invited me to become who He created me to be

25. There is life beyond the gray

Bonus #26: You don't have to change everything today. You just have to stop pretending nothing needs to change.

Which one hit you the hardest? Drop it in the comments.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free, one-page PDF with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)

Download HERE

—————

READY TO TALK?

If one of these truths stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

25 hard truths, gray area drinking, quit drinking, peace problem not drinking problem, identity shift, men over 50, honest conversations, success and emptiness, church hurt, prayer, vulnerability, comparison trap, morning routine, health is wealth, action before feeling, kids are watching, alcohol-free, midlife change, faith and sobriety, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, high performers, DECIDE Method

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If one of these 25 truths hit you, share this episode with someone who needs to hear it too. Sometimes one truth is all it takes.

#25HardTruths #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #GrayAreaDrinking #PeaceProblem #IdentityShift #MenOver50 #HonestConversations #ChurchHurt #PrayerWorks #VulnerabilityIsStrength #ComparisonTrap #HealthIsWealth #ActionCreatesClarity #KidsAreWatching #AlcoholFree #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #StopPretending

]]> 25 hard truths, gray area drinking, quit drinking, peace problem not drinking problem, identity shift, men over 50, honest conversations, success and emptiness, church hurt, prayer, vulnerability, comparison trap, morning routine, health is wealth, action before feeling, kids are watching, alcohol-free, midlife change, faith and sobriety, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, high performers, DECIDE Method No One Decision Won't Change Your Life. Thousands of Small Ones Will. (Part Two) | Ep. 24 24 24 One Decision Won't Change Your Life. Thousands of Small Ones Will. (Part Two) | Ep. 24 full a1a065e4-a070-4dd9-8e0d-37fe39eb4485 https://share.transistor.fm/s/6300d440 You made the decision. You committed. You know your why. And then you woke up the next morning in the same house, with the same spouse, the same job, the same stress, and the same habits trying to pull you back. Now what?

In Episode 24 of Beyond the Gray (Part 2 of 2), Kari Schwear tackles the part nobody talks about: what happens after the decision. Because the hardest part isn't saying "I'm done." The hardest part is living like someone who is done. This episode is about identity, the uncomfortable middle, and why feeling awkward is actually proof that you're growing, not failing.

Kari shares how she built an entire identity around wine (including starting a neighborhood wine club), why quitting felt like burying a best friend, and the daily habits that slowly rebuilt who she was from the inside out. She also introduces the "floor vs. ceiling" concept and the one question that changed every decision she made from that point forward.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why making a decision doesn't magically make you a different person

• The "uncomfortable middle" and why this is where most people quit

• How Kari built an entire identity around wine and what it felt like to let that go

• Why feeling awkward or fake isn't proof that you're failing, it's proof that you're changing

• The order that actually works: action builds belief, belief builds identity, identity builds consistency

• Why nature doesn't like a vacuum and what to replace your habit with

• Tonic water, walks, books, and prayer: the replacements that saved Kari's sobriety

• The "floor vs. ceiling" concept for daily habits (and why your floor matters more)

• The one question that changed everything: "Is this a vote for my future or my past?"

• Why one decision doesn't change your life, but thousands of small ones will

If you made a commitment in Part 1 and you're wondering what comes next, this is it. This is how you become the person your change requires.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free, one-page PDF with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)

CLICK HERE FOR THE 28 TOOLS RESOURCE (link)

—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 23: Why Your Changes Never Stick (Part 1 of 2)

Episode 3: The Identity Shift

Episode 11: Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic

Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking Explained

—————


New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who made a change and then drifted back, send them both parts. Part 1 is the foundation. Part 2 is who you become. Together, they're the roadmap.

#WhoAreYouBecoming #IdentityShift #LastingChange #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FloorVsCeiling #VoteForYourFuture #QuitDrinking #UncomfortableMiddle #DailyHabits #ActionBeforeFeeling #SoberCurious #HighPerformers #MidlifeChange #Part2of2 #AlcoholFreeIdentity

]]> You made the decision. You committed. You know your why. And then you woke up the next morning in the same house, with the same spouse, the same job, the same stress, and the same habits trying to pull you back. Now what?

In Episode 24 of Beyond the Gray (Part 2 of 2), Kari Schwear tackles the part nobody talks about: what happens after the decision. Because the hardest part isn't saying "I'm done." The hardest part is living like someone who is done. This episode is about identity, the uncomfortable middle, and why feeling awkward is actually proof that you're growing, not failing.

Kari shares how she built an entire identity around wine (including starting a neighborhood wine club), why quitting felt like burying a best friend, and the daily habits that slowly rebuilt who she was from the inside out. She also introduces the "floor vs. ceiling" concept and the one question that changed every decision she made from that point forward.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why making a decision doesn't magically make you a different person

• The "uncomfortable middle" and why this is where most people quit

• How Kari built an entire identity around wine and what it felt like to let that go

• Why feeling awkward or fake isn't proof that you're failing, it's proof that you're changing

• The order that actually works: action builds belief, belief builds identity, identity builds consistency

• Why nature doesn't like a vacuum and what to replace your habit with

• Tonic water, walks, books, and prayer: the replacements that saved Kari's sobriety

• The "floor vs. ceiling" concept for daily habits (and why your floor matters more)

• The one question that changed everything: "Is this a vote for my future or my past?"

• Why one decision doesn't change your life, but thousands of small ones will

If you made a commitment in Part 1 and you're wondering what comes next, this is it. This is how you become the person your change requires.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free, one-page PDF with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)

CLICK HERE FOR THE 28 TOOLS RESOURCE (link)

—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 23: Why Your Changes Never Stick (Part 1 of 2)

Episode 3: The Identity Shift

Episode 11: Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic

Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking Explained

—————


New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who made a change and then drifted back, send them both parts. Part 1 is the foundation. Part 2 is who you become. Together, they're the roadmap.

#WhoAreYouBecoming #IdentityShift #LastingChange #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FloorVsCeiling #VoteForYourFuture #QuitDrinking #UncomfortableMiddle #DailyHabits #ActionBeforeFeeling #SoberCurious #HighPerformers #MidlifeChange #Part2of2 #AlcoholFreeIdentity

]]> Tue, 28 Jul 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1350 You made the decision. You committed. You know your why. And then you woke up the next morning in the same house, with the same spouse, the same job, the same stress, and the same habits trying to pull you back. Now what?

In Episode 24 of Beyond the Gray (Part 2 of 2), Kari Schwear tackles the part nobody talks about: what happens after the decision. Because the hardest part isn't saying "I'm done." The hardest part is living like someone who is done. This episode is about identity, the uncomfortable middle, and why feeling awkward is actually proof that you're growing, not failing.

Kari shares how she built an entire identity around wine (including starting a neighborhood wine club), why quitting felt like burying a best friend, and the daily habits that slowly rebuilt who she was from the inside out. She also introduces the "floor vs. ceiling" concept and the one question that changed every decision she made from that point forward.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why making a decision doesn't magically make you a different person

• The "uncomfortable middle" and why this is where most people quit

• How Kari built an entire identity around wine and what it felt like to let that go

• Why feeling awkward or fake isn't proof that you're failing, it's proof that you're changing

• The order that actually works: action builds belief, belief builds identity, identity builds consistency

• Why nature doesn't like a vacuum and what to replace your habit with

• Tonic water, walks, books, and prayer: the replacements that saved Kari's sobriety

• The "floor vs. ceiling" concept for daily habits (and why your floor matters more)

• The one question that changed everything: "Is this a vote for my future or my past?"

• Why one decision doesn't change your life, but thousands of small ones will

If you made a commitment in Part 1 and you're wondering what comes next, this is it. This is how you become the person your change requires.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free, one-page PDF with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)

CLICK HERE FOR THE 28 TOOLS RESOURCE (link)

—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 23: Why Your Changes Never Stick (Part 1 of 2)

Episode 3: The Identity Shift

Episode 11: Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic

Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking Explained

—————


New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who made a change and then drifted back, send them both parts. Part 1 is the foundation. Part 2 is who you become. Together, they're the roadmap.

#WhoAreYouBecoming #IdentityShift #LastingChange #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FloorVsCeiling #VoteForYourFuture #QuitDrinking #UncomfortableMiddle #DailyHabits #ActionBeforeFeeling #SoberCurious #HighPerformers #MidlifeChange #Part2of2 #AlcoholFreeIdentity

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No Why You Keep Going Back To Your Comfort Zone | DECIDE Part One | Ep. 23 23 23 Why You Keep Going Back To Your Comfort Zone | DECIDE Part One | Ep. 23 full f487a3dd-d556-42bc-9f7a-4bc439cbe232 https://share.transistor.fm/s/48b0a470 You've tried to change before. Maybe it lasted 30 days. Maybe 90. Maybe even a year. And then you went right back. And the worst part wasn't the behavior. It was the voice in your head that said, "See? You can't do this."

In Episode 23 of Beyond the Gray (Part 1 of 2), Kari Schwear breaks down why lasting change fails for most people and what actually makes it stick. She shares what she's never said publicly before: the nights she woke up outside sleepwalking, the mirror moment at 2am with two bottles of wine, and the promise she made to God on August 15th, 2016 that changed everything. This isn't motivation. This is the foundation. The psychology, the framework, and the exercises you need before anything else will work.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why change fails even when you want it badly (and why willpower isn't the problem)

• The "checkbox" concept: how small moments compound into the one that finally breaks through

• Stories Kari has never shared publicly: the sleepwalking, the blackouts, the confusion

• The mirror moment at 2am that became the turning point

• The pros and cons list exercise that made the choice obvious

• "Reasons to stay equaled comfort. Reasons to leave equaled my soul."

• The "Five Whys" exercise: how to go five layers deep to find the why that actually holds

• Why a surface-level why ("I want to be healthier") will never survive a craving

• What AA got right: the white chip, one day at a time, and the power of commitment

• Why Kari still doesn't say "I'll never drink again" and what she says instead

• Three exercises to try this week before Part 2 drops

This is Part 1. Next week in Part 2, we go deeper into identity, daily habits, and how to actually become who you've committed to becoming. This is the DECIDE Method. Don't miss it.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free PDF (via Google Drive link), with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)
YES! I WANT THE FREE GUIDE!


—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 22: You Don't Need a Rock Bottom. You Need Your Own Enough.

Episode 11: Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic

Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking Explained

—————

TOPICS COVERED

why change doesn't last, lasting change psychology, gray area drinking, quit drinking, how to stop drinking, willpower myth, five whys exercise, pros and cons quitting drinking, rock bottom myth, midlife change, high performers and alcohol, identity and change, AA white chip, one day at a time, commitment vs motivation, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, sober curious, alcohol-free, numbing behavior, THC and alcohol, checkboxes of change

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss Part 2 next week.

If you've ever made a change that didn't stick, share this with someone who needs to hear why. Sometimes the missing piece isn't motivation. It's the foundation underneath it.

#WhyChangeFails #LastingChange #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FiveWhys #QuitDrinking #RockBottomMyth #IdentityShift #SoberCurious #HighPerformers #OneDay AtATime #CommitmentOverMotivation #MidlifeChange #AlcoholFree #Part1of2


]]> You've tried to change before. Maybe it lasted 30 days. Maybe 90. Maybe even a year. And then you went right back. And the worst part wasn't the behavior. It was the voice in your head that said, "See? You can't do this."

In Episode 23 of Beyond the Gray (Part 1 of 2), Kari Schwear breaks down why lasting change fails for most people and what actually makes it stick. She shares what she's never said publicly before: the nights she woke up outside sleepwalking, the mirror moment at 2am with two bottles of wine, and the promise she made to God on August 15th, 2016 that changed everything. This isn't motivation. This is the foundation. The psychology, the framework, and the exercises you need before anything else will work.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why change fails even when you want it badly (and why willpower isn't the problem)

• The "checkbox" concept: how small moments compound into the one that finally breaks through

• Stories Kari has never shared publicly: the sleepwalking, the blackouts, the confusion

• The mirror moment at 2am that became the turning point

• The pros and cons list exercise that made the choice obvious

• "Reasons to stay equaled comfort. Reasons to leave equaled my soul."

• The "Five Whys" exercise: how to go five layers deep to find the why that actually holds

• Why a surface-level why ("I want to be healthier") will never survive a craving

• What AA got right: the white chip, one day at a time, and the power of commitment

• Why Kari still doesn't say "I'll never drink again" and what she says instead

• Three exercises to try this week before Part 2 drops

This is Part 1. Next week in Part 2, we go deeper into identity, daily habits, and how to actually become who you've committed to becoming. This is the DECIDE Method. Don't miss it.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free PDF (via Google Drive link), with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)
YES! I WANT THE FREE GUIDE!


—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 22: You Don't Need a Rock Bottom. You Need Your Own Enough.

Episode 11: Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic

Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking Explained

—————

TOPICS COVERED

why change doesn't last, lasting change psychology, gray area drinking, quit drinking, how to stop drinking, willpower myth, five whys exercise, pros and cons quitting drinking, rock bottom myth, midlife change, high performers and alcohol, identity and change, AA white chip, one day at a time, commitment vs motivation, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, sober curious, alcohol-free, numbing behavior, THC and alcohol, checkboxes of change

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss Part 2 next week.

If you've ever made a change that didn't stick, share this with someone who needs to hear why. Sometimes the missing piece isn't motivation. It's the foundation underneath it.

#WhyChangeFails #LastingChange #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FiveWhys #QuitDrinking #RockBottomMyth #IdentityShift #SoberCurious #HighPerformers #OneDay AtATime #CommitmentOverMotivation #MidlifeChange #AlcoholFree #Part1of2


]]> Tue, 21 Jul 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1488 You've tried to change before. Maybe it lasted 30 days. Maybe 90. Maybe even a year. And then you went right back. And the worst part wasn't the behavior. It was the voice in your head that said, "See? You can't do this."

In Episode 23 of Beyond the Gray (Part 1 of 2), Kari Schwear breaks down why lasting change fails for most people and what actually makes it stick. She shares what she's never said publicly before: the nights she woke up outside sleepwalking, the mirror moment at 2am with two bottles of wine, and the promise she made to God on August 15th, 2016 that changed everything. This isn't motivation. This is the foundation. The psychology, the framework, and the exercises you need before anything else will work.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why change fails even when you want it badly (and why willpower isn't the problem)

• The "checkbox" concept: how small moments compound into the one that finally breaks through

• Stories Kari has never shared publicly: the sleepwalking, the blackouts, the confusion

• The mirror moment at 2am that became the turning point

• The pros and cons list exercise that made the choice obvious

• "Reasons to stay equaled comfort. Reasons to leave equaled my soul."

• The "Five Whys" exercise: how to go five layers deep to find the why that actually holds

• Why a surface-level why ("I want to be healthier") will never survive a craving

• What AA got right: the white chip, one day at a time, and the power of commitment

• Why Kari still doesn't say "I'll never drink again" and what she says instead

• Three exercises to try this week before Part 2 drops

This is Part 1. Next week in Part 2, we go deeper into identity, daily habits, and how to actually become who you've committed to becoming. This is the DECIDE Method. Don't miss it.

—————

FREE RESOURCE

28 Tools for Questioning the Drink: a free PDF (via Google Drive link), with practical tools you can use today. No judgment. No shame. Just real tools that work. (Works for any habit, not just drinking.)
YES! I WANT THE FREE GUIDE!


—————

READY TO TALK?

If this episode stirred something and you want to have an honest conversation about where you are and where you want to go, no pressure, no sales pitch, no judgment, just book a call.

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 22: You Don't Need a Rock Bottom. You Need Your Own Enough.

Episode 11: Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic

Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking Explained

—————

TOPICS COVERED

why change doesn't last, lasting change psychology, gray area drinking, quit drinking, how to stop drinking, willpower myth, five whys exercise, pros and cons quitting drinking, rock bottom myth, midlife change, high performers and alcohol, identity and change, AA white chip, one day at a time, commitment vs motivation, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, sober curious, alcohol-free, numbing behavior, THC and alcohol, checkboxes of change

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss Part 2 next week.

If you've ever made a change that didn't stick, share this with someone who needs to hear why. Sometimes the missing piece isn't motivation. It's the foundation underneath it.

#WhyChangeFails #LastingChange #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FiveWhys #QuitDrinking #RockBottomMyth #IdentityShift #SoberCurious #HighPerformers #OneDay AtATime #CommitmentOverMotivation #MidlifeChange #AlcoholFree #Part1of2


]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No You Don't Need a Rock Bottom - You Need Your Own Enough | Ep. 22 22 22 You Don't Need a Rock Bottom - You Need Your Own Enough | Ep. 22 full 49eae7c4-54d1-4584-8b40-e90eb607d09c https://share.transistor.fm/s/154f7cd3 Jumping into a pool in my bra and underwear at a 4th of July party wasn't enough. Passing out on my husband's shoulder five minutes into a Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga concert we'd waited eight months for wasn't enough. Saying a cuss word in front of 700 people with their heads bowed in prayer at my husband's work event wasn't enough. But telling my then 23-year-old son to go blank himself while blacked out? That was enough. And I still remember his face the next morning when he told me what I'd said.

In Episode 22 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear gets raw about the moments that weren't enough, the one that finally was, and why the difference had everything to do with identity. This episode isn't just about alcohol. It's about why intelligent, successful people stay stuck long after they know something needs to change, and how to choose your own "enough" before life chooses it for you.

Kari also shares three client stories of "enough" moments: the business trip that went too far, the wife who finally walked out, and the doctor who delivered news that couldn't be ignored. Every person's enough is different. The question is whether you'll choose yours or wait for it to choose you.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The three embarrassing stories that still weren't enough for Kari to change

• The one moment that was, and why it hit differently than all the others

• Why none of those earlier moments changed her identity, but the night with her son did

• The neuroscience behind why our brains prefer unhealthy familiar over healthy unfamiliar

• Why you keep comparing yourself to people who are worse off instead of people who are healthy

• Three real client stories of "enough" moments: the business trip, the packed bag, the doctor's warning

• Why most people aren't waiting for rock bottom, they're waiting for certainty

• The leadership parallel: why leaders pivot fast in business but wait years in their personal lives

• How the seed of change works, and why it took Kari two years of seeds before she acted

• Questions to sit with this week that might help you find your own enough

If you've been thinking about something you know needs to change but you keep telling yourself "it's not that bad," this episode is going to hold up a mirror. And maybe today is your enough.

—————
FREE RESOURCES
👇

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT -Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Download the free pocket-sized field guide of 28 practical tools men can reach for the moment they're tempted to drink, the days they're trying to build differently, and the deeper identity questions underneath both.
👉 28 Tools: Question the Drink


Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇
https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 9: "Am I Drinking Too Much?" (Stages of Change)

Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking Explained

—————

TOPICS COVERED

rock bottom myth, you don't need a rock bottom, gray area drinking, enough moment, why people stay stuck, identity and change, choosing to change, midlife change, quit drinking story, embarrassing drunk stories, high performers and alcohol, brain and habits, neuroscience of change, comparing yourself to others, seed of change, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, agency and change, personal leadership, gray area drinker, sober curious

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who keeps saying "it's not that bad," send them this episode. Sometimes hearing someone else's "enough" is the mirror that helps them find their own.

#WhatsYourEnough #YouDontNeedARockBottom #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #ChooseYourEnough #QuitDrinking #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #IdentityShift #SoberCurious #EnoughIsEnough #PersonalLeadership #StopWaiting #SeedOfChange #AlcoholFree

]]> Jumping into a pool in my bra and underwear at a 4th of July party wasn't enough. Passing out on my husband's shoulder five minutes into a Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga concert we'd waited eight months for wasn't enough. Saying a cuss word in front of 700 people with their heads bowed in prayer at my husband's work event wasn't enough. But telling my then 23-year-old son to go blank himself while blacked out? That was enough. And I still remember his face the next morning when he told me what I'd said.

In Episode 22 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear gets raw about the moments that weren't enough, the one that finally was, and why the difference had everything to do with identity. This episode isn't just about alcohol. It's about why intelligent, successful people stay stuck long after they know something needs to change, and how to choose your own "enough" before life chooses it for you.

Kari also shares three client stories of "enough" moments: the business trip that went too far, the wife who finally walked out, and the doctor who delivered news that couldn't be ignored. Every person's enough is different. The question is whether you'll choose yours or wait for it to choose you.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The three embarrassing stories that still weren't enough for Kari to change

• The one moment that was, and why it hit differently than all the others

• Why none of those earlier moments changed her identity, but the night with her son did

• The neuroscience behind why our brains prefer unhealthy familiar over healthy unfamiliar

• Why you keep comparing yourself to people who are worse off instead of people who are healthy

• Three real client stories of "enough" moments: the business trip, the packed bag, the doctor's warning

• Why most people aren't waiting for rock bottom, they're waiting for certainty

• The leadership parallel: why leaders pivot fast in business but wait years in their personal lives

• How the seed of change works, and why it took Kari two years of seeds before she acted

• Questions to sit with this week that might help you find your own enough

If you've been thinking about something you know needs to change but you keep telling yourself "it's not that bad," this episode is going to hold up a mirror. And maybe today is your enough.

—————
FREE RESOURCES
👇

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT -Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Download the free pocket-sized field guide of 28 practical tools men can reach for the moment they're tempted to drink, the days they're trying to build differently, and the deeper identity questions underneath both.
👉 28 Tools: Question the Drink


Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇
https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 9: "Am I Drinking Too Much?" (Stages of Change)

Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking Explained

—————

TOPICS COVERED

rock bottom myth, you don't need a rock bottom, gray area drinking, enough moment, why people stay stuck, identity and change, choosing to change, midlife change, quit drinking story, embarrassing drunk stories, high performers and alcohol, brain and habits, neuroscience of change, comparing yourself to others, seed of change, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, agency and change, personal leadership, gray area drinker, sober curious

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who keeps saying "it's not that bad," send them this episode. Sometimes hearing someone else's "enough" is the mirror that helps them find their own.

#WhatsYourEnough #YouDontNeedARockBottom #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #ChooseYourEnough #QuitDrinking #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #IdentityShift #SoberCurious #EnoughIsEnough #PersonalLeadership #StopWaiting #SeedOfChange #AlcoholFree

]]> Tue, 14 Jul 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1356 Jumping into a pool in my bra and underwear at a 4th of July party wasn't enough. Passing out on my husband's shoulder five minutes into a Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga concert we'd waited eight months for wasn't enough. Saying a cuss word in front of 700 people with their heads bowed in prayer at my husband's work event wasn't enough. But telling my then 23-year-old son to go blank himself while blacked out? That was enough. And I still remember his face the next morning when he told me what I'd said.

In Episode 22 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear gets raw about the moments that weren't enough, the one that finally was, and why the difference had everything to do with identity. This episode isn't just about alcohol. It's about why intelligent, successful people stay stuck long after they know something needs to change, and how to choose your own "enough" before life chooses it for you.

Kari also shares three client stories of "enough" moments: the business trip that went too far, the wife who finally walked out, and the doctor who delivered news that couldn't be ignored. Every person's enough is different. The question is whether you'll choose yours or wait for it to choose you.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The three embarrassing stories that still weren't enough for Kari to change

• The one moment that was, and why it hit differently than all the others

• Why none of those earlier moments changed her identity, but the night with her son did

• The neuroscience behind why our brains prefer unhealthy familiar over healthy unfamiliar

• Why you keep comparing yourself to people who are worse off instead of people who are healthy

• Three real client stories of "enough" moments: the business trip, the packed bag, the doctor's warning

• Why most people aren't waiting for rock bottom, they're waiting for certainty

• The leadership parallel: why leaders pivot fast in business but wait years in their personal lives

• How the seed of change works, and why it took Kari two years of seeds before she acted

• Questions to sit with this week that might help you find your own enough

If you've been thinking about something you know needs to change but you keep telling yourself "it's not that bad," this episode is going to hold up a mirror. And maybe today is your enough.

—————
FREE RESOURCES
👇

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT -Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Download the free pocket-sized field guide of 28 practical tools men can reach for the moment they're tempted to drink, the days they're trying to build differently, and the deeper identity questions underneath both.
👉 28 Tools: Question the Drink


Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇
https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 9: "Am I Drinking Too Much?" (Stages of Change)

Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking Explained

—————

TOPICS COVERED

rock bottom myth, you don't need a rock bottom, gray area drinking, enough moment, why people stay stuck, identity and change, choosing to change, midlife change, quit drinking story, embarrassing drunk stories, high performers and alcohol, brain and habits, neuroscience of change, comparing yourself to others, seed of change, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, agency and change, personal leadership, gray area drinker, sober curious

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone who keeps saying "it's not that bad," send them this episode. Sometimes hearing someone else's "enough" is the mirror that helps them find their own.

#WhatsYourEnough #YouDontNeedARockBottom #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #ChooseYourEnough #QuitDrinking #MidlifeChange #HighPerformers #IdentityShift #SoberCurious #EnoughIsEnough #PersonalLeadership #StopWaiting #SeedOfChange #AlcoholFree

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No Questioning Your Faith: The Gray Areas of Spirituality | Ep. 21 21 21 Questioning Your Faith: The Gray Areas of Spirituality | Ep. 21 full 09329967-6ef7-4cd8-90f3-557081a72440 https://share.transistor.fm/s/9e334c21 People will talk about politics. They'll talk about money. They'll even talk about their drinking. But faith? That's where most people go silent.

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear sits down with Joshua Jurkovich, entrepreneur, ultra-runner, and founder of Level10 Growth and Kingdom Impact Network, for one of the most honest, unapologetic conversations this podcast has ever had. They go straight at the gray areas of faith that most Christians won't say out loud: church hurt vs. leaving God, why "new thought" and manifestation culture quietly replace God with self, and why the wealthiest, most successful people are often the emptiest on the inside.

Josh shares his own rock-bottom season of disordered priorities, his experience with substances used to numb out, and the moment surrender changed everything. This isn't a religious lecture. It's a grace-and-truth conversation for anyone who believes in God "but," or isn't sure where they fit anymore.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why "new thought" and new age practices quietly replace God with self, and how to spot it

• The difference between leaving a church and leaving God

• Why Kari's wealthiest, most successful clients are often the most depleted on the inside

• What "disordered desires" means and why it explains the midlife crisis

• Josh's rock-bottom season: breakup, loss, and the verse that reordered everything

• The truth about ayahuasca, yoga, and spiritual "portals" from a Christian perspective

• Why "it's not religion that's become political; it's politics that's become religious"

• Practical first steps for anyone stuck in the gray area of their faith

• Why the new age movement puts all the burden on you, while Jesus said His burden is light

• Josh's closing line: "Your spirit is being formed. It's just a question of by what."

If you've ever believed in God but felt the "but" creeping in, or if you've been hurt by the church and walked away from something bigger than the building, this conversation was made for you.

—————

CHAPTERS

00:00 Intro: Why Faith Feels Off-Limits

01:58 Meet Josh: "Man of God" Before Anything Else

05:38 We All Worship Something

07:43 Church Hurt vs. Leaving God

16:01 What Is "New Thought"? (Enneagram, Manifestation, Self vs. God)

23:34 Wealthy and Empty: Why Success Doesn't Satisfy

26:19 Josh's Rock-Bottom Season and Disordered Priorities

31:01 Ayahuasca, Yoga, and Spiritual "Portals"

36:50 Where to Start: Surrender and the Holy Spirit

40:36 Kingdom Impact Network: A Home for Seekers

43:09 Closing Thought: What's Forming Your Spirit?

—————

GUEST: Joshua  Jurkovich

Entrepreneur, ultra-runner, follower of Jesus first. Founder of Level10 Growth and co-founder of Kingdom Impact Network.
Connect with Josh on IG: https://www.instagram.com/joshjurk
Join us at Kingdom Impact Network: https://kingdomimpact.network

—————

BOOKS MENTIONED

Happy Lies by Melissa Dougherty:

https://www.amazon.com/Happy-Lies-Movement-Probably-Self-Obsessed/dp/0310368863

The Steps to Freedom in Christ by Neil T. Anderson:

https://www.amazon.com/Steps-Freedom-Christ-Spiritual-Conflicts/dp/0764219421

The Bondage Breaker by Neil T. Anderson:

https://www.amazon.com/Bondage-Breaker%C2%AE-Overcoming-Negative-Irrational/dp/0736975918

The Infinite Game by Simon Sinek:

https://www.amazon.com/Infinite-Game-Simon-Sinek/dp/073521350X

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————


New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this conversation stirred something in your spirit, share it with someone who's been wrestling with faith in silence. Sometimes the most important gray area to address is the one between you and God.

#GrayAreasOfFaith #ChurchHurt #FaithOverFear #NewThoughtMovement #ManifestationVsGod #SpiritualFormation #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #JoshuaJurkovich #KingdomImpact #ChristianEntrepreneur #WealthyAndEmpty #Surrender #MidlifeFaith #DisorderedDesires #GrayTonic #WhatAreYouWorshiping


]]> People will talk about politics. They'll talk about money. They'll even talk about their drinking. But faith? That's where most people go silent.

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear sits down with Joshua Jurkovich, entrepreneur, ultra-runner, and founder of Level10 Growth and Kingdom Impact Network, for one of the most honest, unapologetic conversations this podcast has ever had. They go straight at the gray areas of faith that most Christians won't say out loud: church hurt vs. leaving God, why "new thought" and manifestation culture quietly replace God with self, and why the wealthiest, most successful people are often the emptiest on the inside.

Josh shares his own rock-bottom season of disordered priorities, his experience with substances used to numb out, and the moment surrender changed everything. This isn't a religious lecture. It's a grace-and-truth conversation for anyone who believes in God "but," or isn't sure where they fit anymore.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why "new thought" and new age practices quietly replace God with self, and how to spot it

• The difference between leaving a church and leaving God

• Why Kari's wealthiest, most successful clients are often the most depleted on the inside

• What "disordered desires" means and why it explains the midlife crisis

• Josh's rock-bottom season: breakup, loss, and the verse that reordered everything

• The truth about ayahuasca, yoga, and spiritual "portals" from a Christian perspective

• Why "it's not religion that's become political; it's politics that's become religious"

• Practical first steps for anyone stuck in the gray area of their faith

• Why the new age movement puts all the burden on you, while Jesus said His burden is light

• Josh's closing line: "Your spirit is being formed. It's just a question of by what."

If you've ever believed in God but felt the "but" creeping in, or if you've been hurt by the church and walked away from something bigger than the building, this conversation was made for you.

—————

CHAPTERS

00:00 Intro: Why Faith Feels Off-Limits

01:58 Meet Josh: "Man of God" Before Anything Else

05:38 We All Worship Something

07:43 Church Hurt vs. Leaving God

16:01 What Is "New Thought"? (Enneagram, Manifestation, Self vs. God)

23:34 Wealthy and Empty: Why Success Doesn't Satisfy

26:19 Josh's Rock-Bottom Season and Disordered Priorities

31:01 Ayahuasca, Yoga, and Spiritual "Portals"

36:50 Where to Start: Surrender and the Holy Spirit

40:36 Kingdom Impact Network: A Home for Seekers

43:09 Closing Thought: What's Forming Your Spirit?

—————

GUEST: Joshua  Jurkovich

Entrepreneur, ultra-runner, follower of Jesus first. Founder of Level10 Growth and co-founder of Kingdom Impact Network.
Connect with Josh on IG: https://www.instagram.com/joshjurk
Join us at Kingdom Impact Network: https://kingdomimpact.network

—————

BOOKS MENTIONED

Happy Lies by Melissa Dougherty:

https://www.amazon.com/Happy-Lies-Movement-Probably-Self-Obsessed/dp/0310368863

The Steps to Freedom in Christ by Neil T. Anderson:

https://www.amazon.com/Steps-Freedom-Christ-Spiritual-Conflicts/dp/0764219421

The Bondage Breaker by Neil T. Anderson:

https://www.amazon.com/Bondage-Breaker%C2%AE-Overcoming-Negative-Irrational/dp/0736975918

The Infinite Game by Simon Sinek:

https://www.amazon.com/Infinite-Game-Simon-Sinek/dp/073521350X

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————


New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this conversation stirred something in your spirit, share it with someone who's been wrestling with faith in silence. Sometimes the most important gray area to address is the one between you and God.

#GrayAreasOfFaith #ChurchHurt #FaithOverFear #NewThoughtMovement #ManifestationVsGod #SpiritualFormation #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #JoshuaJurkovich #KingdomImpact #ChristianEntrepreneur #WealthyAndEmpty #Surrender #MidlifeFaith #DisorderedDesires #GrayTonic #WhatAreYouWorshiping


]]> Tue, 07 Jul 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 2629 People will talk about politics. They'll talk about money. They'll even talk about their drinking. But faith? That's where most people go silent.

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear sits down with Joshua Jurkovich, entrepreneur, ultra-runner, and founder of Level10 Growth and Kingdom Impact Network, for one of the most honest, unapologetic conversations this podcast has ever had. They go straight at the gray areas of faith that most Christians won't say out loud: church hurt vs. leaving God, why "new thought" and manifestation culture quietly replace God with self, and why the wealthiest, most successful people are often the emptiest on the inside.

Josh shares his own rock-bottom season of disordered priorities, his experience with substances used to numb out, and the moment surrender changed everything. This isn't a religious lecture. It's a grace-and-truth conversation for anyone who believes in God "but," or isn't sure where they fit anymore.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why "new thought" and new age practices quietly replace God with self, and how to spot it

• The difference between leaving a church and leaving God

• Why Kari's wealthiest, most successful clients are often the most depleted on the inside

• What "disordered desires" means and why it explains the midlife crisis

• Josh's rock-bottom season: breakup, loss, and the verse that reordered everything

• The truth about ayahuasca, yoga, and spiritual "portals" from a Christian perspective

• Why "it's not religion that's become political; it's politics that's become religious"

• Practical first steps for anyone stuck in the gray area of their faith

• Why the new age movement puts all the burden on you, while Jesus said His burden is light

• Josh's closing line: "Your spirit is being formed. It's just a question of by what."

If you've ever believed in God but felt the "but" creeping in, or if you've been hurt by the church and walked away from something bigger than the building, this conversation was made for you.

—————

CHAPTERS

00:00 Intro: Why Faith Feels Off-Limits

01:58 Meet Josh: "Man of God" Before Anything Else

05:38 We All Worship Something

07:43 Church Hurt vs. Leaving God

16:01 What Is "New Thought"? (Enneagram, Manifestation, Self vs. God)

23:34 Wealthy and Empty: Why Success Doesn't Satisfy

26:19 Josh's Rock-Bottom Season and Disordered Priorities

31:01 Ayahuasca, Yoga, and Spiritual "Portals"

36:50 Where to Start: Surrender and the Holy Spirit

40:36 Kingdom Impact Network: A Home for Seekers

43:09 Closing Thought: What's Forming Your Spirit?

—————

GUEST: Joshua  Jurkovich

Entrepreneur, ultra-runner, follower of Jesus first. Founder of Level10 Growth and co-founder of Kingdom Impact Network.
Connect with Josh on IG: https://www.instagram.com/joshjurk
Join us at Kingdom Impact Network: https://kingdomimpact.network

—————

BOOKS MENTIONED

Happy Lies by Melissa Dougherty:

https://www.amazon.com/Happy-Lies-Movement-Probably-Self-Obsessed/dp/0310368863

The Steps to Freedom in Christ by Neil T. Anderson:

https://www.amazon.com/Steps-Freedom-Christ-Spiritual-Conflicts/dp/0764219421

The Bondage Breaker by Neil T. Anderson:

https://www.amazon.com/Bondage-Breaker%C2%AE-Overcoming-Negative-Irrational/dp/0736975918

The Infinite Game by Simon Sinek:

https://www.amazon.com/Infinite-Game-Simon-Sinek/dp/073521350X

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————


New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this conversation stirred something in your spirit, share it with someone who's been wrestling with faith in silence. Sometimes the most important gray area to address is the one between you and God.

#GrayAreasOfFaith #ChurchHurt #FaithOverFear #NewThoughtMovement #ManifestationVsGod #SpiritualFormation #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #JoshuaJurkovich #KingdomImpact #ChristianEntrepreneur #WealthyAndEmpty #Surrender #MidlifeFaith #DisorderedDesires #GrayTonic #WhatAreYouWorshiping


]]> gray areas of faith, church hurt, leaving the church, new thought movement, manifestation vs God, enneagram and Christianity, wealthy and empty, disordered desires, midlife faith crisis, ayahuasca Christian perspective, yoga and Christianity, spiritual formation, surrender to God, Kingdom Impact Network, Joshua Jurkovich, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, faith and alcohol, gray area drinking, spiritual gray areas, new age vs Christianity, Christian entrepreneur No On Ozempic and Still Drinking? | GLP-1s, Antidepressants, and What Nobody's Telling You |Ep.20 20 20 On Ozempic and Still Drinking? | GLP-1s, Antidepressants, and What Nobody's Telling You |Ep.20 full a2937325-4204-4b28-9efa-b9d834837d96 https://share.transistor.fm/s/15fbe6de Millions of people are currently taking a GLP-1 medication or an antidepressant. Many of them are also drinking. Very few of them have been told what's actually happening inside their bodies when they do. That changes today.

In Episode 20 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear breaks down the real risks of mixing alcohol with GLP-1 medications like Ozempic, Wegovy, Mounjaro, and Zepbound, as well as common antidepressants like Prozac, Zoloft, Lexapro, Effexor, and Cymbalta. This isn't opinion. Every point is backed by published research, linked below. And it's the conversation your 15-minute doctor appointment doesn't have time for.

Kari also shares her own experience on tirzepatide, including the lab result that made her stop, and what she's seen working with clients who were on these medications and still drinking without realizing what it was costing them.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The surprising research showing GLP-1s may reduce alcohol cravings by up to 50%

• Why that doesn't mean it's safe to keep drinking on these medications

• 6 specific risks of mixing alcohol with GLP-1 medications

• Risk #1: Getting drunk faster and feeling it longer (your old tolerance no longer applies)

• Risk #2: Dangerously low blood sugar from two directions at once

• Risk #3: Pancreatitis risk increases (and Kari's personal experience with elevated pancreas levels)

• Risk #4: Your medication may stop working the way it should

• Risk #5: Dehydration compounds everything

• Risk #6: Your liver is being asked to do too much at once

• Why alcohol is literally working against your antidepressant every time you drink

• The critical first 4-6 weeks on a new antidepressant and why drinking during that window can make it impossible to know if the medication is working

• SSRIs vs SNRIs: what you need to know about each type and alcohol

• Why most people underreport their drinking to their doctor and why that has to change

• The gray area drinking connection: this isn't about blackouts, it's about the two to four drinks most nights that feel "fine"

If you're on a GLP-1, an antidepressant, or both, and you're still drinking, this episode gives you the information you need to have a real conversation with your doctor. Because the conversation has to start somewhere.

—————

DISCLAIMER

This episode is for educational purposes only. Kari Schwear is a coach, not a doctor. If any of this information raises questions about your health or medications, please consult your physician. All research sources are linked below.

—————

RESEARCH SOURCES

GLP-1 medications and alcohol use disorder outcomes (Wang, Volkow et al., 2024):

https://www.addictionpolicy.org/post/glp-1-agonists-show-promise-in-treating-substance-use-disorders

GLP-1 drugs may delay alcohol effects in the bloodstream (Virginia Tech / Fralin Institute, Scientific Reports 2025):

https://medicalxpress.com/news/2025-10-glp-drugs-delay-alcohol-effects.html

Alcohol and GLP-1 medications: hypoglycemia and pancreatitis risks (Healthy Life Recovery, 2025):

https://healthyliferecovery.com/can-you-drink-alcohol-while-taking-glp-1-medications/

GLP-1 and alcohol: tolerance, side effects, safety (Healthon.com, 2026):

https://healthon.com/blogs/journal/glp-1-and-alcohol-what-to-know-about-tolerance-side-effects-and-safety

Drinking alcohol on semaglutide or tirzepatide (Mochi Health):

https://joinmochi.com/blog/can-you-drink-alcohol-on-semaglutide-or-tirzepatide

Ozempic and alcohol: risks and guidance (MedShadow Foundation, 2026):

https://medshadow.org/drug-updates-recalls/can-i-take-this-with-that/ozempic-and-alcohol-can-i-drink-while-taking-glp-1-drugs/

Antidepressants and alcohol: the dangers (Mental Health Providers, 2025):

https://mentalhealthproviders.org/addiction/the-dangers-of-mixing-antidepressants-and-alcohol/

Antidepressants and alcohol (Mayo Clinic):

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/expert-answers/antidepressants-and-alcohol/faq-20058231

Antidepressants and alcohol: what's the concern (Cleveland Clinic, 2025):

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/antidepressants-and-alcohol

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.

Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.
Download the FREE Audit here

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

GLP-1 and alcohol, Ozempic and drinking, can you drink on Ozempic, Mounjaro and alcohol, Wegovy and alcohol, Zepbound and drinking, semaglutide alcohol risks, tirzepatide and alcohol, antidepressants and alcohol, drinking on antidepressants, SSRI and alcohol, Prozac and drinking, Zoloft and alcohol, gray area drinking, pancreatitis risk GLP-1, blood sugar and alcohol, medication and alcohol risks, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone on a GLP-1 or an antidepressant who's still drinking, share this episode with them. They may not know what they don't know. And this information could ch...

]]> Millions of people are currently taking a GLP-1 medication or an antidepressant. Many of them are also drinking. Very few of them have been told what's actually happening inside their bodies when they do. That changes today.

In Episode 20 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear breaks down the real risks of mixing alcohol with GLP-1 medications like Ozempic, Wegovy, Mounjaro, and Zepbound, as well as common antidepressants like Prozac, Zoloft, Lexapro, Effexor, and Cymbalta. This isn't opinion. Every point is backed by published research, linked below. And it's the conversation your 15-minute doctor appointment doesn't have time for.

Kari also shares her own experience on tirzepatide, including the lab result that made her stop, and what she's seen working with clients who were on these medications and still drinking without realizing what it was costing them.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The surprising research showing GLP-1s may reduce alcohol cravings by up to 50%

• Why that doesn't mean it's safe to keep drinking on these medications

• 6 specific risks of mixing alcohol with GLP-1 medications

• Risk #1: Getting drunk faster and feeling it longer (your old tolerance no longer applies)

• Risk #2: Dangerously low blood sugar from two directions at once

• Risk #3: Pancreatitis risk increases (and Kari's personal experience with elevated pancreas levels)

• Risk #4: Your medication may stop working the way it should

• Risk #5: Dehydration compounds everything

• Risk #6: Your liver is being asked to do too much at once

• Why alcohol is literally working against your antidepressant every time you drink

• The critical first 4-6 weeks on a new antidepressant and why drinking during that window can make it impossible to know if the medication is working

• SSRIs vs SNRIs: what you need to know about each type and alcohol

• Why most people underreport their drinking to their doctor and why that has to change

• The gray area drinking connection: this isn't about blackouts, it's about the two to four drinks most nights that feel "fine"

If you're on a GLP-1, an antidepressant, or both, and you're still drinking, this episode gives you the information you need to have a real conversation with your doctor. Because the conversation has to start somewhere.

—————

DISCLAIMER

This episode is for educational purposes only. Kari Schwear is a coach, not a doctor. If any of this information raises questions about your health or medications, please consult your physician. All research sources are linked below.

—————

RESEARCH SOURCES

GLP-1 medications and alcohol use disorder outcomes (Wang, Volkow et al., 2024):

https://www.addictionpolicy.org/post/glp-1-agonists-show-promise-in-treating-substance-use-disorders

GLP-1 drugs may delay alcohol effects in the bloodstream (Virginia Tech / Fralin Institute, Scientific Reports 2025):

https://medicalxpress.com/news/2025-10-glp-drugs-delay-alcohol-effects.html

Alcohol and GLP-1 medications: hypoglycemia and pancreatitis risks (Healthy Life Recovery, 2025):

https://healthyliferecovery.com/can-you-drink-alcohol-while-taking-glp-1-medications/

GLP-1 and alcohol: tolerance, side effects, safety (Healthon.com, 2026):

https://healthon.com/blogs/journal/glp-1-and-alcohol-what-to-know-about-tolerance-side-effects-and-safety

Drinking alcohol on semaglutide or tirzepatide (Mochi Health):

https://joinmochi.com/blog/can-you-drink-alcohol-on-semaglutide-or-tirzepatide

Ozempic and alcohol: risks and guidance (MedShadow Foundation, 2026):

https://medshadow.org/drug-updates-recalls/can-i-take-this-with-that/ozempic-and-alcohol-can-i-drink-while-taking-glp-1-drugs/

Antidepressants and alcohol: the dangers (Mental Health Providers, 2025):

https://mentalhealthproviders.org/addiction/the-dangers-of-mixing-antidepressants-and-alcohol/

Antidepressants and alcohol (Mayo Clinic):

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/expert-answers/antidepressants-and-alcohol/faq-20058231

Antidepressants and alcohol: what's the concern (Cleveland Clinic, 2025):

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/antidepressants-and-alcohol

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.

Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.
Download the FREE Audit here

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

GLP-1 and alcohol, Ozempic and drinking, can you drink on Ozempic, Mounjaro and alcohol, Wegovy and alcohol, Zepbound and drinking, semaglutide alcohol risks, tirzepatide and alcohol, antidepressants and alcohol, drinking on antidepressants, SSRI and alcohol, Prozac and drinking, Zoloft and alcohol, gray area drinking, pancreatitis risk GLP-1, blood sugar and alcohol, medication and alcohol risks, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone on a GLP-1 or an antidepressant who's still drinking, share this episode with them. They may not know what they don't know. And this information could ch...

]]> Tue, 30 Jun 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1339 Millions of people are currently taking a GLP-1 medication or an antidepressant. Many of them are also drinking. Very few of them have been told what's actually happening inside their bodies when they do. That changes today.

In Episode 20 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear breaks down the real risks of mixing alcohol with GLP-1 medications like Ozempic, Wegovy, Mounjaro, and Zepbound, as well as common antidepressants like Prozac, Zoloft, Lexapro, Effexor, and Cymbalta. This isn't opinion. Every point is backed by published research, linked below. And it's the conversation your 15-minute doctor appointment doesn't have time for.

Kari also shares her own experience on tirzepatide, including the lab result that made her stop, and what she's seen working with clients who were on these medications and still drinking without realizing what it was costing them.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The surprising research showing GLP-1s may reduce alcohol cravings by up to 50%

• Why that doesn't mean it's safe to keep drinking on these medications

• 6 specific risks of mixing alcohol with GLP-1 medications

• Risk #1: Getting drunk faster and feeling it longer (your old tolerance no longer applies)

• Risk #2: Dangerously low blood sugar from two directions at once

• Risk #3: Pancreatitis risk increases (and Kari's personal experience with elevated pancreas levels)

• Risk #4: Your medication may stop working the way it should

• Risk #5: Dehydration compounds everything

• Risk #6: Your liver is being asked to do too much at once

• Why alcohol is literally working against your antidepressant every time you drink

• The critical first 4-6 weeks on a new antidepressant and why drinking during that window can make it impossible to know if the medication is working

• SSRIs vs SNRIs: what you need to know about each type and alcohol

• Why most people underreport their drinking to their doctor and why that has to change

• The gray area drinking connection: this isn't about blackouts, it's about the two to four drinks most nights that feel "fine"

If you're on a GLP-1, an antidepressant, or both, and you're still drinking, this episode gives you the information you need to have a real conversation with your doctor. Because the conversation has to start somewhere.

—————

DISCLAIMER

This episode is for educational purposes only. Kari Schwear is a coach, not a doctor. If any of this information raises questions about your health or medications, please consult your physician. All research sources are linked below.

—————

RESEARCH SOURCES

GLP-1 medications and alcohol use disorder outcomes (Wang, Volkow et al., 2024):

https://www.addictionpolicy.org/post/glp-1-agonists-show-promise-in-treating-substance-use-disorders

GLP-1 drugs may delay alcohol effects in the bloodstream (Virginia Tech / Fralin Institute, Scientific Reports 2025):

https://medicalxpress.com/news/2025-10-glp-drugs-delay-alcohol-effects.html

Alcohol and GLP-1 medications: hypoglycemia and pancreatitis risks (Healthy Life Recovery, 2025):

https://healthyliferecovery.com/can-you-drink-alcohol-while-taking-glp-1-medications/

GLP-1 and alcohol: tolerance, side effects, safety (Healthon.com, 2026):

https://healthon.com/blogs/journal/glp-1-and-alcohol-what-to-know-about-tolerance-side-effects-and-safety

Drinking alcohol on semaglutide or tirzepatide (Mochi Health):

https://joinmochi.com/blog/can-you-drink-alcohol-on-semaglutide-or-tirzepatide

Ozempic and alcohol: risks and guidance (MedShadow Foundation, 2026):

https://medshadow.org/drug-updates-recalls/can-i-take-this-with-that/ozempic-and-alcohol-can-i-drink-while-taking-glp-1-drugs/

Antidepressants and alcohol: the dangers (Mental Health Providers, 2025):

https://mentalhealthproviders.org/addiction/the-dangers-of-mixing-antidepressants-and-alcohol/

Antidepressants and alcohol (Mayo Clinic):

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/expert-answers/antidepressants-and-alcohol/faq-20058231

Antidepressants and alcohol: what's the concern (Cleveland Clinic, 2025):

https://health.clevelandclinic.org/antidepressants-and-alcohol

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.

Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.
Download the FREE Audit here

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

GLP-1 and alcohol, Ozempic and drinking, can you drink on Ozempic, Mounjaro and alcohol, Wegovy and alcohol, Zepbound and drinking, semaglutide alcohol risks, tirzepatide and alcohol, antidepressants and alcohol, drinking on antidepressants, SSRI and alcohol, Prozac and drinking, Zoloft and alcohol, gray area drinking, pancreatitis risk GLP-1, blood sugar and alcohol, medication and alcohol risks, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If you know someone on a GLP-1 or an antidepressant who's still drinking, share this episode with them. They may not know what they don't know. And this information could ch...

]]> ozempic, glp1, tirzepatide, semuglutide, retatutride, antidepressants, drinking on meds, risks of drinking on antidepressants, drinking on glp1 meds, gray areas No How to Stop an Urge Before It Wins | A 5-Step Neuroscience Tool | Ep. 19 19 19 How to Stop an Urge Before It Wins | A 5-Step Neuroscience Tool | Ep. 19 full de281b36-6794-4e0b-a1cc-00c02db78eaa https://share.transistor.fm/s/da8041d3 What happens when you feel the urge or nudge to drink and you know you are better off without it? Back in 2018, I was 18 months sober, standing in a grocery store, staring at a display of Chardonnay right next to the fish counter. My mouth was salivating. My brain was screaming, "Just buy it." And I did the only thing I could think of. I yelled "STOP" out loud. In the middle of the store. In front of everyone.

That moment became the foundation of everything I now teach my clients. In Episode 19 of Beyond the Gray, I'm sharing the SABER Method for the first time on the podcast. It's a five-step, neuroscience-backed tool for the exact moment when life tries to pull you back into old patterns. Not motivation. Not willpower. An actual map for what to do when the urge hits and your brain is on fire.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The full grocery store story: 18 months sober, one bad day, and a display of Chardonnay

• Why willpower is a lie and what actually works in the moment

• Cognitive dissonance explained: the internal power struggle between who you were and who you're becoming

• The six core universal emotions and how they trigger old patterns before your conscious mind catches up

• Protective states vs. expansive states and how to move between them

• Neuroplasticity and neurosculpting: how every SABER practice builds a new neural pathway

• The full SABER Method breakdown: Stop, Acknowledge, Breathe, Embrace, Redirect

• Why "embrace" is the step most people skip and why it might be the most important

• How to use SABER as a verb: "SABER your way through" any tough moment

• A practice you can start today and questions to sit with this week

If you've ever had a moment where the old version of you showed up uninvited and you didn't know what to do, this episode gives you the exact tool to handle it. Not someday. Right now.

—————

THE SABER METHOD

S — Stop (say it out loud)

A — Acknowledge (observe without obeying)

B — Breathe (calm the nervous system)

E — Embrace (give yourself grace)

R — Redirect (gratitude + a new powerful decision)

—————
New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT
👇

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
DOWNLOAD THE FREE AUDIT HERE

Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

Email: hello@graytonic.com

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 18: Intentionality and Awareness

—————

TOPICS COVERED

SABER Method, how to stop drinking urges, resisting alcohol cravings, gray area drinking tools, cognitive dissonance alcohol, willpower doesn't work, neuroplasticity and habits, neurosculpting, protective vs expansive state, pattern interrupt, stop drinking method, Kari Schwear, GrayTonic, Beyond the Gray podcast, midlife sobriety, high performers and alcohol, craving management, alcohol-free tools, sober tools

—————


If you've ever had a moment where the old you almost won, share this episode with someone who needs a map for what to do next time. The SABER Method might be the tool they've been looking for.

#SABERMethod #GrayAreaDrinking #StopDrinkingUrges #CognitivDissonance #WillpowerDoesntWork #Neuroplasticity #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #AlcoholFree #PatternInterrupt #MidlifeSobriety #SoberTools #HighPerformers #SABERYourWayThrough #ProtectiveToExpansive #NewNeuralPathways


]]> What happens when you feel the urge or nudge to drink and you know you are better off without it? Back in 2018, I was 18 months sober, standing in a grocery store, staring at a display of Chardonnay right next to the fish counter. My mouth was salivating. My brain was screaming, "Just buy it." And I did the only thing I could think of. I yelled "STOP" out loud. In the middle of the store. In front of everyone.

That moment became the foundation of everything I now teach my clients. In Episode 19 of Beyond the Gray, I'm sharing the SABER Method for the first time on the podcast. It's a five-step, neuroscience-backed tool for the exact moment when life tries to pull you back into old patterns. Not motivation. Not willpower. An actual map for what to do when the urge hits and your brain is on fire.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The full grocery store story: 18 months sober, one bad day, and a display of Chardonnay

• Why willpower is a lie and what actually works in the moment

• Cognitive dissonance explained: the internal power struggle between who you were and who you're becoming

• The six core universal emotions and how they trigger old patterns before your conscious mind catches up

• Protective states vs. expansive states and how to move between them

• Neuroplasticity and neurosculpting: how every SABER practice builds a new neural pathway

• The full SABER Method breakdown: Stop, Acknowledge, Breathe, Embrace, Redirect

• Why "embrace" is the step most people skip and why it might be the most important

• How to use SABER as a verb: "SABER your way through" any tough moment

• A practice you can start today and questions to sit with this week

If you've ever had a moment where the old version of you showed up uninvited and you didn't know what to do, this episode gives you the exact tool to handle it. Not someday. Right now.

—————

THE SABER METHOD

S — Stop (say it out loud)

A — Acknowledge (observe without obeying)

B — Breathe (calm the nervous system)

E — Embrace (give yourself grace)

R — Redirect (gratitude + a new powerful decision)

—————
New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT
👇

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
DOWNLOAD THE FREE AUDIT HERE

Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

Email: hello@graytonic.com

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 18: Intentionality and Awareness

—————

TOPICS COVERED

SABER Method, how to stop drinking urges, resisting alcohol cravings, gray area drinking tools, cognitive dissonance alcohol, willpower doesn't work, neuroplasticity and habits, neurosculpting, protective vs expansive state, pattern interrupt, stop drinking method, Kari Schwear, GrayTonic, Beyond the Gray podcast, midlife sobriety, high performers and alcohol, craving management, alcohol-free tools, sober tools

—————


If you've ever had a moment where the old you almost won, share this episode with someone who needs a map for what to do next time. The SABER Method might be the tool they've been looking for.

#SABERMethod #GrayAreaDrinking #StopDrinkingUrges #CognitivDissonance #WillpowerDoesntWork #Neuroplasticity #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #AlcoholFree #PatternInterrupt #MidlifeSobriety #SoberTools #HighPerformers #SABERYourWayThrough #ProtectiveToExpansive #NewNeuralPathways


]]> Tue, 23 Jun 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1397 What happens when you feel the urge or nudge to drink and you know you are better off without it? Back in 2018, I was 18 months sober, standing in a grocery store, staring at a display of Chardonnay right next to the fish counter. My mouth was salivating. My brain was screaming, "Just buy it." And I did the only thing I could think of. I yelled "STOP" out loud. In the middle of the store. In front of everyone.

That moment became the foundation of everything I now teach my clients. In Episode 19 of Beyond the Gray, I'm sharing the SABER Method for the first time on the podcast. It's a five-step, neuroscience-backed tool for the exact moment when life tries to pull you back into old patterns. Not motivation. Not willpower. An actual map for what to do when the urge hits and your brain is on fire.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The full grocery store story: 18 months sober, one bad day, and a display of Chardonnay

• Why willpower is a lie and what actually works in the moment

• Cognitive dissonance explained: the internal power struggle between who you were and who you're becoming

• The six core universal emotions and how they trigger old patterns before your conscious mind catches up

• Protective states vs. expansive states and how to move between them

• Neuroplasticity and neurosculpting: how every SABER practice builds a new neural pathway

• The full SABER Method breakdown: Stop, Acknowledge, Breathe, Embrace, Redirect

• Why "embrace" is the step most people skip and why it might be the most important

• How to use SABER as a verb: "SABER your way through" any tough moment

• A practice you can start today and questions to sit with this week

If you've ever had a moment where the old version of you showed up uninvited and you didn't know what to do, this episode gives you the exact tool to handle it. Not someday. Right now.

—————

THE SABER METHOD

S — Stop (say it out loud)

A — Acknowledge (observe without obeying)

B — Breathe (calm the nervous system)

E — Embrace (give yourself grace)

R — Redirect (gratitude + a new powerful decision)

—————
New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT
👇

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
DOWNLOAD THE FREE AUDIT HERE

Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for leaders who are ready to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

Email: hello@graytonic.com

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

EPISODES REFERENCED

Episode 18: Intentionality and Awareness

—————

TOPICS COVERED

SABER Method, how to stop drinking urges, resisting alcohol cravings, gray area drinking tools, cognitive dissonance alcohol, willpower doesn't work, neuroplasticity and habits, neurosculpting, protective vs expansive state, pattern interrupt, stop drinking method, Kari Schwear, GrayTonic, Beyond the Gray podcast, midlife sobriety, high performers and alcohol, craving management, alcohol-free tools, sober tools

—————


If you've ever had a moment where the old you almost won, share this episode with someone who needs a map for what to do next time. The SABER Method might be the tool they've been looking for.

#SABERMethod #GrayAreaDrinking #StopDrinkingUrges #CognitivDissonance #WillpowerDoesntWork #Neuroplasticity #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #AlcoholFree #PatternInterrupt #MidlifeSobriety #SoberTools #HighPerformers #SABERYourWayThrough #ProtectiveToExpansive #NewNeuralPathways


]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No Why High Performers Ignore What’s Broken (And the 5-Minute Habit That Changes Everything) |Ep.18 18 18 Why High Performers Ignore What’s Broken (And the 5-Minute Habit That Changes Everything) |Ep.18 full 59d88180-7238-474b-8981-25cbb06fd9ad https://share.transistor.fm/s/9ca55260 You already know something is off. You've known for a while. And yet you keep hoping it'll somehow fix itself while you pour another drink to make it easier to not think about it. Sound familiar? This episode is for you.

In this solo episode, Kari Schwear breaks down the pattern she sees in high-performing men over and over again. One area of life is thriving while everything else is quietly collapsing. Great business, dying marriage. Just quit drinking, but now the faith is gone and the health is declining. The blinders are on and the hope-it-fixes-itself strategy is running the show. She shares the cultural lies that keep you stuck, what Scripture actually says about trying to compartmentalize your life, her own experience with tunnel vision after she quit drinking, and the one five-minute daily tool called WIGS that creates the awareness and intentionality needed to finally address what you've been ignoring.

This one is practical, honest, and hits exactly where it needs to.

In this episode you'll hear:

  • Why high-performing men focus on the one thing that's working and ignore everything else
  • How alcohol fills the gap when awareness isn't paired with intentionality
  • The hustle culture lies that keep successful people stuck
  • What Matthew 6:33 and Matthew 12:25 say about trying to compartmentalize your life
  • Kari's own tunnel vision story after she quit drinking and what it cost her
  • The WIGS framework: Wins, Intentions, and Gratitudes, a five-minute nightly habit that changes everything
  • A real-life example of what WIGS looks like for a man whose business is thriving but his marriage is not
  • How WIGS ties into the DECIDE method and why daily habits are the foundation of real change
  • A practical next step: the Gray Area Audit and how it shows you what you've been ignoring

If you've been grinding harder and hoping everything else catches up, it won't. But intentionality will get you there. This episode shows you exactly how to start.


TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core 4 areas of your life: Body, Being, Balance, and Business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you. Download it HERE.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience is a private, structured coaching experience designed for high-performing leaders and business owners who know something is off. It's not a group program. It's not a webinar. It's a real conversation about your real life across all four areas: Body, Being, Balance, and Business.

Gray Area Insights Experience

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/


CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/


RESOURCES MENTIONED

Gray Area Audit (free download) - linked in show notes

DECIDE Method - introduced in earlier Beyond the Gray episodes

Brian Bogart - concept of AI: Awareness + Intentionality

Matthew 6:33 - Seek first the kingdom of God

Matthew 12:25 - A house divided against itself cannot stand


TOPICS COVERED

gray area drinking, gray area life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, why men ignore problems, high performers and burnout, awareness and intentionality, WIGS method, wins intentions gratitudes, daily habits for men, midlife men and marriage, gray area drinking midlife, how to stop numbing, men over 50 health, Core 4 framework, Body Being Balance Business, DECIDE method, hustle culture lies, marriage and business balance, faith and success, Christian men midlife, Matthew 6 33, tunnel vision and self improvement, how to get unstuck, gratitude journaling, intentional living, gray area audit, executive life coach, life transformation, men's mental health, drinking and stress, quitting alcohol midlife


New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

]]> You already know something is off. You've known for a while. And yet you keep hoping it'll somehow fix itself while you pour another drink to make it easier to not think about it. Sound familiar? This episode is for you.

In this solo episode, Kari Schwear breaks down the pattern she sees in high-performing men over and over again. One area of life is thriving while everything else is quietly collapsing. Great business, dying marriage. Just quit drinking, but now the faith is gone and the health is declining. The blinders are on and the hope-it-fixes-itself strategy is running the show. She shares the cultural lies that keep you stuck, what Scripture actually says about trying to compartmentalize your life, her own experience with tunnel vision after she quit drinking, and the one five-minute daily tool called WIGS that creates the awareness and intentionality needed to finally address what you've been ignoring.

This one is practical, honest, and hits exactly where it needs to.

In this episode you'll hear:

  • Why high-performing men focus on the one thing that's working and ignore everything else
  • How alcohol fills the gap when awareness isn't paired with intentionality
  • The hustle culture lies that keep successful people stuck
  • What Matthew 6:33 and Matthew 12:25 say about trying to compartmentalize your life
  • Kari's own tunnel vision story after she quit drinking and what it cost her
  • The WIGS framework: Wins, Intentions, and Gratitudes, a five-minute nightly habit that changes everything
  • A real-life example of what WIGS looks like for a man whose business is thriving but his marriage is not
  • How WIGS ties into the DECIDE method and why daily habits are the foundation of real change
  • A practical next step: the Gray Area Audit and how it shows you what you've been ignoring

If you've been grinding harder and hoping everything else catches up, it won't. But intentionality will get you there. This episode shows you exactly how to start.


TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core 4 areas of your life: Body, Being, Balance, and Business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you. Download it HERE.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience is a private, structured coaching experience designed for high-performing leaders and business owners who know something is off. It's not a group program. It's not a webinar. It's a real conversation about your real life across all four areas: Body, Being, Balance, and Business.

Gray Area Insights Experience

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/


CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/


RESOURCES MENTIONED

Gray Area Audit (free download) - linked in show notes

DECIDE Method - introduced in earlier Beyond the Gray episodes

Brian Bogart - concept of AI: Awareness + Intentionality

Matthew 6:33 - Seek first the kingdom of God

Matthew 12:25 - A house divided against itself cannot stand


TOPICS COVERED

gray area drinking, gray area life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, why men ignore problems, high performers and burnout, awareness and intentionality, WIGS method, wins intentions gratitudes, daily habits for men, midlife men and marriage, gray area drinking midlife, how to stop numbing, men over 50 health, Core 4 framework, Body Being Balance Business, DECIDE method, hustle culture lies, marriage and business balance, faith and success, Christian men midlife, Matthew 6 33, tunnel vision and self improvement, how to get unstuck, gratitude journaling, intentional living, gray area audit, executive life coach, life transformation, men's mental health, drinking and stress, quitting alcohol midlife


New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

]]> Tue, 16 Jun 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1310 You already know something is off. You've known for a while. And yet you keep hoping it'll somehow fix itself while you pour another drink to make it easier to not think about it. Sound familiar? This episode is for you.

In this solo episode, Kari Schwear breaks down the pattern she sees in high-performing men over and over again. One area of life is thriving while everything else is quietly collapsing. Great business, dying marriage. Just quit drinking, but now the faith is gone and the health is declining. The blinders are on and the hope-it-fixes-itself strategy is running the show. She shares the cultural lies that keep you stuck, what Scripture actually says about trying to compartmentalize your life, her own experience with tunnel vision after she quit drinking, and the one five-minute daily tool called WIGS that creates the awareness and intentionality needed to finally address what you've been ignoring.

This one is practical, honest, and hits exactly where it needs to.

In this episode you'll hear:

  • Why high-performing men focus on the one thing that's working and ignore everything else
  • How alcohol fills the gap when awareness isn't paired with intentionality
  • The hustle culture lies that keep successful people stuck
  • What Matthew 6:33 and Matthew 12:25 say about trying to compartmentalize your life
  • Kari's own tunnel vision story after she quit drinking and what it cost her
  • The WIGS framework: Wins, Intentions, and Gratitudes, a five-minute nightly habit that changes everything
  • A real-life example of what WIGS looks like for a man whose business is thriving but his marriage is not
  • How WIGS ties into the DECIDE method and why daily habits are the foundation of real change
  • A practical next step: the Gray Area Audit and how it shows you what you've been ignoring

If you've been grinding harder and hoping everything else catches up, it won't. But intentionality will get you there. This episode shows you exactly how to start.


TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core 4 areas of your life: Body, Being, Balance, and Business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you. Download it HERE.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience is a private, structured coaching experience designed for high-performing leaders and business owners who know something is off. It's not a group program. It's not a webinar. It's a real conversation about your real life across all four areas: Body, Being, Balance, and Business.

Gray Area Insights Experience

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/


CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/


RESOURCES MENTIONED

Gray Area Audit (free download) - linked in show notes

DECIDE Method - introduced in earlier Beyond the Gray episodes

Brian Bogart - concept of AI: Awareness + Intentionality

Matthew 6:33 - Seek first the kingdom of God

Matthew 12:25 - A house divided against itself cannot stand


TOPICS COVERED

gray area drinking, gray area life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, why men ignore problems, high performers and burnout, awareness and intentionality, WIGS method, wins intentions gratitudes, daily habits for men, midlife men and marriage, gray area drinking midlife, how to stop numbing, men over 50 health, Core 4 framework, Body Being Balance Business, DECIDE method, hustle culture lies, marriage and business balance, faith and success, Christian men midlife, Matthew 6 33, tunnel vision and self improvement, how to get unstuck, gratitude journaling, intentional living, gray area audit, executive life coach, life transformation, men's mental health, drinking and stress, quitting alcohol midlife


New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No We Thought We Had More Time | What My Father's Unexpected Passing Taught Me About Life | Ep.17 17 17 We Thought We Had More Time | What My Father's Unexpected Passing Taught Me About Life | Ep.17 full a97c23c1-d69d-4a2b-8fa8-ca9c79afdd1f https://share.transistor.fm/s/b428d0ae My dad passed away the morning of this recording. This episode wasn't planned. I hit record because something happened this week that made everything else feel insignificant. Twenty-three family members gathered in Branson, Missouri. We laughed, we played games, we sat on the porch together. My dad told my husband, "You won't see me tomorrow, Rob. I'm going home." We didn't know how true those words would be.

This isn't a grief story. This is a wake-up call. Because gray areas are dangerous precisely because nothing ever feels urgent inside them. We always think there's more time. More chances. More tomorrows. And then life steps in and reminds us that we were never guaranteed any of it.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The last week I spent with my dad and why it became the greatest gift of my life

• His final words to Rob and what they meant

• Why I'm only talking about three of the Core Four today (and why business doesn't matter)

• A plea about faith, getting right with God, and what watching someone die teaches you about living

• What carrying the APOE4 gene for Alzheimer's on both sides means for how I live now

• The respiratory nurse named Eric who showed our family what it looks like to live your faith out loud

• Why you need to stop postponing the conversation, the trip, the relationship, and the change

• Rob's words that changed everything: "A piece of your father gets to live on through you"

If you've been putting something off because you think there's still time, this episode is going to sit with you. And I hope it moves you to stop waiting.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

losing a parent, grief and gratitude, don't wait, life is short, Alzheimer's, APOE4 gene, faith and death, gray area drinking, stop postponing, Core Four, body being balance business, midlife wake-up call, intentional living, relationships matter, time is finite

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode moved you, please share it with someone who needs to hear it. Sometimes the most important message is the simplest one: don't wait.

#DontWait #LifeIsShort #LosingAParent #GriefAndGratitude #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FaithAndLoss #IntentionalLiving #CoreFour #StopPostponing #Alzheimers #APOE4 #MidlifeWakeUpCall #TreasureEveryDay

]]> My dad passed away the morning of this recording. This episode wasn't planned. I hit record because something happened this week that made everything else feel insignificant. Twenty-three family members gathered in Branson, Missouri. We laughed, we played games, we sat on the porch together. My dad told my husband, "You won't see me tomorrow, Rob. I'm going home." We didn't know how true those words would be.

This isn't a grief story. This is a wake-up call. Because gray areas are dangerous precisely because nothing ever feels urgent inside them. We always think there's more time. More chances. More tomorrows. And then life steps in and reminds us that we were never guaranteed any of it.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The last week I spent with my dad and why it became the greatest gift of my life

• His final words to Rob and what they meant

• Why I'm only talking about three of the Core Four today (and why business doesn't matter)

• A plea about faith, getting right with God, and what watching someone die teaches you about living

• What carrying the APOE4 gene for Alzheimer's on both sides means for how I live now

• The respiratory nurse named Eric who showed our family what it looks like to live your faith out loud

• Why you need to stop postponing the conversation, the trip, the relationship, and the change

• Rob's words that changed everything: "A piece of your father gets to live on through you"

If you've been putting something off because you think there's still time, this episode is going to sit with you. And I hope it moves you to stop waiting.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

losing a parent, grief and gratitude, don't wait, life is short, Alzheimer's, APOE4 gene, faith and death, gray area drinking, stop postponing, Core Four, body being balance business, midlife wake-up call, intentional living, relationships matter, time is finite

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode moved you, please share it with someone who needs to hear it. Sometimes the most important message is the simplest one: don't wait.

#DontWait #LifeIsShort #LosingAParent #GriefAndGratitude #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FaithAndLoss #IntentionalLiving #CoreFour #StopPostponing #Alzheimers #APOE4 #MidlifeWakeUpCall #TreasureEveryDay

]]> Tue, 09 Jun 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1198 My dad passed away the morning of this recording. This episode wasn't planned. I hit record because something happened this week that made everything else feel insignificant. Twenty-three family members gathered in Branson, Missouri. We laughed, we played games, we sat on the porch together. My dad told my husband, "You won't see me tomorrow, Rob. I'm going home." We didn't know how true those words would be.

This isn't a grief story. This is a wake-up call. Because gray areas are dangerous precisely because nothing ever feels urgent inside them. We always think there's more time. More chances. More tomorrows. And then life steps in and reminds us that we were never guaranteed any of it.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The last week I spent with my dad and why it became the greatest gift of my life

• His final words to Rob and what they meant

• Why I'm only talking about three of the Core Four today (and why business doesn't matter)

• A plea about faith, getting right with God, and what watching someone die teaches you about living

• What carrying the APOE4 gene for Alzheimer's on both sides means for how I live now

• The respiratory nurse named Eric who showed our family what it looks like to live your faith out loud

• Why you need to stop postponing the conversation, the trip, the relationship, and the change

• Rob's words that changed everything: "A piece of your father gets to live on through you"

If you've been putting something off because you think there's still time, this episode is going to sit with you. And I hope it moves you to stop waiting.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you.
https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

losing a parent, grief and gratitude, don't wait, life is short, Alzheimer's, APOE4 gene, faith and death, gray area drinking, stop postponing, Core Four, body being balance business, midlife wake-up call, intentional living, relationships matter, time is finite

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode moved you, please share it with someone who needs to hear it. Sometimes the most important message is the simplest one: don't wait.

#DontWait #LifeIsShort #LosingAParent #GriefAndGratitude #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FaithAndLoss #IntentionalLiving #CoreFour #StopPostponing #Alzheimers #APOE4 #MidlifeWakeUpCall #TreasureEveryDay

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No We Fasted for 3 Days (No Food, No Noise, No Phone) | What Happened Spiritually and Physically | Ep.16 16 16 We Fasted for 3 Days (No Food, No Noise, No Phone) | What Happened Spiritually and Physically | Ep.16 full 2ec2f99f-1389-4c36-a404-65d8b9331d2d https://share.transistor.fm/s/8487a1cb We went away for our 37th wedding anniversary and we didn't eat a single thing for three days. No food, no phone, no noise. Just water, sea salt, worship music, and God. And what happened changed us both in ways we're still processing.

In this episode, Kari and her husband Rob walk you through their three-day water fast, day by day. This wasn't about weight loss or a cleanse. It was a spiritual discipline, a decision to give up something they love in order to get closer to God. They share the physical reality of fasting, the science behind what your body does, the unexpected emotional and spiritual breakthroughs, and what it felt like to strip away every distraction including food, screens, and noise for 72 hours.

Whether you're spiritually curious, physically motivated, or just wondering what would happen if you finally turned everything off and listened, this one is for you.

In this episode you'll hear:

Why Kari and Rob chose to fast for spiritual reasons, not physical ones

  • What it's actually like to go three days with only water and sea salt
  • The car that wouldn't start, the s'mores they didn't touch, and the fog that rolled in over the West Virginia mountains
  • The science of autophagy, ketosis, and what a three-day fast actually does to your body
  • Rob's surprising breakthrough about food, gratitude, and what he actually needs to be okay
  • Kari's experience on day two when the pain came and she had to lean even harder into God
  • What no-noise weekends reveal about how much we use distraction to avoid real rest
  • How to safely break a fast and why what you eat first really matters
  • A closing prayer for anyone who wants to create more space to hear from God

If you've been going through the motions, filling every hour, and wondering why you still feel disconnected, maybe the answer isn't doing more. Maybe it's doing less.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience is a private, structured coaching experience designed for high-performing leaders and business owners who know something is off. It's not a group program. It's not a webinar. It's a real conversation about your real life, all four areas: Body, Being, Balance, and Business.

Gray Area Insights Experience

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Hume scale and app (body composition tracking): https://www.ouraring.com (search "Hume body scale")

Baja sea salt (used during the fast)

AAA roadside assistance: https://www.aaa.com

Transtheoretical Model of Change (Stages of Change) - Listen or Watch Episode 9


📌Want to book the AirBnB we stayed at? Here’s the LINK


TOPICS COVERED

three day water fast, spiritual fasting, fasting and faith, Christian fasting, gray area drinking, gray area life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, fasting for God, no food no noise, anniversary retreat, West Virginia Airbnb, autophagy explained, ketosis and fasting, fasting benefits, how to break a fast, bone broth after fasting, fasting and mental clarity, fasting and inflammation, men over 50 health, midlife clarity, high performers and burnout, disconnecting from technology, no-phone weekend, spiritual discipline, Rob Schwear, couples faith journey, marriage and spirituality, hearing from God, prayer and fasting, scripture and fasting, Jesus fasted 40 days

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode made you think about what you might be using to numb the noise in your own life, share it with someone who needs to hear it.

#GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FastingForGod #SpiritualFasting #3DayFast #WaterFast #ChristianFasting #Autophagy #MidlifeClarity #NoNoiseWeekend #MenOver50 #HighPerformers #FaithAndHealth #DoHardThings #MarriageGoals #GrayAreaLife


]]> We went away for our 37th wedding anniversary and we didn't eat a single thing for three days. No food, no phone, no noise. Just water, sea salt, worship music, and God. And what happened changed us both in ways we're still processing.

In this episode, Kari and her husband Rob walk you through their three-day water fast, day by day. This wasn't about weight loss or a cleanse. It was a spiritual discipline, a decision to give up something they love in order to get closer to God. They share the physical reality of fasting, the science behind what your body does, the unexpected emotional and spiritual breakthroughs, and what it felt like to strip away every distraction including food, screens, and noise for 72 hours.

Whether you're spiritually curious, physically motivated, or just wondering what would happen if you finally turned everything off and listened, this one is for you.

In this episode you'll hear:

Why Kari and Rob chose to fast for spiritual reasons, not physical ones

  • What it's actually like to go three days with only water and sea salt
  • The car that wouldn't start, the s'mores they didn't touch, and the fog that rolled in over the West Virginia mountains
  • The science of autophagy, ketosis, and what a three-day fast actually does to your body
  • Rob's surprising breakthrough about food, gratitude, and what he actually needs to be okay
  • Kari's experience on day two when the pain came and she had to lean even harder into God
  • What no-noise weekends reveal about how much we use distraction to avoid real rest
  • How to safely break a fast and why what you eat first really matters
  • A closing prayer for anyone who wants to create more space to hear from God

If you've been going through the motions, filling every hour, and wondering why you still feel disconnected, maybe the answer isn't doing more. Maybe it's doing less.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience is a private, structured coaching experience designed for high-performing leaders and business owners who know something is off. It's not a group program. It's not a webinar. It's a real conversation about your real life, all four areas: Body, Being, Balance, and Business.

Gray Area Insights Experience

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Hume scale and app (body composition tracking): https://www.ouraring.com (search "Hume body scale")

Baja sea salt (used during the fast)

AAA roadside assistance: https://www.aaa.com

Transtheoretical Model of Change (Stages of Change) - Listen or Watch Episode 9


📌Want to book the AirBnB we stayed at? Here’s the LINK


TOPICS COVERED

three day water fast, spiritual fasting, fasting and faith, Christian fasting, gray area drinking, gray area life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, fasting for God, no food no noise, anniversary retreat, West Virginia Airbnb, autophagy explained, ketosis and fasting, fasting benefits, how to break a fast, bone broth after fasting, fasting and mental clarity, fasting and inflammation, men over 50 health, midlife clarity, high performers and burnout, disconnecting from technology, no-phone weekend, spiritual discipline, Rob Schwear, couples faith journey, marriage and spirituality, hearing from God, prayer and fasting, scripture and fasting, Jesus fasted 40 days

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode made you think about what you might be using to numb the noise in your own life, share it with someone who needs to hear it.

#GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FastingForGod #SpiritualFasting #3DayFast #WaterFast #ChristianFasting #Autophagy #MidlifeClarity #NoNoiseWeekend #MenOver50 #HighPerformers #FaithAndHealth #DoHardThings #MarriageGoals #GrayAreaLife


]]> Tue, 02 Jun 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 2453 We went away for our 37th wedding anniversary and we didn't eat a single thing for three days. No food, no phone, no noise. Just water, sea salt, worship music, and God. And what happened changed us both in ways we're still processing.

In this episode, Kari and her husband Rob walk you through their three-day water fast, day by day. This wasn't about weight loss or a cleanse. It was a spiritual discipline, a decision to give up something they love in order to get closer to God. They share the physical reality of fasting, the science behind what your body does, the unexpected emotional and spiritual breakthroughs, and what it felt like to strip away every distraction including food, screens, and noise for 72 hours.

Whether you're spiritually curious, physically motivated, or just wondering what would happen if you finally turned everything off and listened, this one is for you.

In this episode you'll hear:

Why Kari and Rob chose to fast for spiritual reasons, not physical ones

  • What it's actually like to go three days with only water and sea salt
  • The car that wouldn't start, the s'mores they didn't touch, and the fog that rolled in over the West Virginia mountains
  • The science of autophagy, ketosis, and what a three-day fast actually does to your body
  • Rob's surprising breakthrough about food, gratitude, and what he actually needs to be okay
  • Kari's experience on day two when the pain came and she had to lean even harder into God
  • What no-noise weekends reveal about how much we use distraction to avoid real rest
  • How to safely break a fast and why what you eat first really matters
  • A closing prayer for anyone who wants to create more space to hear from God

If you've been going through the motions, filling every hour, and wondering why you still feel disconnected, maybe the answer isn't doing more. Maybe it's doing less.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience is a private, structured coaching experience designed for high-performing leaders and business owners who know something is off. It's not a group program. It's not a webinar. It's a real conversation about your real life, all four areas: Body, Being, Balance, and Business.

Gray Area Insights Experience

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Hume scale and app (body composition tracking): https://www.ouraring.com (search "Hume body scale")

Baja sea salt (used during the fast)

AAA roadside assistance: https://www.aaa.com

Transtheoretical Model of Change (Stages of Change) - Listen or Watch Episode 9


📌Want to book the AirBnB we stayed at? Here’s the LINK


TOPICS COVERED

three day water fast, spiritual fasting, fasting and faith, Christian fasting, gray area drinking, gray area life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, fasting for God, no food no noise, anniversary retreat, West Virginia Airbnb, autophagy explained, ketosis and fasting, fasting benefits, how to break a fast, bone broth after fasting, fasting and mental clarity, fasting and inflammation, men over 50 health, midlife clarity, high performers and burnout, disconnecting from technology, no-phone weekend, spiritual discipline, Rob Schwear, couples faith journey, marriage and spirituality, hearing from God, prayer and fasting, scripture and fasting, Jesus fasted 40 days

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode made you think about what you might be using to numb the noise in your own life, share it with someone who needs to hear it.

#GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #FastingForGod #SpiritualFasting #3DayFast #WaterFast #ChristianFasting #Autophagy #MidlifeClarity #NoNoiseWeekend #MenOver50 #HighPerformers #FaithAndHealth #DoHardThings #MarriageGoals #GrayAreaLife


]]> three day water fast, spiritual fasting, fasting and faith, Christian fasting, gray area drinking, gray area life, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, fasting for God, no food no noise, anniversary retreat, West Virginia Airbnb, autophagy explained, ketosis and fasting, fasting benefits, how to break a fast, bone broth after fasting, fasting and mental clarity, fasting and inflammation, men over 50 health, midlife clarity, high performers and burnout, disconnecting from technology, no-phone weekend, spiritual discipline, Rob Schwear, couples faith journey, marriage and spirituality, hearing from God, prayer and fasting, scripture and fasting, Jesus fasted 40 days No The Sandwich Generation Explained: Empty Nest, Aging Parents & Midlife Purpose | Ep. 15 15 15 The Sandwich Generation Explained: Empty Nest, Aging Parents & Midlife Purpose | Ep. 15 full bf9f36bc-2b66-4b5e-8e99-5d36d46a5e66 https://share.transistor.fm/s/42ce1e96 You raised them to leave. And they did. So why does it feel like grief?

In Episode 15 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear talks about the gray area that nobody warns you about: the sandwich generation. That strange middle ground where your kids are grown and thriving, but your parents are aging or already gone. And you're standing in between, proud and grieving at the same time, wondering, "Who am I now?"

This episode started with a Mother's Day post that went viral in Kari's community. The responses poured in from moms and dads who had never said it out loud: "I'm proud of my kids, but I miss being needed." That one sentence cracked open a conversation that most people in their 50s and 60s are having inside their heads but rarely with anyone else.

Kari gets personal about her own empty nester experience, how drinking went up after the kids left, the identity crisis she didn't see coming, and why the sandwich generation is one of the most overlooked gray areas in midlife.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why pride and grief can coexist in the same hour and why that doesn't make you ungrateful

• The identity crisis that hits when "mom" or "dad" is no longer your primary role

• How Kari and Rob's drinking went up after their kids moved out and why that's more common than people admit

• What it's like to watch a parent decline with Alzheimer's while your kids no longer need you

• The difference between how men and women process the empty nest (and why both are valid)

• Why busyness, hobbies, and alcohol are often just ways to fill a void that only purpose can fill

• The real comments from listeners that prove you're not the only one feeling this

• Questions to sit with this week: Who am I now? What do I actually want?

• A prayer for anyone navigating this season

If you're in your 50s or 60s and you've been feeling proud and lost at the same time, this episode will make you feel seen. And if you've noticed your drinking go up since your kids left, there might be a connection worth exploring.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you. Download it from the link below. 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for high-performing leaders who know something needs to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari: 👇

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website: 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

sandwich generation, empty nester identity crisis, kids don't need me anymore, proud and grieving at the same time, identity after kids leave, midlife identity crisis, gray area drinking empty nester, aging parents and grown kids, who am I now, purpose after 50, empty nest and drinking, sandwich generation and alcohol, midlife purpose, caregiver burnout, Alzheimer's parent, empty nester marriage, Beyond the Gray podcast, Kari Schwear

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode named something you've been feeling but haven't said out loud, share it with someone who needs permission to feel it too. Sometimes just knowing you're not alone changes everything.

#SandwichGeneration #EmptyNester #KidsDontNeedMe #ProudAndGrieving #WhoAmINow #MidlifeIdentity #GrayAreaDrinking #EmptyNestAndAlcohol #AgingParents #PurposeAfter50 #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #MidlifeTransformation #EmptyNesterMarriage #IdentityCrisis #AlcoholFree


]]> You raised them to leave. And they did. So why does it feel like grief?

In Episode 15 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear talks about the gray area that nobody warns you about: the sandwich generation. That strange middle ground where your kids are grown and thriving, but your parents are aging or already gone. And you're standing in between, proud and grieving at the same time, wondering, "Who am I now?"

This episode started with a Mother's Day post that went viral in Kari's community. The responses poured in from moms and dads who had never said it out loud: "I'm proud of my kids, but I miss being needed." That one sentence cracked open a conversation that most people in their 50s and 60s are having inside their heads but rarely with anyone else.

Kari gets personal about her own empty nester experience, how drinking went up after the kids left, the identity crisis she didn't see coming, and why the sandwich generation is one of the most overlooked gray areas in midlife.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why pride and grief can coexist in the same hour and why that doesn't make you ungrateful

• The identity crisis that hits when "mom" or "dad" is no longer your primary role

• How Kari and Rob's drinking went up after their kids moved out and why that's more common than people admit

• What it's like to watch a parent decline with Alzheimer's while your kids no longer need you

• The difference between how men and women process the empty nest (and why both are valid)

• Why busyness, hobbies, and alcohol are often just ways to fill a void that only purpose can fill

• The real comments from listeners that prove you're not the only one feeling this

• Questions to sit with this week: Who am I now? What do I actually want?

• A prayer for anyone navigating this season

If you're in your 50s or 60s and you've been feeling proud and lost at the same time, this episode will make you feel seen. And if you've noticed your drinking go up since your kids left, there might be a connection worth exploring.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you. Download it from the link below. 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for high-performing leaders who know something needs to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari: 👇

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website: 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

sandwich generation, empty nester identity crisis, kids don't need me anymore, proud and grieving at the same time, identity after kids leave, midlife identity crisis, gray area drinking empty nester, aging parents and grown kids, who am I now, purpose after 50, empty nest and drinking, sandwich generation and alcohol, midlife purpose, caregiver burnout, Alzheimer's parent, empty nester marriage, Beyond the Gray podcast, Kari Schwear

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode named something you've been feeling but haven't said out loud, share it with someone who needs permission to feel it too. Sometimes just knowing you're not alone changes everything.

#SandwichGeneration #EmptyNester #KidsDontNeedMe #ProudAndGrieving #WhoAmINow #MidlifeIdentity #GrayAreaDrinking #EmptyNestAndAlcohol #AgingParents #PurposeAfter50 #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #MidlifeTransformation #EmptyNesterMarriage #IdentityCrisis #AlcoholFree


]]> Tue, 26 May 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 964 You raised them to leave. And they did. So why does it feel like grief?

In Episode 15 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear talks about the gray area that nobody warns you about: the sandwich generation. That strange middle ground where your kids are grown and thriving, but your parents are aging or already gone. And you're standing in between, proud and grieving at the same time, wondering, "Who am I now?"

This episode started with a Mother's Day post that went viral in Kari's community. The responses poured in from moms and dads who had never said it out loud: "I'm proud of my kids, but I miss being needed." That one sentence cracked open a conversation that most people in their 50s and 60s are having inside their heads but rarely with anyone else.

Kari gets personal about her own empty nester experience, how drinking went up after the kids left, the identity crisis she didn't see coming, and why the sandwich generation is one of the most overlooked gray areas in midlife.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why pride and grief can coexist in the same hour and why that doesn't make you ungrateful

• The identity crisis that hits when "mom" or "dad" is no longer your primary role

• How Kari and Rob's drinking went up after their kids moved out and why that's more common than people admit

• What it's like to watch a parent decline with Alzheimer's while your kids no longer need you

• The difference between how men and women process the empty nest (and why both are valid)

• Why busyness, hobbies, and alcohol are often just ways to fill a void that only purpose can fill

• The real comments from listeners that prove you're not the only one feeling this

• Questions to sit with this week: Who am I now? What do I actually want?

• A prayer for anyone navigating this season

If you're in your 50s or 60s and you've been feeling proud and lost at the same time, this episode will make you feel seen. And if you've noticed your drinking go up since your kids left, there might be a connection worth exploring.

—————

TAKE THE GRAY AREA AUDIT

Not sure where your gray areas actually are? The Gray Area Audit is free, takes about 15 minutes, and looks at all four Core Four areas of your life: body, being, balance, and business. It will show you exactly where you're living in the gray and what it might be costing you. Download it from the link below. 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

Want to go deeper? The Gray Area Insights Experience includes a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed for high-performing leaders who know something needs to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari: 👇

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website: 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

TOPICS COVERED

sandwich generation, empty nester identity crisis, kids don't need me anymore, proud and grieving at the same time, identity after kids leave, midlife identity crisis, gray area drinking empty nester, aging parents and grown kids, who am I now, purpose after 50, empty nest and drinking, sandwich generation and alcohol, midlife purpose, caregiver burnout, Alzheimer's parent, empty nester marriage, Beyond the Gray podcast, Kari Schwear

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode named something you've been feeling but haven't said out loud, share it with someone who needs permission to feel it too. Sometimes just knowing you're not alone changes everything.

#SandwichGeneration #EmptyNester #KidsDontNeedMe #ProudAndGrieving #WhoAmINow #MidlifeIdentity #GrayAreaDrinking #EmptyNestAndAlcohol #AgingParents #PurposeAfter50 #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #MidlifeTransformation #EmptyNesterMarriage #IdentityCrisis #AlcoholFree


]]> sandwich generation, aging parents, midlife, empty nesters, kids launched, midlife questions, stuck in the middle, caregiver, aging parents, kids gone, no longer needed No 1,000 Days Sober: How a Teacher Stopped Using Alcohol as a Personality | Ep.14 14 14 1,000 Days Sober: How a Teacher Stopped Using Alcohol as a Personality | Ep.14 full c3f6ce0f-68e7-470a-bf90-7ac50d7957e2 https://share.transistor.fm/s/ff8855d7 He wasn't drinking because he loved alcohol. He was drinking because he didn't think people would like the real him.

In Episode 14 of Beyond the Gray, Kari welcomes Billy Lahr, host of the Mindful Midlife Crisis podcast, joining live from Seoul, South Korea. Billy shares his full story: growing up in small-town Minnesota where the bar was the Sunday restaurant, building a drinking identity in college, showing up hungover to teach ninth graders, and the moment anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation forced him to take a hard look at what alcohol was actually doing.

What followed was years of "sober school years," traveling the world alcohol-free, one bad date that became his zero day, and now at 1,000 days of sobriety. This conversation is raw, funny, and deeply relatable.

In this episode you'll hear:

• How Billy created a drinking personality to get people to like him and what it actually cost him

• The 180-day challenge that turned his mental health around

• Why he did "sober school years" from 2013 to 2021 and what he learned from each one

• The date that became his zero day and why "F the zero" keeps him going

• Why Billy believes "follow your passion" is terrible advice and what to follow instead

• The free writing practice (started in Minneapolis jails) that's now connecting people worldwide

• Kari's personal connection to free writing through her late friend Chris

• The hidden cost of staying in a gray area: living small and giving up agency

• Why comfort is fine but complacency will cost you everything

If you've ever used alcohol to fit in, to feel confident, or to become someone you thought the world wanted you to be, this conversation was made for you.

—————

GUEST: Billy Lahr

Mindful Midlife Crisis Podcast (120+ episodes)

Instagram: @mindful_midlife_crisis

LinkedIn: Billy Lahr

Community: www.mindfulmidlifecommunity.com

Email: billy@mindfulmidlifecrisis.com

To join the Free Writers community: https://www.mindfulmidlifecommunity.com/freewriters

—————

RESOURCES MENTIONED

📌Gray Area Audit (FREE DOWNLOAD)

Beyond the Gray Episode 3: Identity

Beyond the Gray Episode 11: Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic

Beyond the Gray Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking 101


READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on where you actually are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. It includes a behavioral scan and two deep coaching sessions. It's not therapy. It's clarity.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight


Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

📌New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode hit home, share it with someone who's been performing a version of themselves that only shows up after the third drink. Sometimes hearing someone else's story is the permission we need to start writing our own.

—————

TOPICS COVERED

gray area drinking, sober curious, alcohol and identity, drinking to fit in, people pleasing and alcohol, 1000 days sober, quit drinking story, midlife sobriety, teacher and alcohol, sober school year, alcohol and mental health, anxiety and drinking, free writing practice, mindful midlife crisis, Billy Lahr, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, alcohol-free living, drinking personality, external validation

—————

#GrayAreaDrinking #1000DaysSober #DrinkingToFitIn #SoberCurious #AlcoholAndIdentity #MidlifeSobriety #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #BillyLahr #MindfulMidlifeCrisis #AlcoholFree #DrinkingPersonality #MentalHealthAndAlcohol #FreeWriting #QuitDrinking #SoberExplorer #PeoplePleasing #HighPerformers

]]> He wasn't drinking because he loved alcohol. He was drinking because he didn't think people would like the real him.

In Episode 14 of Beyond the Gray, Kari welcomes Billy Lahr, host of the Mindful Midlife Crisis podcast, joining live from Seoul, South Korea. Billy shares his full story: growing up in small-town Minnesota where the bar was the Sunday restaurant, building a drinking identity in college, showing up hungover to teach ninth graders, and the moment anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation forced him to take a hard look at what alcohol was actually doing.

What followed was years of "sober school years," traveling the world alcohol-free, one bad date that became his zero day, and now at 1,000 days of sobriety. This conversation is raw, funny, and deeply relatable.

In this episode you'll hear:

• How Billy created a drinking personality to get people to like him and what it actually cost him

• The 180-day challenge that turned his mental health around

• Why he did "sober school years" from 2013 to 2021 and what he learned from each one

• The date that became his zero day and why "F the zero" keeps him going

• Why Billy believes "follow your passion" is terrible advice and what to follow instead

• The free writing practice (started in Minneapolis jails) that's now connecting people worldwide

• Kari's personal connection to free writing through her late friend Chris

• The hidden cost of staying in a gray area: living small and giving up agency

• Why comfort is fine but complacency will cost you everything

If you've ever used alcohol to fit in, to feel confident, or to become someone you thought the world wanted you to be, this conversation was made for you.

—————

GUEST: Billy Lahr

Mindful Midlife Crisis Podcast (120+ episodes)

Instagram: @mindful_midlife_crisis

LinkedIn: Billy Lahr

Community: www.mindfulmidlifecommunity.com

Email: billy@mindfulmidlifecrisis.com

To join the Free Writers community: https://www.mindfulmidlifecommunity.com/freewriters

—————

RESOURCES MENTIONED

📌Gray Area Audit (FREE DOWNLOAD)

Beyond the Gray Episode 3: Identity

Beyond the Gray Episode 11: Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic

Beyond the Gray Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking 101


READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on where you actually are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. It includes a behavioral scan and two deep coaching sessions. It's not therapy. It's clarity.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight


Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

📌New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode hit home, share it with someone who's been performing a version of themselves that only shows up after the third drink. Sometimes hearing someone else's story is the permission we need to start writing our own.

—————

TOPICS COVERED

gray area drinking, sober curious, alcohol and identity, drinking to fit in, people pleasing and alcohol, 1000 days sober, quit drinking story, midlife sobriety, teacher and alcohol, sober school year, alcohol and mental health, anxiety and drinking, free writing practice, mindful midlife crisis, Billy Lahr, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, alcohol-free living, drinking personality, external validation

—————

#GrayAreaDrinking #1000DaysSober #DrinkingToFitIn #SoberCurious #AlcoholAndIdentity #MidlifeSobriety #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #BillyLahr #MindfulMidlifeCrisis #AlcoholFree #DrinkingPersonality #MentalHealthAndAlcohol #FreeWriting #QuitDrinking #SoberExplorer #PeoplePleasing #HighPerformers

]]> Tue, 19 May 2026 03:47:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 2396 He wasn't drinking because he loved alcohol. He was drinking because he didn't think people would like the real him.

In Episode 14 of Beyond the Gray, Kari welcomes Billy Lahr, host of the Mindful Midlife Crisis podcast, joining live from Seoul, South Korea. Billy shares his full story: growing up in small-town Minnesota where the bar was the Sunday restaurant, building a drinking identity in college, showing up hungover to teach ninth graders, and the moment anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation forced him to take a hard look at what alcohol was actually doing.

What followed was years of "sober school years," traveling the world alcohol-free, one bad date that became his zero day, and now at 1,000 days of sobriety. This conversation is raw, funny, and deeply relatable.

In this episode you'll hear:

• How Billy created a drinking personality to get people to like him and what it actually cost him

• The 180-day challenge that turned his mental health around

• Why he did "sober school years" from 2013 to 2021 and what he learned from each one

• The date that became his zero day and why "F the zero" keeps him going

• Why Billy believes "follow your passion" is terrible advice and what to follow instead

• The free writing practice (started in Minneapolis jails) that's now connecting people worldwide

• Kari's personal connection to free writing through her late friend Chris

• The hidden cost of staying in a gray area: living small and giving up agency

• Why comfort is fine but complacency will cost you everything

If you've ever used alcohol to fit in, to feel confident, or to become someone you thought the world wanted you to be, this conversation was made for you.

—————

GUEST: Billy Lahr

Mindful Midlife Crisis Podcast (120+ episodes)

Instagram: @mindful_midlife_crisis

LinkedIn: Billy Lahr

Community: www.mindfulmidlifecommunity.com

Email: billy@mindfulmidlifecrisis.com

To join the Free Writers community: https://www.mindfulmidlifecommunity.com/freewriters

—————

RESOURCES MENTIONED

📌Gray Area Audit (FREE DOWNLOAD)

Beyond the Gray Episode 3: Identity

Beyond the Gray Episode 11: Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic

Beyond the Gray Episode 13: Gray Area Drinking 101


READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on where you actually are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. It includes a behavioral scan and two deep coaching sessions. It's not therapy. It's clarity.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight


Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

📌New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

If this episode hit home, share it with someone who's been performing a version of themselves that only shows up after the third drink. Sometimes hearing someone else's story is the permission we need to start writing our own.

—————

TOPICS COVERED

gray area drinking, sober curious, alcohol and identity, drinking to fit in, people pleasing and alcohol, 1000 days sober, quit drinking story, midlife sobriety, teacher and alcohol, sober school year, alcohol and mental health, anxiety and drinking, free writing practice, mindful midlife crisis, Billy Lahr, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, alcohol-free living, drinking personality, external validation

—————

#GrayAreaDrinking #1000DaysSober #DrinkingToFitIn #SoberCurious #AlcoholAndIdentity #MidlifeSobriety #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #BillyLahr #MindfulMidlifeCrisis #AlcoholFree #DrinkingPersonality #MentalHealthAndAlcohol #FreeWriting #QuitDrinking #SoberExplorer #PeoplePleasing #HighPerformers

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No Gray Area Drinking Explained | Not an Alcoholic, But Not Fine Either | Ep.13 13 13 Gray Area Drinking Explained | Not an Alcoholic, But Not Fine Either | Ep.13 full cd306264-00fe-4c98-b4bc-4576c7bbc79b https://share.transistor.fm/s/8b2c16cb There's a name for what you've been feeling. You're not an alcoholic. But you're not fine either. And nearly one in four American adults are in the exact same place right now.

In Episode 13 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear delivers the foundational episode she says she should have recorded first. She breaks down exactly what gray area drinking is, where the term originated (a 2011 NIH-sponsored study of 26,000+ adults), and the moment she heard it for the first time and everything in her life finally made sense. She walks through the clinical difference between gray area drinking and alcohol use disorder, shares real client stories of what was actually driving the drinking, and gives you seven signs to know if you're in the gray area right now.

This is the episode you send to someone who doesn't think they have "a real problem" but knows something is off.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The 2011 research study that first identified the gray area between moderate and risky drinking

• How Jolene Park's TEDx talk (300,000+ views) brought the term gray area drinking into the mainstream

• Kari's personal story of the sidewalk moment that changed everything and led to the creation of GrayTonic

• The clinical difference between gray area drinking and alcohol use disorder (AUD)

• Why gray area drinking is almost never the root issue, it's a symptom of misalignment

• Two real client stories: Sarah's "purpose problem" and Dave's business travel cycle

• Seven signs you might be a gray area drinker (sign #7 might surprise you)

• The habit loop from Atomic Habits and how the "forget it switch" keeps you stuck

• Why rock bottom is NOT a prerequisite for change, and why the gray area is actually the best time to act

• Books, tools, and next steps you can take starting today

If you've been wondering whether your drinking is "bad enough" to do something about it, this episode will change how you think about that question entirely. You don't need a rock bottom. You need language. And now you have it.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

Take the free Gray Area Audit and see where your gray areas actually are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. It takes about 15 minutes and it will give you clarity you didn't know you needed.

📌TAKE THE FREE GRAY AREA AUDIT: https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

The Gray Area Insights Experience goes even deeper with a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed specifically for high-performing leaders who know something needs to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

BOOKS MENTIONED

This Naked Mind by Annie Grace

Alcohol Explained by William Porter

Man Up Sober Up by Ryan Penley

Atomic Habits by James Clear


]]> There's a name for what you've been feeling. You're not an alcoholic. But you're not fine either. And nearly one in four American adults are in the exact same place right now.

In Episode 13 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear delivers the foundational episode she says she should have recorded first. She breaks down exactly what gray area drinking is, where the term originated (a 2011 NIH-sponsored study of 26,000+ adults), and the moment she heard it for the first time and everything in her life finally made sense. She walks through the clinical difference between gray area drinking and alcohol use disorder, shares real client stories of what was actually driving the drinking, and gives you seven signs to know if you're in the gray area right now.

This is the episode you send to someone who doesn't think they have "a real problem" but knows something is off.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The 2011 research study that first identified the gray area between moderate and risky drinking

• How Jolene Park's TEDx talk (300,000+ views) brought the term gray area drinking into the mainstream

• Kari's personal story of the sidewalk moment that changed everything and led to the creation of GrayTonic

• The clinical difference between gray area drinking and alcohol use disorder (AUD)

• Why gray area drinking is almost never the root issue, it's a symptom of misalignment

• Two real client stories: Sarah's "purpose problem" and Dave's business travel cycle

• Seven signs you might be a gray area drinker (sign #7 might surprise you)

• The habit loop from Atomic Habits and how the "forget it switch" keeps you stuck

• Why rock bottom is NOT a prerequisite for change, and why the gray area is actually the best time to act

• Books, tools, and next steps you can take starting today

If you've been wondering whether your drinking is "bad enough" to do something about it, this episode will change how you think about that question entirely. You don't need a rock bottom. You need language. And now you have it.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

Take the free Gray Area Audit and see where your gray areas actually are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. It takes about 15 minutes and it will give you clarity you didn't know you needed.

📌TAKE THE FREE GRAY AREA AUDIT: https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

The Gray Area Insights Experience goes even deeper with a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed specifically for high-performing leaders who know something needs to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

BOOKS MENTIONED

This Naked Mind by Annie Grace

Alcohol Explained by William Porter

Man Up Sober Up by Ryan Penley

Atomic Habits by James Clear


]]> Tue, 12 May 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 2028 There's a name for what you've been feeling. You're not an alcoholic. But you're not fine either. And nearly one in four American adults are in the exact same place right now.

In Episode 13 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear delivers the foundational episode she says she should have recorded first. She breaks down exactly what gray area drinking is, where the term originated (a 2011 NIH-sponsored study of 26,000+ adults), and the moment she heard it for the first time and everything in her life finally made sense. She walks through the clinical difference between gray area drinking and alcohol use disorder, shares real client stories of what was actually driving the drinking, and gives you seven signs to know if you're in the gray area right now.

This is the episode you send to someone who doesn't think they have "a real problem" but knows something is off.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The 2011 research study that first identified the gray area between moderate and risky drinking

• How Jolene Park's TEDx talk (300,000+ views) brought the term gray area drinking into the mainstream

• Kari's personal story of the sidewalk moment that changed everything and led to the creation of GrayTonic

• The clinical difference between gray area drinking and alcohol use disorder (AUD)

• Why gray area drinking is almost never the root issue, it's a symptom of misalignment

• Two real client stories: Sarah's "purpose problem" and Dave's business travel cycle

• Seven signs you might be a gray area drinker (sign #7 might surprise you)

• The habit loop from Atomic Habits and how the "forget it switch" keeps you stuck

• Why rock bottom is NOT a prerequisite for change, and why the gray area is actually the best time to act

• Books, tools, and next steps you can take starting today

If you've been wondering whether your drinking is "bad enough" to do something about it, this episode will change how you think about that question entirely. You don't need a rock bottom. You need language. And now you have it.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

Take the free Gray Area Audit and see where your gray areas actually are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. It takes about 15 minutes and it will give you clarity you didn't know you needed.

📌TAKE THE FREE GRAY AREA AUDIT: https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/

The Gray Area Insights Experience goes even deeper with a behavioral scan and two coaching sessions designed specifically for high-performing leaders who know something needs to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

BOOKS MENTIONED

This Naked Mind by Annie Grace

Alcohol Explained by William Porter

Man Up Sober Up by Ryan Penley

Atomic Habits by James Clear


]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No You Have 3 Years Left to Live - What Are You Waiting For? | A Wake-Up Call for Over 50 | Ep.12 12 12 You Have 3 Years Left to Live - What Are You Waiting For? | A Wake-Up Call for Over 50 | Ep.12 full 7302c204-e41d-4f2a-ae2e-db3e8b4123da https://share.transistor.fm/s/f9553173 If you only had three years left, what would you change? Not hypothetically. Actually. Would you keep drinking the way you are? Would you stay in the marriage you've been checked out of? Would you keep putting off the conversations, the reconciliation, the real work of becoming who you're supposed to be?

In Episode 12 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear delivers the wake-up call that most people over 50 need but aren't getting. She shares a powerful exercise from one of her private client retreats, the exact framework that made a room full of high-performing men and women get honest about their lives. It comes down to three questions: what do you need to surrender, what do you need to accomplish, and who do you need to become?

This is not a motivational speech. This is a mirror. And if you've been going through the motions, telling yourself there's still time, this episode is going to change how you think about every day you have left.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The "3 years left" exercise Kari uses at her private retreats and how it wakes people up

• A conversation with a 44-year-old man who realized his kids won't have a father for most of their adult lives

• The three questions: surrender, accomplish, become, and how to use them starting today

• Why surrendering isn't giving up, it's making room for what actually matters

• The friendships, habits, and beliefs that are taking up space without adding value

• Ed Mylett's "identical twin" standard and what it means for the man you're becoming

• Why gray area faith might be the most important gray area to address first

• The Core Four framework: body, being, balance, and business

• Details on Kari's upcoming November 2026 private retreat

• The one decision that changes everything: stop living like you're invincible

If you're a man or woman over 50 who's been coasting, numbing, avoiding, or just going through the motions, this episode is the one that might finally make you stop and ask, "What am I doing with the time I have left?" And then do something about it.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on where you actually are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. It includes a behavioral scan and two deep coaching sessions. It's not therapy. It's clarity. And it's designed for the person who's done waiting.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

Interested in the November 2026 Retreat?

Email: hello@graytonic.com or message Kari on LinkedIn

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.



]]> If you only had three years left, what would you change? Not hypothetically. Actually. Would you keep drinking the way you are? Would you stay in the marriage you've been checked out of? Would you keep putting off the conversations, the reconciliation, the real work of becoming who you're supposed to be?

In Episode 12 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear delivers the wake-up call that most people over 50 need but aren't getting. She shares a powerful exercise from one of her private client retreats, the exact framework that made a room full of high-performing men and women get honest about their lives. It comes down to three questions: what do you need to surrender, what do you need to accomplish, and who do you need to become?

This is not a motivational speech. This is a mirror. And if you've been going through the motions, telling yourself there's still time, this episode is going to change how you think about every day you have left.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The "3 years left" exercise Kari uses at her private retreats and how it wakes people up

• A conversation with a 44-year-old man who realized his kids won't have a father for most of their adult lives

• The three questions: surrender, accomplish, become, and how to use them starting today

• Why surrendering isn't giving up, it's making room for what actually matters

• The friendships, habits, and beliefs that are taking up space without adding value

• Ed Mylett's "identical twin" standard and what it means for the man you're becoming

• Why gray area faith might be the most important gray area to address first

• The Core Four framework: body, being, balance, and business

• Details on Kari's upcoming November 2026 private retreat

• The one decision that changes everything: stop living like you're invincible

If you're a man or woman over 50 who's been coasting, numbing, avoiding, or just going through the motions, this episode is the one that might finally make you stop and ask, "What am I doing with the time I have left?" And then do something about it.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on where you actually are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. It includes a behavioral scan and two deep coaching sessions. It's not therapy. It's clarity. And it's designed for the person who's done waiting.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

Interested in the November 2026 Retreat?

Email: hello@graytonic.com or message Kari on LinkedIn

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.



]]> Tue, 05 May 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1318 If you only had three years left, what would you change? Not hypothetically. Actually. Would you keep drinking the way you are? Would you stay in the marriage you've been checked out of? Would you keep putting off the conversations, the reconciliation, the real work of becoming who you're supposed to be?

In Episode 12 of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear delivers the wake-up call that most people over 50 need but aren't getting. She shares a powerful exercise from one of her private client retreats, the exact framework that made a room full of high-performing men and women get honest about their lives. It comes down to three questions: what do you need to surrender, what do you need to accomplish, and who do you need to become?

This is not a motivational speech. This is a mirror. And if you've been going through the motions, telling yourself there's still time, this episode is going to change how you think about every day you have left.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The "3 years left" exercise Kari uses at her private retreats and how it wakes people up

• A conversation with a 44-year-old man who realized his kids won't have a father for most of their adult lives

• The three questions: surrender, accomplish, become, and how to use them starting today

• Why surrendering isn't giving up, it's making room for what actually matters

• The friendships, habits, and beliefs that are taking up space without adding value

• Ed Mylett's "identical twin" standard and what it means for the man you're becoming

• Why gray area faith might be the most important gray area to address first

• The Core Four framework: body, being, balance, and business

• Details on Kari's upcoming November 2026 private retreat

• The one decision that changes everything: stop living like you're invincible

If you're a man or woman over 50 who's been coasting, numbing, avoiding, or just going through the motions, this episode is the one that might finally make you stop and ask, "What am I doing with the time I have left?" And then do something about it.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on where you actually are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business. It includes a behavioral scan and two deep coaching sessions. It's not therapy. It's clarity. And it's designed for the person who's done waiting.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

Interested in the November 2026 Retreat?

Email: hello@graytonic.com or message Kari on LinkedIn

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

—————

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.



]]> men over 50, longevity, next chapter, time running out, legacy, wake up call, gray area drinking, gray area living, women over 50, spirituality, Christian, faith based content No Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic | The Identity Trap That’s Keeping You Stuck | Ep.11 11 11 Stop Calling Yourself an Alcoholic | The Identity Trap That’s Keeping You Stuck | Ep.11 full 900d585d-ee47-4d30-99c7-7334f2348c03 https://share.transistor.fm/s/3dee7d13 What if the label that was supposed to save you is actually the thing keeping you stuck?
Ten years ago, Kari Schwear quit drinking. She wasn't in crisis. She wasn't hitting rock bottom. She was a successful, functioning woman who knew something was off. And when she looked for help, the world gave her one answer: Alcoholics Anonymous. She went. She did the work. And she got something genuinely valuable from it. But she also got a permanent label that didn't fit. And after five months, she made the decision to walk away, not from recovery, but from an identity that was keeping her anchored to the past.

This episode is one of the most important conversations Kari has had on this podcast. She walks through the neuroscience, the psychology, and the real-life experience of what happens when you stop defining yourself by your worst chapter and start stepping into who you're actually becoming.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Kari's honest story of joining AA, what she gained, and why she left after five months

• The neuroscience of neuroplasticity and why your brain is literally not the same as it was

• James Clear's identity-behavior connection and why you act according to who you believe you are

• Labeling theory: how the words you use about yourself become a self-fulfilling prophecy

• Natural recovery research showing the majority of people change without formal treatment

• The 8-10% AA first-year sobriety statistic and what it might actually reveal

• Why this isn't just about alcohol: the identity traps in marriage, career, health, and purpose

• A five-step framework for rewriting your identity starting today

• The difference between honoring your past and being imprisoned by it

This episode is not anti-AA. It honors the program, the community, and the millions of lives it has saved. But it also says what a lot of people have been thinking and haven't had permission to say out loud: that you are allowed to become someone new. And science backs that up.

If you've done the work and the label no longer fits, this one is for you.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on who you actually are now, not who you used to be. It includes a behavioral scan and two deep coaching sessions designed for high-performing leaders who know something needs to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

This episode is going to resonate with a lot of people who have been thinking it but haven't said it out loud. If that's someone you know, share it. Sometimes one conversation is all it takes to set someone free.

#StopCallingYourselfAnAlcoholic #IdentityShift #GrayAreaDrinking #QuitDrinkingWithoutAA #Neuroplasticity #LabelingTheory #RecoveryIdentity #BeyondTheGray #AlcoholFree #MidlifeTransformation #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #AtomicHabits #SelfFulfillingProphecy #IdentityChange #AAAlternatives #SoberCurious #MenOver50

]]> What if the label that was supposed to save you is actually the thing keeping you stuck?
Ten years ago, Kari Schwear quit drinking. She wasn't in crisis. She wasn't hitting rock bottom. She was a successful, functioning woman who knew something was off. And when she looked for help, the world gave her one answer: Alcoholics Anonymous. She went. She did the work. And she got something genuinely valuable from it. But she also got a permanent label that didn't fit. And after five months, she made the decision to walk away, not from recovery, but from an identity that was keeping her anchored to the past.

This episode is one of the most important conversations Kari has had on this podcast. She walks through the neuroscience, the psychology, and the real-life experience of what happens when you stop defining yourself by your worst chapter and start stepping into who you're actually becoming.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Kari's honest story of joining AA, what she gained, and why she left after five months

• The neuroscience of neuroplasticity and why your brain is literally not the same as it was

• James Clear's identity-behavior connection and why you act according to who you believe you are

• Labeling theory: how the words you use about yourself become a self-fulfilling prophecy

• Natural recovery research showing the majority of people change without formal treatment

• The 8-10% AA first-year sobriety statistic and what it might actually reveal

• Why this isn't just about alcohol: the identity traps in marriage, career, health, and purpose

• A five-step framework for rewriting your identity starting today

• The difference between honoring your past and being imprisoned by it

This episode is not anti-AA. It honors the program, the community, and the millions of lives it has saved. But it also says what a lot of people have been thinking and haven't had permission to say out loud: that you are allowed to become someone new. And science backs that up.

If you've done the work and the label no longer fits, this one is for you.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on who you actually are now, not who you used to be. It includes a behavioral scan and two deep coaching sessions designed for high-performing leaders who know something needs to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

This episode is going to resonate with a lot of people who have been thinking it but haven't said it out loud. If that's someone you know, share it. Sometimes one conversation is all it takes to set someone free.

#StopCallingYourselfAnAlcoholic #IdentityShift #GrayAreaDrinking #QuitDrinkingWithoutAA #Neuroplasticity #LabelingTheory #RecoveryIdentity #BeyondTheGray #AlcoholFree #MidlifeTransformation #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #AtomicHabits #SelfFulfillingProphecy #IdentityChange #AAAlternatives #SoberCurious #MenOver50

]]> Tue, 28 Apr 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1405 What if the label that was supposed to save you is actually the thing keeping you stuck?
Ten years ago, Kari Schwear quit drinking. She wasn't in crisis. She wasn't hitting rock bottom. She was a successful, functioning woman who knew something was off. And when she looked for help, the world gave her one answer: Alcoholics Anonymous. She went. She did the work. And she got something genuinely valuable from it. But she also got a permanent label that didn't fit. And after five months, she made the decision to walk away, not from recovery, but from an identity that was keeping her anchored to the past.

This episode is one of the most important conversations Kari has had on this podcast. She walks through the neuroscience, the psychology, and the real-life experience of what happens when you stop defining yourself by your worst chapter and start stepping into who you're actually becoming.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Kari's honest story of joining AA, what she gained, and why she left after five months

• The neuroscience of neuroplasticity and why your brain is literally not the same as it was

• James Clear's identity-behavior connection and why you act according to who you believe you are

• Labeling theory: how the words you use about yourself become a self-fulfilling prophecy

• Natural recovery research showing the majority of people change without formal treatment

• The 8-10% AA first-year sobriety statistic and what it might actually reveal

• Why this isn't just about alcohol: the identity traps in marriage, career, health, and purpose

• A five-step framework for rewriting your identity starting today

• The difference between honoring your past and being imprisoned by it

This episode is not anti-AA. It honors the program, the community, and the millions of lives it has saved. But it also says what a lot of people have been thinking and haven't had permission to say out loud: that you are allowed to become someone new. And science backs that up.

If you've done the work and the label no longer fits, this one is for you.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on who you actually are now, not who you used to be. It includes a behavioral scan and two deep coaching sessions designed for high-performing leaders who know something needs to shift.

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/

New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next.

This episode is going to resonate with a lot of people who have been thinking it but haven't said it out loud. If that's someone you know, share it. Sometimes one conversation is all it takes to set someone free.

#StopCallingYourselfAnAlcoholic #IdentityShift #GrayAreaDrinking #QuitDrinkingWithoutAA #Neuroplasticity #LabelingTheory #RecoveryIdentity #BeyondTheGray #AlcoholFree #MidlifeTransformation #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #AtomicHabits #SelfFulfillingProphecy #IdentityChange #AAAlternatives #SoberCurious #MenOver50

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No Still Waking Up at 3AM? A Sleep Coach Reveals What It’s Really Costing You | Ep.10 10 10 Still Waking Up at 3AM? A Sleep Coach Reveals What It’s Really Costing You | Ep.10 full 813cba38-2adb-436c-8c9d-85a1cb620fdb https://share.transistor.fm/s/6d628c61 You're not sleeping as well as you think you are. And if you're waking up at 3 a.m. with your brain on full blast, this episode is going to explain exactly why, and what to do about it.

In Episode 10 of Beyond the Gray, Kari welcomes her very first guest: holistic sleep coach Morgan Adams. Morgan spent nearly a decade dependent on Ambien, survived breast cancer twice, and has since built her career around helping adults, especially those over 50, completely transform their relationship with sleep. This conversation is packed with science, real talk, and practical tools you can start using tonight.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The biggest sleep myths adults over 50 still believe, especially "I function fine on less sleep"

• Why your brain overestimates how well you're performing when you're sleep-deprived

• What alcohol is actually doing to your sleep (one drink decreases quality by 24%)

• Why calling yourself "a bad sleeper" or "a night owl" might be an identity trap, not biology

• The camping study that reset self-proclaimed night owls' circadian rhythms in two weeks

• What couples should do first when snoring is destroying both sleep and the relationship

• The book every couple dealing with sleep conflict needs to read (Sharing the Covers by Dr. Wendy Troxell)

• Morgan's top sleep tools: Eight Sleep cooling pad, Ozlo earbuds, and the Moonbird breathwork device

• Why a TV in the bedroom might be quietly sabotaging your rest

• The one gray area around sleep people tolerate way too long and what it's costing them

If you're a high-performing adult over 50 who's been telling yourself you're fine on six hours, or if you've been using alcohol to fall asleep and wondering why you keep waking up at 3 a.m., this conversation is going to change the way you think about rest.

GUEST: Morgan Adams, Holistic Sleep Coach

Website: MorganAdamsWellness.com

Instagram: @morgan.adams.wellness

Free 3AM Wake-Up Guide

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:
https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/


]]> You're not sleeping as well as you think you are. And if you're waking up at 3 a.m. with your brain on full blast, this episode is going to explain exactly why, and what to do about it.

In Episode 10 of Beyond the Gray, Kari welcomes her very first guest: holistic sleep coach Morgan Adams. Morgan spent nearly a decade dependent on Ambien, survived breast cancer twice, and has since built her career around helping adults, especially those over 50, completely transform their relationship with sleep. This conversation is packed with science, real talk, and practical tools you can start using tonight.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The biggest sleep myths adults over 50 still believe, especially "I function fine on less sleep"

• Why your brain overestimates how well you're performing when you're sleep-deprived

• What alcohol is actually doing to your sleep (one drink decreases quality by 24%)

• Why calling yourself "a bad sleeper" or "a night owl" might be an identity trap, not biology

• The camping study that reset self-proclaimed night owls' circadian rhythms in two weeks

• What couples should do first when snoring is destroying both sleep and the relationship

• The book every couple dealing with sleep conflict needs to read (Sharing the Covers by Dr. Wendy Troxell)

• Morgan's top sleep tools: Eight Sleep cooling pad, Ozlo earbuds, and the Moonbird breathwork device

• Why a TV in the bedroom might be quietly sabotaging your rest

• The one gray area around sleep people tolerate way too long and what it's costing them

If you're a high-performing adult over 50 who's been telling yourself you're fine on six hours, or if you've been using alcohol to fall asleep and wondering why you keep waking up at 3 a.m., this conversation is going to change the way you think about rest.

GUEST: Morgan Adams, Holistic Sleep Coach

Website: MorganAdamsWellness.com

Instagram: @morgan.adams.wellness

Free 3AM Wake-Up Guide

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:
https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/


]]> Tue, 21 Apr 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1998 You're not sleeping as well as you think you are. And if you're waking up at 3 a.m. with your brain on full blast, this episode is going to explain exactly why, and what to do about it.

In Episode 10 of Beyond the Gray, Kari welcomes her very first guest: holistic sleep coach Morgan Adams. Morgan spent nearly a decade dependent on Ambien, survived breast cancer twice, and has since built her career around helping adults, especially those over 50, completely transform their relationship with sleep. This conversation is packed with science, real talk, and practical tools you can start using tonight.

In this episode you'll hear:

• The biggest sleep myths adults over 50 still believe, especially "I function fine on less sleep"

• Why your brain overestimates how well you're performing when you're sleep-deprived

• What alcohol is actually doing to your sleep (one drink decreases quality by 24%)

• Why calling yourself "a bad sleeper" or "a night owl" might be an identity trap, not biology

• The camping study that reset self-proclaimed night owls' circadian rhythms in two weeks

• What couples should do first when snoring is destroying both sleep and the relationship

• The book every couple dealing with sleep conflict needs to read (Sharing the Covers by Dr. Wendy Troxell)

• Morgan's top sleep tools: Eight Sleep cooling pad, Ozlo earbuds, and the Moonbird breathwork device

• Why a TV in the bedroom might be quietly sabotaging your rest

• The one gray area around sleep people tolerate way too long and what it's costing them

If you're a high-performing adult over 50 who's been telling yourself you're fine on six hours, or if you've been using alcohol to fall asleep and wondering why you keep waking up at 3 a.m., this conversation is going to change the way you think about rest.

GUEST: Morgan Adams, Holistic Sleep Coach

Website: MorganAdamsWellness.com

Instagram: @morgan.adams.wellness

Free 3AM Wake-Up Guide

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:
https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/


]]> sleep, sleep deprived, gray area drinking, alcohol and sleep, sleep coach, sleep over 50, sleep deprived, sleep health, gray areas, healthy sleep, sleep tips, sleep tools, partner snores No "Am I Drinking Too Much?" (The Stages of Change Gray Area Drinkers Need to Hear) | Ep.9 9 9 "Am I Drinking Too Much?" (The Stages of Change Gray Area Drinkers Need to Hear) | Ep.9 full 4420bfaa-20a0-48ed-8588-20cc1607cfa4 https://share.transistor.fm/s/cc864270 "Why am I drinking more than I used to? Why do I keep saying I'll cut back and then I don't?" If those questions have been quietly circling in the back of your mind, this is the episode that's going to meet you exactly where you are.

Kari walks through the Transtheoretical Model of Change, the psychological framework that shows you exactly which stage you're in right now and why every single one of them matters. She shares the three "seeds" that were planted in her own life before she ever quit drinking, what cognitive dissonance actually is and why the discomfort you're feeling is a sign your values are working, and the honest truth about why "I'm not ready yet" might be the most important thing you've ever said to yourself.

This isn't about pressure. It's about permission. Permission to stop thinking you should already be further along, and to trust that the process you're in is already doing its work.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

Book a Call with Kari:
https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:
https://www.graytonic.com/

CONNECT WITH KARI
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/



]]> "Why am I drinking more than I used to? Why do I keep saying I'll cut back and then I don't?" If those questions have been quietly circling in the back of your mind, this is the episode that's going to meet you exactly where you are.

Kari walks through the Transtheoretical Model of Change, the psychological framework that shows you exactly which stage you're in right now and why every single one of them matters. She shares the three "seeds" that were planted in her own life before she ever quit drinking, what cognitive dissonance actually is and why the discomfort you're feeling is a sign your values are working, and the honest truth about why "I'm not ready yet" might be the most important thing you've ever said to yourself.

This isn't about pressure. It's about permission. Permission to stop thinking you should already be further along, and to trust that the process you're in is already doing its work.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

Book a Call with Kari:
https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:
https://www.graytonic.com/

CONNECT WITH KARI
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/



]]> Tue, 14 Apr 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1504 "Why am I drinking more than I used to? Why do I keep saying I'll cut back and then I don't?" If those questions have been quietly circling in the back of your mind, this is the episode that's going to meet you exactly where you are.

Kari walks through the Transtheoretical Model of Change, the psychological framework that shows you exactly which stage you're in right now and why every single one of them matters. She shares the three "seeds" that were planted in her own life before she ever quit drinking, what cognitive dissonance actually is and why the discomfort you're feeling is a sign your values are working, and the honest truth about why "I'm not ready yet" might be the most important thing you've ever said to yourself.

This isn't about pressure. It's about permission. Permission to stop thinking you should already be further along, and to trust that the process you're in is already doing its work.

READY TO GO DEEPER?

Book a Call with Kari:
https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:
https://www.graytonic.com/

CONNECT WITH KARI
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/



]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No Why Couples Drift Apart (And How to Reconnect With Your Spouse) | Ep.8 8 8 Why Couples Drift Apart (And How to Reconnect With Your Spouse) | Ep.8 full 32168693-2d3d-4b94-8af1-98c58b3f30ea https://share.transistor.fm/s/a6498c17 You love your spouse. But do you actually like them right now? If that question caught you off guard, you're not alone. And your marriage isn't over. Something important is just trying to get your attention.

In Episode 8 of Beyond the Gray, Kari and her husband Rob sit down for a raw, real conversation about why long-term marriages drift apart, especially after 50. Not with a blow-up. Not with an affair. But with silence, assumptions, shifting roles, and the slow fade that sneaks up on couples who are too busy keeping life together to notice they've stopped connecting.

This episode is packed with practical tools you can start using this week to rebuild that connection, including a powerful card game, a simple string exercise, and honest questions that open doors most couples have quietly closed.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why long-term marriages drift apart slowly and how to recognize it before it's too late

• The reticular activating system and how your brain filters what you see in your spouse

• Why focusing on your partner's faults creates more of them (and what to focus on instead)

• The And card game: structured conversations that rebuild connection in real time

• The Invisible String Test from Diary of a CEO and what it reveals about phone habits

• Why "what they do" and "who they are" are two very different reasons to stay married

• The connection between marital disconnection and gray area drinking

• Rob's honest answer to "What made you fall in love with me?"

• Date night ideas that actually work (hint: dinner at the usual spot doesn't count)

• One simple thing you can do tonight to start shifting your marriage

If you're a man over 50 in a long-term marriage that feels more like coexisting than connecting, this conversation was made for you. And if you're a woman listening who's been feeling unseen, share this one with your spouse. It might start a conversation you've both been avoiding.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The His/Hers/Ours series helps couples see each other clearly again using the Intellect Scan. No therapy. No blame. Just clarity on how you're each wired and how to communicate in a way that actually lands. And the Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on where you are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business.
👉https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#couples

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/


]]> You love your spouse. But do you actually like them right now? If that question caught you off guard, you're not alone. And your marriage isn't over. Something important is just trying to get your attention.

In Episode 8 of Beyond the Gray, Kari and her husband Rob sit down for a raw, real conversation about why long-term marriages drift apart, especially after 50. Not with a blow-up. Not with an affair. But with silence, assumptions, shifting roles, and the slow fade that sneaks up on couples who are too busy keeping life together to notice they've stopped connecting.

This episode is packed with practical tools you can start using this week to rebuild that connection, including a powerful card game, a simple string exercise, and honest questions that open doors most couples have quietly closed.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why long-term marriages drift apart slowly and how to recognize it before it's too late

• The reticular activating system and how your brain filters what you see in your spouse

• Why focusing on your partner's faults creates more of them (and what to focus on instead)

• The And card game: structured conversations that rebuild connection in real time

• The Invisible String Test from Diary of a CEO and what it reveals about phone habits

• Why "what they do" and "who they are" are two very different reasons to stay married

• The connection between marital disconnection and gray area drinking

• Rob's honest answer to "What made you fall in love with me?"

• Date night ideas that actually work (hint: dinner at the usual spot doesn't count)

• One simple thing you can do tonight to start shifting your marriage

If you're a man over 50 in a long-term marriage that feels more like coexisting than connecting, this conversation was made for you. And if you're a woman listening who's been feeling unseen, share this one with your spouse. It might start a conversation you've both been avoiding.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The His/Hers/Ours series helps couples see each other clearly again using the Intellect Scan. No therapy. No blame. Just clarity on how you're each wired and how to communicate in a way that actually lands. And the Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on where you are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business.
👉https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#couples

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/


]]> Tue, 07 Apr 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1829 You love your spouse. But do you actually like them right now? If that question caught you off guard, you're not alone. And your marriage isn't over. Something important is just trying to get your attention.

In Episode 8 of Beyond the Gray, Kari and her husband Rob sit down for a raw, real conversation about why long-term marriages drift apart, especially after 50. Not with a blow-up. Not with an affair. But with silence, assumptions, shifting roles, and the slow fade that sneaks up on couples who are too busy keeping life together to notice they've stopped connecting.

This episode is packed with practical tools you can start using this week to rebuild that connection, including a powerful card game, a simple string exercise, and honest questions that open doors most couples have quietly closed.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why long-term marriages drift apart slowly and how to recognize it before it's too late

• The reticular activating system and how your brain filters what you see in your spouse

• Why focusing on your partner's faults creates more of them (and what to focus on instead)

• The And card game: structured conversations that rebuild connection in real time

• The Invisible String Test from Diary of a CEO and what it reveals about phone habits

• Why "what they do" and "who they are" are two very different reasons to stay married

• The connection between marital disconnection and gray area drinking

• Rob's honest answer to "What made you fall in love with me?"

• Date night ideas that actually work (hint: dinner at the usual spot doesn't count)

• One simple thing you can do tonight to start shifting your marriage

If you're a man over 50 in a long-term marriage that feels more like coexisting than connecting, this conversation was made for you. And if you're a woman listening who's been feeling unseen, share this one with your spouse. It might start a conversation you've both been avoiding.

—————

READY TO GO DEEPER?

The His/Hers/Ours series helps couples see each other clearly again using the Intellect Scan. No therapy. No blame. Just clarity on how you're each wired and how to communicate in a way that actually lands. And the Gray Area Insights Experience helps you get clear on where you are across all four areas of life: body, being, balance, and business.
👉https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#couples

Gray Area Insights Experience 👇

https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

Book a Call with Kari:

https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min

Visit the Website:

https://www.graytonic.com/

—————

CONNECT WITH KARI

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/


]]> long term marriages, gray area drinking, gray areas in life, over 50, midlife, marriage, relationships, how to connect No Why Successful People Still Feel Empty: Faith, Purpose, and Reconnecting With God | Ep.7 7 7 Why Successful People Still Feel Empty: Faith, Purpose, and Reconnecting With God | Ep.7 full 781e23bd-b996-4fd7-bd04-370cd3e83017 https://share.transistor.fm/s/bf271fe9 You built the career, the business, the life. You lead well and you provide. So why does it still feel like something's missing? Why do so many successful men over 50 still feel restless, disconnected, and unsettled even when life looks great on the outside?

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear talks about the one area most people avoid but almost everyone feels: the spiritual disconnect underneath gray area drinking and stress. This isn't a religious conversation. It's an honest look at what happens when high performers carry everything alone for too long, and the invitation that changes everything when you're finally willing to put it down.

She shares the Pike Experiment and why so many people are still bumping into walls that were removed years ago, a deeply personal morning conversation with her husband Rob about prayer and stress, and why "being," your internal world and connection to God, is the area of life that holds everything else together.

If you've been searching for peace, purpose, and meaning but nothing you've achieved has quite delivered it, this episode might be the one that shifts something for you.

To learn more about the Gray Area Insights Experience, click HERE.
To schedule a call with Kari directly, click HERE. 

]]> You built the career, the business, the life. You lead well and you provide. So why does it still feel like something's missing? Why do so many successful men over 50 still feel restless, disconnected, and unsettled even when life looks great on the outside?

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear talks about the one area most people avoid but almost everyone feels: the spiritual disconnect underneath gray area drinking and stress. This isn't a religious conversation. It's an honest look at what happens when high performers carry everything alone for too long, and the invitation that changes everything when you're finally willing to put it down.

She shares the Pike Experiment and why so many people are still bumping into walls that were removed years ago, a deeply personal morning conversation with her husband Rob about prayer and stress, and why "being," your internal world and connection to God, is the area of life that holds everything else together.

If you've been searching for peace, purpose, and meaning but nothing you've achieved has quite delivered it, this episode might be the one that shifts something for you.

To learn more about the Gray Area Insights Experience, click HERE.
To schedule a call with Kari directly, click HERE. 

]]> Tue, 31 Mar 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 980 You built the career, the business, the life. You lead well and you provide. So why does it still feel like something's missing? Why do so many successful men over 50 still feel restless, disconnected, and unsettled even when life looks great on the outside?

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear talks about the one area most people avoid but almost everyone feels: the spiritual disconnect underneath gray area drinking and stress. This isn't a religious conversation. It's an honest look at what happens when high performers carry everything alone for too long, and the invitation that changes everything when you're finally willing to put it down.

She shares the Pike Experiment and why so many people are still bumping into walls that were removed years ago, a deeply personal morning conversation with her husband Rob about prayer and stress, and why "being," your internal world and connection to God, is the area of life that holds everything else together.

If you've been searching for peace, purpose, and meaning but nothing you've achieved has quite delivered it, this episode might be the one that shifts something for you.

To learn more about the Gray Area Insights Experience, click HERE.
To schedule a call with Kari directly, click HERE. 

]]> gray area drinking, successful men over 50, business owners, God, faith, connection, relationship with God, fulfillment, purpose, drinking, podcast for men No How to Navigate Social Life Without Drinking (And Still Feel Like You Belong) | Ep.6 6 6 How to Navigate Social Life Without Drinking (And Still Feel Like You Belong) | Ep.6 full 69029146-4d7c-443a-a947-d8b326c9a48a https://share.transistor.fm/s/7e953fbb "What will people think if I'm not drinking?" If you've ever asked yourself that before a business dinner, a networking event, or a golf outing, you're not alone. And you're not weak for thinking it. You're human.

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari breaks down what she calls the social trap and why the fear of not belonging is one of the biggest things keeping people stuck in gray area drinking. She shares what actually happened when she showed up to events without a drink in her hand, the four-step framework she uses with clients to navigate any social setting with confidence, and why the identity shift from "trying not to drink" to "I'm someone who doesn't need it" changes everything.

You'll also hear why the people who care most about your not drinking are usually the ones questioning their own, and how one client's decision not to drink at a work dinner opened a door he never expected.

If you've been worried about what quitting looks like socially, this episode will change how you think about it.
Learn more about Kari and her work by visiting the GrayTonic website. 
For the Gray Area Insights Experience, you can find more here 👉 https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

]]> "What will people think if I'm not drinking?" If you've ever asked yourself that before a business dinner, a networking event, or a golf outing, you're not alone. And you're not weak for thinking it. You're human.

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari breaks down what she calls the social trap and why the fear of not belonging is one of the biggest things keeping people stuck in gray area drinking. She shares what actually happened when she showed up to events without a drink in her hand, the four-step framework she uses with clients to navigate any social setting with confidence, and why the identity shift from "trying not to drink" to "I'm someone who doesn't need it" changes everything.

You'll also hear why the people who care most about your not drinking are usually the ones questioning their own, and how one client's decision not to drink at a work dinner opened a door he never expected.

If you've been worried about what quitting looks like socially, this episode will change how you think about it.
Learn more about Kari and her work by visiting the GrayTonic website. 
For the Gray Area Insights Experience, you can find more here 👉 https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

]]> Tue, 24 Mar 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1451 "What will people think if I'm not drinking?" If you've ever asked yourself that before a business dinner, a networking event, or a golf outing, you're not alone. And you're not weak for thinking it. You're human.

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari breaks down what she calls the social trap and why the fear of not belonging is one of the biggest things keeping people stuck in gray area drinking. She shares what actually happened when she showed up to events without a drink in her hand, the four-step framework she uses with clients to navigate any social setting with confidence, and why the identity shift from "trying not to drink" to "I'm someone who doesn't need it" changes everything.

You'll also hear why the people who care most about your not drinking are usually the ones questioning their own, and how one client's decision not to drink at a work dinner opened a door he never expected.

If you've been worried about what quitting looks like socially, this episode will change how you think about it.
Learn more about Kari and her work by visiting the GrayTonic website. 
For the Gray Area Insights Experience, you can find more here 👉 https://www.graytonic.com/coaching-programs-leaders-couples/#insight

]]> socializing without alcohol, gray area drinking, men over 50, how to socialize without alcohol, keys to socializing alcohol free, sober curious No The Moderation Trap: Why Cutting Back on Alcohol Feels So Hard | Ep.5 5 5 The Moderation Trap: Why Cutting Back on Alcohol Feels So Hard | Ep.5 full bd5cd5c2-e52f-4936-b605-4d130e3cd211 https://share.transistor.fm/s/67c9b76b You told yourself you'd only have two. By the third glass, you're already negotiating with yourself about tomorrow. Sound familiar?

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari breaks down why moderation becomes a mental trap for gray area drinkers and why it's actually harder than quitting. You'll learn about the science behind decision fatigue, why your willpower disappears by the end of the day, and what happens when you stop negotiating with yourself and try something different.

If you've tried the weekend-only rule, the two-drink max, zebra striping, or any other strategy that keeps falling apart, this one is for you.

This is not a sobriety podcast. This is a clarity podcast. And moderation might be the thing standing between you and the peace you've been looking for.
To learn more about Kari and her work, visit the GrayTonic website: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> You told yourself you'd only have two. By the third glass, you're already negotiating with yourself about tomorrow. Sound familiar?

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari breaks down why moderation becomes a mental trap for gray area drinkers and why it's actually harder than quitting. You'll learn about the science behind decision fatigue, why your willpower disappears by the end of the day, and what happens when you stop negotiating with yourself and try something different.

If you've tried the weekend-only rule, the two-drink max, zebra striping, or any other strategy that keeps falling apart, this one is for you.

This is not a sobriety podcast. This is a clarity podcast. And moderation might be the thing standing between you and the peace you've been looking for.
To learn more about Kari and her work, visit the GrayTonic website: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> Tue, 17 Mar 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 982 You told yourself you'd only have two. By the third glass, you're already negotiating with yourself about tomorrow. Sound familiar?

In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari breaks down why moderation becomes a mental trap for gray area drinkers and why it's actually harder than quitting. You'll learn about the science behind decision fatigue, why your willpower disappears by the end of the day, and what happens when you stop negotiating with yourself and try something different.

If you've tried the weekend-only rule, the two-drink max, zebra striping, or any other strategy that keeps falling apart, this one is for you.

This is not a sobriety podcast. This is a clarity podcast. And moderation might be the thing standing between you and the peace you've been looking for.
To learn more about Kari and her work, visit the GrayTonic website: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> moderating drinking, zebra striping, gray area drinking, sobercurious, cutting back on alcohol, men over 50 No When One Spouse Changes and the Other Doesn’t: How to Save Your Marriage After 50 | Ep.4 4 4 When One Spouse Changes and the Other Doesn’t: How to Save Your Marriage After 50 | Ep.4 full 829503b9-1b2d-4d33-a354-7e58354bb092 https://share.transistor.fm/s/37c80d69 What happens when one spouse starts growing… and the other doesn’t?

In this episode, Kari and her husband Rob share the honest story of what happened when their 30-year marriage hit a breaking point.

They discuss resentment, identity shifts, turning 50, communication gaps, and the hard conversations most couples avoid.

If you feel like you and your partner are drifting apart, this episode offers clarity — and practical steps to reconnect.

To learn more about the Intellect Scan and the His/Hers/Ours Relationship Series, visit our website HERE or by visiting the GrayTonic website here: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> What happens when one spouse starts growing… and the other doesn’t?

In this episode, Kari and her husband Rob share the honest story of what happened when their 30-year marriage hit a breaking point.

They discuss resentment, identity shifts, turning 50, communication gaps, and the hard conversations most couples avoid.

If you feel like you and your partner are drifting apart, this episode offers clarity — and practical steps to reconnect.

To learn more about the Intellect Scan and the His/Hers/Ours Relationship Series, visit our website HERE or by visiting the GrayTonic website here: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> Tue, 10 Mar 2026 02:00:00 -0700 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 2120 What happens when one spouse starts growing… and the other doesn’t?

In this episode, Kari and her husband Rob share the honest story of what happened when their 30-year marriage hit a breaking point.

They discuss resentment, identity shifts, turning 50, communication gaps, and the hard conversations most couples avoid.

If you feel like you and your partner are drifting apart, this episode offers clarity — and practical steps to reconnect.

To learn more about the Intellect Scan and the His/Hers/Ours Relationship Series, visit our website HERE or by visiting the GrayTonic website here: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> when one spouse changes, growing apart in marriage, marriage after 50, midlife marriage problems, how to save your marriage, empty nest marriage, resentment in marriage, communication problems in marriage, reconnecting with your spouse, marriage and personal growth No Why Willpower Isn’t Working (It’s an Identity Problem) | Ep.3 3 3 Why Willpower Isn’t Working (It’s an Identity Problem) | Ep.3 full 1c182505-27fc-47ee-b708-414202e5690c https://share.transistor.fm/s/cae983c2 Why do you keep starting over — even when you’re motivated?

In this episode, Kari explains why willpower isn’t the issue. Identity is.

If your habits keep repeating — whether it’s drinking, discipline, marriage, or leadership — this conversation will help you understand the real driver behind your behavior and how to consciously step into the next version of yourself.

If this resonates and you want to explore your patterns more deeply, you can find the link in the show notes.

There is life beyond the gray.


Want to explore this topic further personally? Book at call with Kari HERE.
Or Visit the GrayTonic website here: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> Why do you keep starting over — even when you’re motivated?

In this episode, Kari explains why willpower isn’t the issue. Identity is.

If your habits keep repeating — whether it’s drinking, discipline, marriage, or leadership — this conversation will help you understand the real driver behind your behavior and how to consciously step into the next version of yourself.

If this resonates and you want to explore your patterns more deeply, you can find the link in the show notes.

There is life beyond the gray.


Want to explore this topic further personally? Book at call with Kari HERE.
Or Visit the GrayTonic website here: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> Tue, 03 Mar 2026 02:03:00 -0800 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1098 Why do you keep starting over — even when you’re motivated?

In this episode, Kari explains why willpower isn’t the issue. Identity is.

If your habits keep repeating — whether it’s drinking, discipline, marriage, or leadership — this conversation will help you understand the real driver behind your behavior and how to consciously step into the next version of yourself.

If this resonates and you want to explore your patterns more deeply, you can find the link in the show notes.

There is life beyond the gray.


Want to explore this topic further personally? Book at call with Kari HERE.
Or Visit the GrayTonic website here: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No Why You Keep Going Back to Drinking (And How to Stop) : The Power of the Pause | Ep.2 2 2 Why You Keep Going Back to Drinking (And How to Stop) : The Power of the Pause | Ep.2 full f16972f3-b2ac-4cf6-ba73-2b06ffafc14c https://share.transistor.fm/s/e2b444e0 It’s not about the alcohol.
It’s about the relief.

In Episode 2 of Beyond the Gray, Kari explains why gray area drinking isn’t a willpower problem — it’s a pattern problem.

If you’ve ever promised yourself you wouldn’t drink… and then did anyway, this episode breaks down why that happens.

You’ll learn:

  • How habits are wired in the brain
  • Why stress triggers autopilot drinking
  • Why moderation feels exhausting
  • The 10-minute pause that interrupts cravings
  • How daily intentions rebuild identity

This is practical, science-backed strategy — not shame.
The pause is all about questioning the drink.... literally.

Ready to look at your life's core 4 areas and gain insight into your gray areas? Download the FREE Gray Area Audit Here


Next episode: the identity shift that makes change stick. 

Subscribe and follow so you don’t miss it.
For more information about Kari and how to work with her, visit the GrayTonic website: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> It’s not about the alcohol.
It’s about the relief.

In Episode 2 of Beyond the Gray, Kari explains why gray area drinking isn’t a willpower problem — it’s a pattern problem.

If you’ve ever promised yourself you wouldn’t drink… and then did anyway, this episode breaks down why that happens.

You’ll learn:

  • How habits are wired in the brain
  • Why stress triggers autopilot drinking
  • Why moderation feels exhausting
  • The 10-minute pause that interrupts cravings
  • How daily intentions rebuild identity

This is practical, science-backed strategy — not shame.
The pause is all about questioning the drink.... literally.

Ready to look at your life's core 4 areas and gain insight into your gray areas? Download the FREE Gray Area Audit Here


Next episode: the identity shift that makes change stick. 

Subscribe and follow so you don’t miss it.
For more information about Kari and how to work with her, visit the GrayTonic website: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> Tue, 03 Mar 2026 02:02:00 -0800 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1328 It’s not about the alcohol.
It’s about the relief.

In Episode 2 of Beyond the Gray, Kari explains why gray area drinking isn’t a willpower problem — it’s a pattern problem.

If you’ve ever promised yourself you wouldn’t drink… and then did anyway, this episode breaks down why that happens.

You’ll learn:

  • How habits are wired in the brain
  • Why stress triggers autopilot drinking
  • Why moderation feels exhausting
  • The 10-minute pause that interrupts cravings
  • How daily intentions rebuild identity

This is practical, science-backed strategy — not shame.
The pause is all about questioning the drink.... literally.

Ready to look at your life's core 4 areas and gain insight into your gray areas? Download the FREE Gray Area Audit Here


Next episode: the identity shift that makes change stick. 

Subscribe and follow so you don’t miss it.
For more information about Kari and how to work with her, visit the GrayTonic website: https://www.graytonic.com/

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No You’re Not an Alcoholic… But You’re Not Fine Either : The Truth About Gray Area Drinking Over 50 | Ep.1 1 1 You’re Not an Alcoholic… But You’re Not Fine Either : The Truth About Gray Area Drinking Over 50 | Ep.1 full ff62309c-1a3f-4b9c-b53e-25fc39145a6f https://share.transistor.fm/s/4d9f9e81 You’re not an alcoholic.
But you’re not fine either.

In this powerful opening episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari speaks to successful men over 50 who feel “off” despite having built a good life.

This isn’t about rock bottom.
It’s about clarity.

You’ll learn:

  • What gray area drinking really is
  • Why alcohol affects your body differently after 50
  • The science behind sleep disruption and anxiety rebound
  • Why moderation feels exhausting
  • How alcohol becomes a solution to internal stress

Plus, a simple 4-area self-audit to help you identify where life may be out of alignment.

If you’ve been negotiating with yourself about drinking, performance, marriage, or purpose… this episode is for you.

Subscribe and follow. We’re just getting started.

Want to more on how to work with Kari? Visit the GrayTonic Website: https://www.graytonic.com/
👉To take the FREE 15-minute Gray Area Audit, CLICK HERE.

If you're curious to learn more about how I can help you with your gray area drinking, you can schedule a call with me HERE. 
I look forward to talking with you and hearing your story. No pressure, no hype. Just an honest conversation. 

]]> You’re not an alcoholic.
But you’re not fine either.

In this powerful opening episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari speaks to successful men over 50 who feel “off” despite having built a good life.

This isn’t about rock bottom.
It’s about clarity.

You’ll learn:

  • What gray area drinking really is
  • Why alcohol affects your body differently after 50
  • The science behind sleep disruption and anxiety rebound
  • Why moderation feels exhausting
  • How alcohol becomes a solution to internal stress

Plus, a simple 4-area self-audit to help you identify where life may be out of alignment.

If you’ve been negotiating with yourself about drinking, performance, marriage, or purpose… this episode is for you.

Subscribe and follow. We’re just getting started.

Want to more on how to work with Kari? Visit the GrayTonic Website: https://www.graytonic.com/
👉To take the FREE 15-minute Gray Area Audit, CLICK HERE.

If you're curious to learn more about how I can help you with your gray area drinking, you can schedule a call with me HERE. 
I look forward to talking with you and hearing your story. No pressure, no hype. Just an honest conversation. 

]]> Tue, 03 Mar 2026 02:00:00 -0800 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 1180 You’re not an alcoholic.
But you’re not fine either.

In this powerful opening episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari speaks to successful men over 50 who feel “off” despite having built a good life.

This isn’t about rock bottom.
It’s about clarity.

You’ll learn:

  • What gray area drinking really is
  • Why alcohol affects your body differently after 50
  • The science behind sleep disruption and anxiety rebound
  • Why moderation feels exhausting
  • How alcohol becomes a solution to internal stress

Plus, a simple 4-area self-audit to help you identify where life may be out of alignment.

If you’ve been negotiating with yourself about drinking, performance, marriage, or purpose… this episode is for you.

Subscribe and follow. We’re just getting started.

Want to more on how to work with Kari? Visit the GrayTonic Website: https://www.graytonic.com/
👉To take the FREE 15-minute Gray Area Audit, CLICK HERE.

If you're curious to learn more about how I can help you with your gray area drinking, you can schedule a call with me HERE. 
I look forward to talking with you and hearing your story. No pressure, no hype. Just an honest conversation. 

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No Welcome to Beyond the Gray - The Trailer Episode Welcome to Beyond the Gray - The Trailer Episode trailer 36c18c41-4258-423a-8dbb-b4b64723081b https://share.transistor.fm/s/d6b42d43 Beyond the Gray is for high-functioning men over 50 who look like they have it all together — but know something's off. Host Kari Schwear works with business owners and leaders, navigating gray area drinking, stress, habits, relationships, faith, and identity. No rock bottom,  just that quiet "I can't keep doing this forever" feeling. Every episode gives you a real mindset shift, tool, or strategy you can use the same day — because the goal isn't to quit something... it's to get your edge back and optimize your health, relationships, clarity, and next chapter. Follow or subscribe to Beyond the Gray.

]]> Beyond the Gray is for high-functioning men over 50 who look like they have it all together — but know something's off. Host Kari Schwear works with business owners and leaders, navigating gray area drinking, stress, habits, relationships, faith, and identity. No rock bottom,  just that quiet "I can't keep doing this forever" feeling. Every episode gives you a real mindset shift, tool, or strategy you can use the same day — because the goal isn't to quit something... it's to get your edge back and optimize your health, relationships, clarity, and next chapter. Follow or subscribe to Beyond the Gray.

]]> Fri, 20 Feb 2026 11:49:30 -0800 Kari Schwear Kari Schwear 113 Beyond the Gray is for high-functioning men over 50 who look like they have it all together — but know something's off. Host Kari Schwear works with business owners and leaders, navigating gray area drinking, stress, habits, relationships, faith, and identity. No rock bottom,  just that quiet "I can't keep doing this forever" feeling. Every episode gives you a real mindset shift, tool, or strategy you can use the same day — because the goal isn't to quit something... it's to get your edge back and optimize your health, relationships, clarity, and next chapter. Follow or subscribe to Beyond the Gray.

]]> gray area drinking, men over 50, mens health, how to quit drinking, life after 50 No